


One of our own

by Danny24



Series: Leather and Lace [1]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, Blood and Violence, Death, Discrimination, F/F, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Lots of Angst, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Profiling, Rape/Non-con Elements, Religious Conflict, Self-Harm, Serial Murder, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Violence, Violence against Children, pediophilia, sexual child abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-06
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-02-22 15:50:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 52,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22585321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Danny24/pseuds/Danny24
Summary: Prequel to The worst dayEmma Swan is a new VICE Police Officer. Durning a strange murder investigation, Detective Regina Mills receives unsuspected help from Officer Swan.  Regina soon realizes Emma knows a lot more about her murder victim than what she led on.  Is Emma involved or is it pure coincidence, as Emma's checkered past, starts to collide with her present.AU Once upon a time
Relationships: Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan
Series: Leather and Lace [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1625134
Comments: 25
Kudos: 64





	1. The Detective

**Author's Note:**

> Prequel to The worst day  
> Read this one before The worst day  
> Mostly Once upon a time characters.  
> None of them are mine, except those that are.

**Preface**

Corporal Emma Swan was standing in the confines of Camp Dwyer the United States Marine Corps installation in the Gamir district of the Helmand River Valley in Afghanistan, near the fence. She was looking into nothingness. In her grasp was a crumpled letter. She has been expecting this reply for the last four months, ever since she asked Captain Charles Taylor to write her a referral. She had worked four years for the news in her hands, but now that she knew what her future held, she was terrified.

She was free. The Judge gave her the one thing she had craved all her life, and she had no idea what to do.

****

**_Case No. 2008-SJC-J-CR-142, presiding Judge Rumpel Gold_ ** _._

_ The Commonwealth of Massachusetts vs Juvenile 4796. Henceforth the Defendant. Misdemeanour petty theft, third conviction_ _._

_Regarding the case mentioned above, after a thorough investigation and a distinguished character reference letter from Captain. Charles Taylor, United States Marine Corps, Commanding Officer of the Defendant, it is my opinion that community sanctions on said Defendant assigned to an alternative program, in 2008 were successful. The Court determined a prohibition period of four years to be served by the Defendant. During the prohibition period, the Defendant exceeded expectations, allotting herself several commendations. As the Judge presiding this case, several factors were considered in sentencing and are stipulated as such. The seriousness of the crime, the Defendant's criminal record, and the age of the Defendant. Among the conditions of the probation period, the Defendant was encouraged to further her education. The Defendant completed her GED and enrolled for an Undergraduate Degree in Criminal Psychology. She indicated a willingness to continue her education upon release._

_The full-time period for the Program, as recommended by this Court, has been executed. The additional efforts the Defendant displayed, is an assurance of increased recidivism as a result of her intensive treatment during the four-year probation programme. It is this Court's opinion that the Program improved the likelihood that the Defendant will not commit a new offence._

_The Defendant displayed a readiness for reintegration into the community, without additional inmate individual program. Therefore, re-entry to civilian life is approved. The Court thus recommend unsupervised release._

_It has been a privilege to watch this individual progress through this Program. To observe the woman that she became. I sincerely hope only the best for her, on this new journey._

_His Honourable Judge R. Gold_

***

Rubbing a hand through her short blonde hair. In anticipation of this letter, she had started to let it grow out. For the duration of her deployment, she wore her hair like any other Marine, brush-cut, jarhead. Swan looked to the unblemished horizon once more. Her mind was sifting through its limited material on emotions, to figure out what it was that she felt. It was a conglomerate of feelings. A sadness, for a chapter ending. Relieve, she guessed, combined with anticipation. For the first time in her life, she would make the choice. She did feel the magnitude of this new-found freedom. She could do whatever she wanted, settle where she chose. The thought brought tears to her eyes. It would also mean that she needed to take responsibility. From this moment forth, she would be accountable for her actions. She let the tears finally fall over her cheeks, while her heart ached, and her face smiled.

**Chapter 1**

Boston mornings still held a nip in the air even though the days were warming up in March. Detective Regina Mills was grateful for the sensible choice in footwear that morning. She had forgone the pumps she normally wore, choosing high heel boots in anticipation of the weather. The knee-high boots had a practical heel that steadied her as she made her way down the embankment of the Charles River near Back Bay off Storrow Drive.

Alek Karam was dead. First responders from the Boston Police Department called Search and Rescue to retrieve the body from the Charles River. His death in itself was not a tragedy. The man was an intrinsic psychopath. He was; however, the only link Detective Mills had to a conviction on Zuhair Hakim. Alek was the cleaner for Zuhair, a small-time drug dealer with an affinity for little girls.

Regina Mills had been working the case for over three months. She overextended herself and her limited resources to build a case against Hakim. She had constant surveillance on the drug lord and club owner. She waited for Karam to _resolve another problem_ for his boss. The Detective had two dead underaged girls, with no physical evidence linking their deaths to Hakim. He was the last person to be seen with the girls before their deaths. They died from an overdose. The drug was distributed in Hakim's night club in the fashion district. The Detective could place the girls at the club, with Hakim two nights before their disappearance. The autopsy confirmed that the girls were raped and sodomised. They had a high blood alcohol level and enough methamphetamine to kill five people.

Their bodies were disposed of, in a large trash dumpster in a different area. Refuge removal was once a week, and it was by pure accident that their bodies were discovered. They had been dead for eight days, laying at the bottom of the dumpster, covered in cooking oil waste and fast food. It was a practical and effective way to ensure any DNA would be compromised. It took Regina two months to solve the riddle of their deaths. Since then she had surveillance on Karam. Her instincts told her the depravity of Hakim was not an isolated incident. She would wait.

As the gurney with the body passed the Detective and her partner, Daniel Colter, she let out a sigh of frustration. More girls would die. Her only link was dead. The tragedy of it did not escape her. It was one of the dreadful parts of being a cop. To wait for another life to end before you could stop the bastard that was responsible. 

She returned with Daniel to their office on Schroeder Plaza. Sargent Detective Daniel Colter knew better than to pacify his partner. When she made her way to the IT department to look at more footage on her suspect, he did not even try to stop her.

***

"Wait! There, go back?" Regina's, clear husked voice stopped Jasmin Shamir, one of their IT Analysts. It always amazed the quiet girl that the Detective could spot an incident in the mix-up video material that was collected. 

She indicated to Jasmin the exact clip she wanted to see. Her deep brown eyes focused on a background scene. Regina coached her until the woman with Hakim's bodyguard was in focus on the screen. Regina looked at the girl critically. She was tall with flaming auburn hair cut into a Chinese bob. The girl had the impressive bodyguard's hand in a wrist breaking grip while downing a shooter by the bar. The girl was older than what was Hakim's taste, but she clearly took exception to something to justify the aggression.

"Can you please print that for me Jasmin and can you cross-check if she is in any other clips?" The young officer confirmed that she would. Jasmin was one of the few people Detective Mills respected and treated as an equal despite her rank. Her relationship with fellow detectives, except for Daniel, was tolerable at best.

Officers, in general, steered clear of her. Regina Mills was as deadly with words as she was beautiful. She was an excellent detective, her mannerisms, perfection and intellect; however, made it near impossible to work with her. She was grateful towards Daniel. He started to partner with her when no other cop would, nine years before.

***

The Sergeant Detective from Homicide that responded to the 10-57 was a cop with an excellent reputation. It was his partner, the notorious _Evil Queen_ , which Patrol Officers steered clear off. The woman was as cold as she was stunning. She received the ominous nick-name when her former partner was killed during their second year, working together. The woman broke procedure. She went after a suspect alone. Back-up was a few minutes out. She got her man, but her partner was shot. He bled out on the scene. The young officer did everything she could to save his life. No one remembered that. They only recalled his small children asking where their Daddy was.

After the event, no one wanted to work with her. She went through a string of partners. Until Sergeant Detective Daniel Colter told her to ride with him one morning. Daniel expected the ostracised Officer to be timid and reserved. Like many before him, the strong-headed woman took him by surprise. Neither his rank nor her position on the force kept her from taking charge. She was meticulous and thorough. Daniel worked with her for six months, before he referred to Regina Mills as his partner. It was a validation for her that she was doing her job.

Regina excelled under Daniel's mentorship. Detective Mills worked for her shield. She was one of the youngest women ever to become a Detective in the State of Massachusetts. However, Daniel knew she should have received it sooner. One mistake cost her a well-deserved promotion.

Their friendship slowly developed over the few years since he reluctantly partnered with her. She was private. He respected that. More so, he appreciated the fact that she worked her ass off. Mills was an old-money family in Boston. Her connections alone would have assured her any position she wanted. Instead, Regina Mills worked for what she desired. Daniel often wondered how much of Regina's lousy reputation was due to the media, likely influenced by Congresswoman Cora Mills. He knew that mother and daughter had different views on Regina's career choices. It made Daniel like her just that bit more.

***

"Detective!" Jasmin called her excitedly. She held a folder in her hand. Regina knew she found the woman in Zuhair's nightclub that was in the altercation with the bodyguard. Her smile was contagious, and Regina gave her a rare one of her own. As she opened the folder, she frowned.

The woman had a wrap-sheet a mile long. She asked Jasmin to tag the woman to see where she fitted into Zuhair's organisation. She might be of use, now that the cleaner was dead.

***

Regina filed the information away as she made her way back to her desk in the corner of the bullpen. There was a post-it on her desk, instructing her that the Captain wanted to see her.

A bad day was instantly made worse during her conversation with the Captain.

There were several mysteries regarding Detective Mills. The look currently in her eyes was not such an unknown entity. Numerous Officers moved out of her way. When those brown eyes turned as dark as they currently were, Detective Mills was about to eviscerate or emasculate the object of her fury. To all in the vicinity. It came as a surprise when she stopped in front of her partner's work station.

"Why?" Her voice was a low husky sound as she tried to keep the emotion out. The hoarseness and the brimming tears in those expressive eyes presented aside to the usually stoic detective that none of the men in the Precinct was familiar with, not even her partner Daniel Colter.

"Regina, it is time for me to move on." She gave him a glare that would cause most men to piss themselves. She walked away at a speed that made Daniel cringe. A mystery to all the men that had seen her do it. One would think that after being her partner for nine years, he would be used to watch her moved rapidly in her four-inch heels — the tight, pristine pencil skirt, delightfully hugging her body. It was motion and curves to watch. A small smile appeared on Daniel's face. He had watched Regina Mills take down a suspect more than once dressed precisely as she was now. Running, slamming into a man. All in heels and a skirt, without her makeup smearing a single streak. Regina was an exquisite woman. She was an incredible cop. Fearless, and yet, the most challenging detective to have as a partner.

Daniel sat heavily in his chair. He knew better than to run after her. It would not have mattered if he told her of the promotion. He was forty years old. He had been a detective for ten. He was getting tired of running after dangerous men, telling kind-hearted people that their children were dead. He had seen enough, lived through too much. When the position of Lieutenant Detective in another District opened, the Sergeant Detective applied. His record was upstanding. His mannerisms, the way he conducted himself, made Daniel likeable to his superiors. He participated in the political games when it was required — the perfect candidate. With that observation in mind, Regina was good for his career. She was a brilliant Detective with a degree in Criminal Psychology. Her political connections were far-reaching. If she considered to utilise them, Regina could have been a Lieutenant herself. She displayed no interest in such advancements. Her passion and ambitions lingered towards another direction. Frequently the detective's primary motivation in her life seemed to be adherence towards the exact opposite of what her parents expected from her. After four years as a detective, she did not even consider acquiring her rank for Sergeant. Daniel knew it was the ambition of Congresswoman Mills of Massachusetts for her daughter. With her mother in the House of Representatives and her father, an esteemed Judge, Regina's influence could make her prominent, on her own she was outstanding. Regina wanted her life to have meaning. She possessed her own ambitions. It included furthering her education by completing her master's degree in Criminal Psychology, having a child of her own and doing something that would upset her mother more than being a Boston cop.

***

Regina walked four city blocks before she felt her composure returned. The tears were still brimming in her eyes. She stopped to gather her emotions. Daniel Colter was one of a small number of people that understood her. He would remain in Boston. It was, however, not the same. Working with the man for nine years, she did not need to quantify her decisions to him any longer. Daniel was not intimidated by her status, motivations or acuteness. Most of all, he understood her temperaments. She had no desire to instruct a new partner. Captain George Spencer despised her as a person. As a detective, he appreciated her high conviction rate. That was one of the few reasons why he tolerated her questionable attitude. Detective Mills unnerved him, undermined him on more than one occasion. Generally, she made it near impossible to live up to the standards she had set for herself. As a young captain in the BPD, he still had more to prove than other Captains. Regina Mills understood his position, as a female detective, favouring homicide. They, however, could not find common ground. Their relationship was strained but respectful in front of others. Daniel often served as a buffer between them. Daniel was a safeguard between her and most people. It was not that she was inconsiderate; she merely had no contempt for incompetence.

Since she joined the Police Department, she had been a witness to the preconception, misconceived ideas and bias towards women and black people alike. Jasmin, the department's IT Analyst, was one of the people she would consider a friend. Regina watched the back-lash assumptions of 9/11 still imposed on the woman, five years after the fact when she joined the Police Department. Few knew she was Hindu. Not that it should have mattered if she was of Islamic faith either. Offices treated her with contempt due to her name. Regina's soft spot for French protected her most of the time. It was, however a treacherous path for them.

Outside of the Police Department, she had one other friend. A Medical Examiner for Boston. Ruby Lucas. She met Ruby while they were students at Boston University. She was one of those people that could have been a rocket scientist. Her IQ was outside of the normal range of measurement. This enabled the outgoing woman to study two degrees concurrently. She completed her PhD while studying four subjects in Forensic Pathology. During her residency, she continued her education. Completing her second degree two years later. She enrolled for a Philosophical degree, for her amusement. Philosophy and History were her hobbies.

Regina completed her education as a summa cum laude student, nevertheless Red, as she was known, outshined Regina in intellect, a rare occurrence. Red became the friend Regina had longed for her entire life. Someone that could stimulate her intellectually. They often exchanged views regarding a case. Regina could keep up with the doctor's forensic anatomy explanation of injuries or wounds that left most detectives clueless. On nights when the second bottle of expensive red wine was opened, Red began a philosophical discussion. Regina enjoyed these conceptual conversations. They would often disagree. Pitching theories at each other. Counter-arguing, quoting Aristotle and different great ideologies. Regina frequently thought her friendship with Red was the only thing that kept her sane. A little normality in her turbulent world.

***

As a child, she had these kinds of conversations with her parents. By the time she turned sixteen, she had realised their subject matters had consisted of two schools of thought, politics and law. At that age, Regina had developed a distaste for both subject cases. The knowledge was invaluable. It assisted her significantly during her career. It was merely not her passion. Her parents did not hide their disappointment when, after completing her degree, Regina joined the Police Academy. 

The then, lobbyist and established Advocate for Boston viewed their daughter's choice as an utter waste of her potential. Her mother continued to encourage her to ascertain herself. Cora Mills had a strategy for her only child's future. When Regina advanced to the rank of Detective, the Sunday afternoon lunch discussion was an outlined plan for what steps were required from Regina. Either to become the next D.A or Mayor of Boston. From there, Congress would be open to her. Regina was too well mannered and refined to roll her eyes.

Entering law enforcement was, however, not the greatest disappointment the couple had in their child. Regina became a detective at twenty-seven, which made her one of the youngest female detectives in the State. If her parents were proud, they did not indicate it. After a long night, entertaining a self-righteous Public Prosecutor, _with a promising future_ , her mother's description of the arrogant, insufferable man. Regina bid him a good night. He requested her number. She smiled, sweetly at him.

"I am certain that my mother will contact you once more."

She did not look back to see him smile, impressed with himself. Or when he took out his cell phone to contact the District Representative to report on the excellent date with her daughter. Cora was immensely pleased. Therefore, when Regina rang the bell of their manor an hour later, it came as a huge surprise that her daughter reported the contradictory of the night out. Regina spewed her disdain for an hour before she dropped the bomb. "Can you please stop these unprompted setups with these spoiled men?" Her mother falsified her hurt at the comment.

"Regina, you are practically a spinster. You need a husband, stability, someone to take care of you!"

"You mean I need a man that can further my career!" She accused. Cora Mills glided towards her daughter. Holding her by the shoulders.

"That would certainly help Darling." She uttered the words so sweetly that Regina felt the bile burn in her throat.

"I have someone, Mother. She is everything I need." The shock on her mother's face made her smile. "Yes, Congresswoman, I fuck women!"

Cora slapped her daughter with force through the face, leaving a red handprint that immediately appeared on her cheek. It was not the first time that the benevolent politician hit her daughter.

"You will break this relationship off! Now!" Cora was not used to anyone opposing her. Even her headstrong daughter knew when to stop pushing. This night was different.

"I have listened to you all my life. How to behave what to wear. How to network and carry myself as a lady, as a Mills! You have dictated my existence! You told me my entire life what was good for me. No more Mother. I am happy for the first time in a long time. I will not let you destroy this!"

This time, in her fury, the Congresswoman struck her daughter severe enough, for Regina to nearly fall. Cora's voice took on an ominous tone. "Is it that Doctor?" She spat.

Regina shook her head as she wiped a trickle of blood off her lip. She looked at her fingers. Her mind quieted down. When she looked back at her mother, Cora came face to face with a look in Regina's eyes that she was not familiar with in that instance. She would perceive the same look often after that night, but at the time, she did not know what it meant. Regina adjusted her posture. She stood impassive in front of the woman she no longer feared, no longer cared for, her or her opinion — contempt in her much darker eyes.

"No Mother, it is not Doctor Lucas. You do not know this woman. She would not live up to your standards, but she is mine, and that is all I need."

"Get, out, of, my, house, you homosexual deviant!" The epithet stung. Far more than what Regina would ever have shown this woman. She merely stood taller.

"I prefer gay-lady, but whatever blows your hair back Congresswoman," Regina added mockingly, then she left. The manor was her childhood home. She departed without looking back. Her father tried to stop her. He asked what the argument was about. However, one expression from his wife made him retract from his daughter. He received the same look of disdain from Regina. It caused him enough pain to look away. In the large reception area, Regina heard her mother one more time.

"And never set a foot back here!" Regina stopped her stride. She did not turn around. She only gathered the last of her resolve and answered.

"I was not planning on it, Congresswoman." The words came out so composed. Then she continued to walk proudly, the tears streaming down her face.

The Congresswoman found out who the woman in Regina's life was within a day. Louise was a school teacher. Undoubtedly not a position Cora deemed of any importance. The Congresswoman threatened the teacher's career, outing her at the school, then paid her ten thousand dollars to break up with Regina. She did. Regina thought they were happy. That their almost year-long relationship was strong enough to withstand Cora Mills, she was mistaken. As her lover cried while breaking up with her for no apparent reason, Regina asked one question.

"Did my mother pay you to do this, Louise?" The teacher could not hide her shock that Regina would know this. The ardent woman nodded her head with a sad expression.

"You made your choice. I will return in two days. By then, I want you gone."

She lost two homes in one week. She lost a lot more than that, she realised later, looking back. Her mother destroyed her confidence. In her world, everyone could be bought. Love had a price. Regina promised herself that the lesson would never repeat itself. The emotionally distant woman became expressively cold. The impassive woman never discussed her personal life with Daniel. There was never a requirement for it. She stayed at his house, while she cried in a way he had never expected her to cry. Regina resolved to became horribly intoxicated the first evening, telling him the disturbing tale, then waited for his rejection.

The gentle man immediately held his arms open for her. As her painful sobs raked her body, he commented dryly that he was a Democrat, that he never liked her mother in the first instance. The words made her laugh through her tears. He accepted her and consoled her. It was the only validation she needed. It was this bond, this reason that she could not fathom why he was leaving her now.

It was during that same week that she told Red. Red rolled her eyes.

"Seriously? You did not think I knew that from the moment we met?" Regina was speechless. Red gave her the most devious smile she had ever seen on her friend's face.

"I am completely straight… but if you ever want to…" She let the words drawl for a moment.

"Let's say experiment with this, in the name of science. I'm your girl." Regina's eyes grew wide. Then she smirked.

"Fine, you, me, gay club tonight?" She lifted a challenging eyebrow. She knew Red was not able to resist the temptation.

It let to one of the wildest nights with a stranger Regina had ever experienced. The stranger caught her eyes almost the moment she and Red walked in. After a few shots of Tequila, Regina was brave enough to make her way over to the gangster-type, tall woman with the black Panama hat.

The memory of _her soldier_ , as she called the woman, always calmed her. A night of public sex, seduction, apprehension and oh god! The sex. Regina mostly picked the woman because she was the complete opposite of her ex. She wore black. A black and blue bandana under the Panama hat and the same design tied around her right wrist. It was her clothes that made Regina think she was in a gang. Only after their second round of orgasms in a quiet, dark corner did she lay her hand on the stranger's chest. She felt the hardness under her palm and instantly knew what it was.

"You're a soldier?" The intense eyes burned back into Regina's dark once. 

"Marine, but yes."

"Then I do thank you for your _service_ soldier." She said it softly. _Her soldier_ understood the sultry meaning. It led to their next make-out session. Leaving her breathless, sated and yet, so hungry for more.

"Can I see you again?" The woman gave her a sad smile.

"I ship out in two days." Regina touched her face, kissed her softly.

"Please be safe?" Regina was confident that she fell in love that night. No other woman ever measured up to _her soldier_. She never saw the woman again.

Regina continued to go out. She quenched her body's needs. In her mind, she created a safe place for her heart. In her mind, she had _her soldier_. It was all she needed.

****

Regina looked up to the sky. She was wiping her tears. She was not religious, but every time she thought about her, the detective would pray that _her soldier_ was still safe. It has been seven years, yet she could not shake the Marine from her mind. When she closed her eyes, she could hear the stranger's last words to her. She heard it clearly as if it was said to her only the night before… Regina inhaled. She was calm now.

Her cell phone rang. The caller ID was Spencer. "Yes, Captain?"

"I would have liked to discuss this in person, but there is a body in Dorchester Heights. The D.A assigned your team. Do you want to work with Colter until his transfer, or must I assign you a new team leader?" The man, on the other end, dreaded her answer. Daniel was not merely the team leader, he was Regina's partner. The Captain dreaded assigning her a new partner overall. The chance of Detective Mills killing several detectives before Daniel transferred was a high possibility.

"No, Sir. I will continue to work with Sergeant Detective Colter until then." George Spencer was relieved.

"Fine, get this done." She always did. However, the man insisted on instructing that after every conversation.

Regina pocketed her mobile, walked back to the Precinct at a slower pace. Daniel was waiting for her on the steps by the entrance.

"Am I forgiven?" He asked, hopeful as Regina opened the driver door to their assigned patrol car.

"You are the excrement of the Earth." She remarked uncharacteristically. It told him all he needed to know.


	2. Rip Taylor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all!  
> I have rewritten the first four chapters three times - eish. Therefore if my timeline is a bit wonky and confusing, please point it out to me for correction?  
> Comments are welcome. Enjoy!

Rip Taylor looked at the man and shrugged. It was her disinterest that compelled Zuhair Hakim to look at her more closely. She downed another shooter at the bar even though it was only after ten in the morning.

“I don’t kill.” She informed him casually. 

“There is a reason why my name is Rip.” Zuhair inclined his head. 

He went through a lot of trouble finding information on the woman, but it was worth it. Rip worked for a small-time loan-shark who did not have any problems with payments. The woman had a reputation, deadly and attractive. She had no loyalties, no agendas, her only rules were that she did not kill, nor did she get involved. From what Zuhair estimated, most people would prefer death to a meeting with Rip Taylor. His former bodyguard could attribute to this. The man’s wrist was broken in two places. Rip disabled the man without so much as breaking a sweat. Deadly and beautiful indeed.

Her duties were simple, protect Zuhair and see to it that his interests were protected. She did not need to get her hands dirty. Others would pick up the girls or dispose of them, as they did with Alek. Zuhair gave her a place to stay. His club was in the fashion district. A warehouse that he converted. He fixed it up, utilising the first two floors as a club, the third floor served as accommodation for a few employees and space for his other activities. The rest he used as offices.

Simple life, Rip would sleep and eat there. Zuhair took care of all her expenses. The moment he moved, she was at his side. Her long strides keeping up with the man. Zuhair Hakim had a flair about him that Rip appreciated. Always dressed in business suits, perfect tie to match his complexion, he came across as a businessman, rather than a drug dealer who was expanding his business rapidly.

Rip’s reputation preceded her, to Zuhair’s amusement. During the first month of their business relationship, he noticed that her mere presence deterred certain people. When she escorted him to the docks for a shipment, his suppliers watched her with fear.

He questioned her about it later that night. As usual, she shrugged, explaining that she had been working for many people before. Sooner or later, everyone crossed a line she was not comfortable with. Zuhair knew the quiet bodyguard had a moral code. Rip saw killing as a waste. Instilling fear was a much more desirable action. It suited him. She protected him, that was it. She made it clear that she did not care for any participation in his enterprise. The latter provision was what made her appealing. She had no interest in his business, how he went about it or who he involved.

It plainly amused the man. She was stunning, a particular problem when it came to most men. Zuhair liked his girls young, so he had no interest in the woman, who like her own girls older.

It seemed to be the perfect relationship. Since Zuhair branched out to the east coast, picking Boston for his operation, he encountered several problems. With Rip at his side, his supply chain steadied. The fear the woman instilled in everyone that knew her reputation was astounding. Men he had dealt with for some time completely changed their attitude when they became aware that Rip Taylor was working for him now.

It made the man boulder, he approached a business relationship that was previously entirely unavailable for him.

Rip was at his side in the quietness of the club during the day when Will Scarlet walked in for a business meeting. Zuhair was charming, shaking the man’s hand and inviting him to a table when the son of the Irish mob boss in Boston stiffened. Zuhair’s dark eyes flicked between the man and his bodyguard. 

Rip was playing with one of her favourite knives. One of a twin-set Karambit. The drug dealer knew what the woman could do with the seemingly harmless, small weapon. When she got up, Zuhair tensed. Rip walked to the bar and grabbed a bottle of Irish whiskey with two glasses. She placed the bottle wordlessly on the table. Without prompt, she and Scarlet took a seat. She poured them each a shot.

“Been a while Psycho Bitch.” Scarlet reflected before he swallowed the drink. Rip followed him and instantly filled the glasses. Zuhair took a seat, not knowing the play, but he was confident that these two had a history.

“What are you doing here, Will?” Rip enquired without glancing at her boss. Will Scarlet sat back in his seat.

“Could ask you the same question?” Her green eyes pierced into his. She swallowed another shot. 

“You can see yourself out.” She stood up. Before she left, she resolutely stared at Zuhair. “You crossed a line. Get my pay ready, I’m leaving.”

Zuhair looked from her to Scarlet.

“Rip wait!” She turned to him slowly, a raised eyebrow. He could not believe that he was about to blow off a business deal in favour of his protection.

“We are all friends here.” He pacified her quickly. She glanced at Scarlet, then to Zuhair.

“No Zuhair, Will and I are friends. You are my boss. I do not mix business with pleasure.” She walked off.

Will relaxed instantly, taking the bottle of Irish and pouring himself another drink.

“Feisty, isn’t she?” He questioned the other man. Zuhair frowned.

“Bad blood between you?” Will laughed at the question.

“No, it is her way of protecting me. Rip does not like it when I get involved with scum.” Will stood up. 

“We will not be doing business, Mr Hakim. Good luck with that one.” He added with a smirk as he left.

Rip came back half an hour later, her stuff packed. Zuhair pleaded with her. He knew doing business with the Irish was a longshot at best, they had their own way, their own interests. Finally, she relented. Zuhair had to ask, however. “He said you are protecting him?” Rip shrugged. At times her silence was frustrating. She narrowed her eyes when she answered. 

“Certain bridges one does not burn. Will Scarlet is that bridge.” It did not ease Zuhair’s mind, in fact, it made him immensely cautious. Rip Taylor was a dangerous woman, but Rip in association with the Irish Mob was terrifying. Zuhair knew one thing, if he ever crossed this woman, his life would be worthless.

***

Regina Mills watched the interaction on the surveillance in the situation room. Her investigation merged with another investigation into Zuhair. She was now part of a task force. The lead detective was from VICE. Her murder investigation overlapped with their drug, prostitution and money laundering operation. 

Detective Sean Herman took the lead since he had been investigating Zuhair Hakim longer than she had. Detective Mills was called into the situation room, only when things seemed to get heated. They had a SWAT unit on permanent standby for this operation. Regina continuously felt like they all knew more about the developments in her case than she did. It was not uncommon. Her demeanour made it difficult for others to get close to her; _what did she expect, open arms on a task force?_

The one thing that continuously unnerved her was the supervision of the Lieutenant. August Booth was a great cop. The difference between him and most other Lieutenants was that fact. Others used the position for political gain or networking for promotions; Booth was a cop. His presence would not have bothered her as much if his actions were not so suspicious. When she requested to bring Rip Taylor in, he flatly refused.

Regina had the woman on assault, she believed she could turn her, she needed someone on the inside to replace the information flow she received from Alek. Alek was close to rolling over. As heartless as the bastard was, he had a distaste for killing when it came to children, or minors, as the two murdered girls were referred to. 

There was also the matter of Alek’s murder. Regina was sure that her reluctant confidential informant’s alliance with her was leaked by a cop. She did not know if it was intentional or by accident, but the facts pointed in that direction. She and Alek never met, he would call her once in a while, reporting that Zuhair had a new girl, that was it. Usually, the girls would not land up dead, but something went wrong. It was her job to find the cause and who was involved. That was were Alek came in, he was the apparent killer, but he denied it, telling Detective Mills that he only disposed of them. That was the shitty part of her work, she let Alek go in favour of catching the correct culprit. Alek ensured two people landed up in hospital after she released him. Then a few weeks later, she watched as they pulled his body from the river. This case was a mess. The Captain assigned her a new partner, and she thought the man was useless. She did not even bother to inform him that she was now in the situation room, looking at surveillance.

“Can someone please inform me what just occurred?” Her colleagues looked around. When all eyes landed on Detective Herman, he let out an elaborated sigh. 

“For this case, Scarlet is a no-go zone.” She frowned at the statement. Regina knew that GIU has been after Connor Scarlet for ages. They had more than one operation with the FBI in the past to investigate the organised crime family. Will Scarlet disappeared for years, when he returned to Boston, GIU was hot on him, until recently. Mills knew he was approachable. The Irish mob liked their business quiet, any new dealers would be potential ripples that they did not encourage. He could be swayed to take out Zuhair. Regina understood interdepartmental politics, but there was something about this case that did not sit right with her.

***

It was after midnight when Regina got a call. She dressed and speeded her way across the city to the Boston Police Headquarters. Sean shook his head when she walked in. She made it to the precinct in half an hour, he knew he woke her up, but she looked like she would at eight in the morning. Dressed to perfection in her tailored power suit.

“What is the matter?” Her keen eyes searched the monitors. The club was alive, there was no sign of Zuhair or his bodyguard. They had not been able to get surveillance anywhere else in the building. She knew there was an apartment across the street where officers were watching the third floor of the building. They had sound, for that floor and the one above it. Regina was also aware that there were several officers in and out of the club at irregular intervals. The place was secure.

“We received an alert.” Regina watched the other detectives as the Lieutenant informed her. This was not news to them. “Who is responsible for informing you?” She questioned, confident that her enquiry would remain unanswered.

“

That’s not important. What is important is that Zuhair is on the third floor with a girl and her boyfriend.” Sean confirmed SWAT’s readiness. Several other offices in the club reported in. The crew that was in the apartment building could not observe due to the blinds in the office they were focused on being close, but the consistent murmur of Zuhair’s voice came through on one of the monitors recording his actions. There was another rapid sound that Regina could not pin-point.

“Fuck,” Sean exclaimed as the tension in his body became evident.

_“Zuhair, let the boy be. Even without my assistance, I think he has seen the error of his ways.”_ Regina recognised the relaxed manner of the bodyguard through the sound link. She sounded disinterested.

 _“She is my girl!”_ They heard Zuhair shout in anger, then the clear sound of gunshots.

Sean called everyone to move in while he cursed profusely. Their entire case just went to fuck. Regina made out a girl crying hysterically, the bodyguard’s voice telling Zuhair just how much he had fucked up at that moment, then another shot. More hysterical screaming from the girl. Regina felt the atmosphere in the situation room tense dramatically. The Lieutenant had to order Sean to remain in his seat. He took over, barking orders to the SWAT commander. It felt like hours before Regina heard the SWAT team breakdown the door. She listened to their commands. There were more shots fired, silence, then the gravel voice of the Sargent calling an all clear.

“Lets go!” Lieutenant Booth ordered.

By the time the task force entered the scene, there were a dozen police vehicles, two ambulances and the local media. Regina watched as Zuhair Hakim was dragged to a police car. His hands were ripped tied behind his back. Paper bags over them. A procedure to ensure they could do a GSR test on him later. Then the bodyguard was in sight. 

She was less co-operative while two SWAT officers struggled against her resistance. There was blood on her face. Regina looked at her in disgust, estimating that she must have been close when Zuhair pulled the trigger. After a while, she followed Sean to the office where the murder took place. There were two dead, a man in his early twenties and one of Zuhair’s men. Regina could play the scene out in her mind, relating the audio information, they had to the crime scene before her. The young man was shot in the head with a heavy calibre. There was almost nothing left of the back of his head. The rest of the night and early morning, Regina functioned on automatic, doing what she did best, operating a crime scene. She was half relieved the other members of the team left her with the shooting while they looked for the narcotics and additional information pertaining to Zuhair’s operation.

The detective was tired when she made her way back to the station, but she had a witness to interrogate. Rip Taylor had been processed. Her clothes were removed, her face cleared of blood. She sat in the interrogation room with her eyes closed in a county jail jumpsuit. Her hands cuffed to the table. Regina asked the officer who was guarding her a few questions before she entered.

“Good morning Miss Taylor, my name is Detective Mills.” 

Regina placed the file she had on her suspect on the small table, then studied the woman before her for a moment. She seemed relatively calm, the dark, overapplied makeup she had on that night smeared over her eyes and cheek, none the less it did not deter from her attractiveness. Strangely it made her seem more vulnerable. She still did not move, sitting with her head back, her eyes closed. When Regina spoke again, the woman interrupted her. 

“I asked for my lawyer when I got here.”

“Yes,” Regina smiled. “It seems that Mr Bancroft is disassociating himself from your case.” Rip snorted. “If you like, we can appoint a Lawyer for you?” This time Rip opened her eyes.

“Do I look fucking stupid?” Regina felt a shiver run down her spine. There was no light in this woman’s eyes. From the report in front of her, she knew the woman was twenty-seven. Her eyes look older as if she had already seen too much of the world.

“I can read you the Maranda rights again?” Regina offered. She received a half-smile for her efforts.

“What do you want to know?” The bodyguard offered. Regina assessed her, she knew it would not be that easy. 

“Tell me what happened tonight?” Rip leaned back and closed her eyes once more.

“Ask Amy.” Regina held her frustrations in. Amy Grant was the minor Zuhair picked up, the unidentified man was assumed to be her boyfriend. The girl was in a state and was recovering at Mass General. She was hysterical when SWAT breached the office, holding her dead boyfriend.

“I need a fresh perspective,” Regina stated. “Your view?” Rip did not respond. Her attitude did not surprise the detective.

Regina continued, systematically explaining Rip’s wrap-sheet in front of her, telling Miss Taylor what would happen to her with a murder charge added to it, then Regina proposed the events of the night to her. Placing Rip as the shooter. The woman did not respond. She did not deny her involvement or tried to defend herself as the detective painted her black as the prime suspect. The one-sided interview was frustrating Regina. Rip Taylor did not give any indication that she was concerned with a murder charge.

***

From the other side of the interview room, Sean Herman looked at the interrogation.

“What’s up, Chief?” An officer asked as he joined Sean.

“Looks like she fell asleep and Mills is not aware.” Officer Neal Cassidy laughed. 

“Sounds about right.” He pressed the button for the intercom.

“Hey Psycho Bitch, wake up!”

“Fuck you Asshole.” The instant response came. It made him laugh uncontrollably as Sean shook his head and indicated to Neal to follow him to the room. Regina looked up, irritated that her interrogation was interrupted. The suspect moved so fast that both detectives were taken by surprise. She was up, her tall frame bent because her hands were cuffed to the table. She raged at Herman. Regina looked on in shock as Rip flung the table towards Herman. The sheer strength it took to lift it while cuffed to it frightened Herman.

“You fucking, ass dick, retard!” She tried to lift the table once more when the officer that Regina did not know placed a hand on her shoulder. She shook it off, but Regina became aware that the woman instantly calmed at his touch. The officer took out keys to unlock Rip’s hands. Regina was about to protest when the woman spoke.

“About fucking time, what took you so long Asshole?” Neal snickered as she rubbed her wrists that were already starting to bruise.

“You left us with quite the mess. I’m tired cleaning up after you Swan.” The comment started a fresh flood of curses towards Herman. Rip flatly accused him of killing the boy.

“Why the fuck did you not breech when I called the first time?” Herman lowered his head. It wasn’t his call.

“That is my fault.” Lieutenant Booth stated when he walked in. Regina observed the interaction with interest. Lieutenant Booth enlightened her on the matter. She already placed the pieces together. Rip was their CI.

“Detective Regina Mills, Homicide, meet Officer Swan, VICE.” Swan nodded and stood up, several vertebras clicked in. 

“Swan is one of our best undercover cops.” Regina could not suppress her astonishment. This was the part she was not privy to and the reason why they received an alert before anything had happened that morning. Regina scrutinised the woman with new eyes. There was an aspect of the case and the undercover cop that twisted her gut. No police officer, no matter how good they were, could pull off what this one did. 

“Stupid fuck shot that boy point-blank.” She looked at Booth with disappointed eyes.

“There was nothing I could do. He just shot him.” Regina heard the regret.

“You need to see where he gets his guns. Came into the office with that funky looking Desert Eagle two days ago. Told the useless fuck guns were overkill. Hardly anything left of the kids face.” 

Regina could make out the officer’s distress, there was a complete personality change. The animated cop debriefing her as appose to the apathetic suspect. Her accent changed from Boston to a Mid-west lake. During the debriefing, she ordered officer Cassidy to get her _stuff_ , he smiled, obviously knowing what she referred to. Regina watched as the undercover cop downed two energy drinks, curtesy of Cassidy. When she was done, Sean patted her on the back. 

“Get some sleep Swan. You can tell us the rest tomorrow when you debrief the Captain.”

***

Swan looked entirely different the next morning in a crisp uniform. Regina bit her lip as she assessed the cop while listening to the report in the Captain’s office. Spencer kept quiet the entire time, seemingly used to the cursed phrases that the officer used during the feedback. Swan related everything and she supported her facts with the recorded conversations they had. When the brief was over, Regina stayed behind. 

She needed to know why she was excluded from all the facts during the investigation. Spencer explained that Swan’s cover was set, they did not want to do anything to compromise it. _Rip Taylor_ was a persona that could be used again. The Detective then told Spencer in her professional opinion, that no cop was that good. There were too many psychological markers _Rip Taylor_ displayed that could not be an act. His brow creased in question. She explained the psychosis behind _Rip Taylor_ , it correlated to the point with the profile they gave Swan of who _Rip Taylor_ was. It reminded Spencer once more of how valuable Regina could be if only she could work in a team.

“What are you implying Detective Mills? That Officer Swan is a criminal?” She shook her head. Explaining to her captain that with the trades she noticed in _Rip_ , there was no way that a rational, sane mind could portray those instincts. Spencer smiled.

“No one ever said Swan was sane.” He dismissed the detective with instruction to speak to the ADA that was assigned to prosecute Hakim.

Regina could not get much information on the undercover cop. The few men that knew her seemed overprotective. Regina could not picture the woman needing any protection. It did not matter; however, Officer Emma Swan provided her with everything she needed. She could close the cases of the girls, Alek Karam and the boy, Justin Harrington. Zuhair Hakim was awaiting trial for four murders. GIU and VICE confiscated drugs, guns and false immigration papers. Overall it was a win.

***

“Hey Doc, what you got for me?” Swan asked as she entered the autopsy room of Doctor Lucas. She handed the raven-haired Medical Examiner a health-smoothie as she waited for a reply.

“Thanks for this,” She held the smoothie up. The M.E knew she would be another few hours, and she skipped lunch. The young officer’s infrequent visits always came with food.

“This one is a mystery if I have ever seen one.” She walked over to the refrigerators that held the cases she was working on. She explained the circumstances of the victim while Swan followed her.

“Well-loved, caring Minister was found dead in his house. The guy was decapitated, staked through the heart and violated.” Swan was looking at the fact sheet of the autopsy.

“Reverend Simon Green? Minister by day vampire by night?” The officer asked with mischief. Doctor Lucas was doing her a favour by letting her examine the bodies. She liked VICE, but it was taxing on her system. It was too easy for her to get lost in the chaos of her undercover persona. She wanted a spot in homicide. Learning about death and looking at victims were expanding her understanding. It also helped with the Master’s Degree she was desperate to complete.

Ruby pulled the fridge open where the Minister’s body was kept. She removed the sheet covering him and started to explain the injuries. Swan was quiet. When the forensic pathologist indicated the wound on the man’s side, Swan questioned strained.

“Was a bite taken out of his liver?” Doctor Lucas stopped. Her eyes narrowed. 

“Yes, how did you know?” She saw tears in the officer’s eyes which confused her. Swan did not pepper her with the usual enthusiastic questions. She was always composed, no matter how difficult the death was. She had an almost clinical approach to the dead.

“Did he suffer?” Her next question took the doctor entirely by surprise.

“He did. The anal penetration ripped the rectum, and the removal of his testicles was post mortem.” Red explained while watching Swan. She then smiled down at the body. 

“Good, the fuck deserved that.” She turned to walk.

“Swan, I do not care who you think you are, no one, and I mean no one disrespects a victim in my autopsy room!” She could hear the anger in the doctor’s voice, she did not care.

“That,” She pointed back at the body. “Is not a victim.”

Swan hurried to her bike outside the building, she needed to get back at the precinct. She saw that the case was assigned to Regina Mills. Swan did not look forward to an encounter with the woman. They were very different, and she doubted that the Detective would view the murder as a blessing to the world.

Regina saw someone standing before her murder board as she entered the homicide bullpen. She did not recognise the officer.

“Can I assist you?” Swan rolled her eyes at hearing the detective’s pristine question.

“Any suspects in this case?” The officer asked without looking towards the approaching detective. She walked around her desk to confront the visitor, their eyes met. The detective inhaled sharply. It was only the small, sideways smile that told her it was Emma Swan. Her hair was longer and blonde. Where the woman had a lifeless look in her eyes before, her hazel-green seemed more profound now, alive. 

“Officer Swan.” She stated due to a lack of words. That had never been an issue with her. She always knew what to state. From her casual stance, Swan pointed to the board.

“Yes, no, we do not have any suspects.” Swan exhaled deeply. This was an instance where her worlds collided, and for a moment, she was unsure what to do.

“When is the funeral?” She questioned instead, trying to make up her mind. 

“Thursday,” Regina responded with caution. The officer nodded towards her, then pushed herself off the desk she was leaning against.

“I’ll see you then.” There was no further explanation.


	3. The Motive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently, I can spell Reverend three different ways without my spell checker picking it up. Mark Twain did say: I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way." His argument was that it showed a lack of imagination.   
> My imagination might be on par, but it makes reading difficult. I do apologise. English is not my first language.

Swan would have preferred to be anywhere other than Reverend Green’s memorial service. She tried to keep her ire down as people sang his praises. She was sitting near the back, Regina and her current partner were close; the detective kept an eye on the officer. A boy and his brother got up, and the near-hysterical child ran past Swan. She straightened and followed the boys. From her prereferral vision, she saw the detectives doing the same.

Outside she searched for the boys, spotting them on a nearby bench. The smaller one was clinging to his brother. She took out her badge and showed it to the boy.

“Hi, I’m Emma.” The older one looked about fourteen, he answered. 

“My brother is very upset, Miss. He and the Reverend were close.” There was no denying the anger in the boy’s eyes.

“That one got stuck in your throat, didn’t it kid?” She looked towards the younger one. “What is his name?”

“Timothy.” Swan kneeled on one knee before the boys. 

“Tim, I know what he was. I know how angry it makes you. Hearing people say nice things about him. But you know what he was as well, don’t you?” The boy pulled away from his brother and stared at the woman. He slowly nodded. Swan looked up and asked the older brother if their parents knew? He spat angry words at her as he told her they went to his mother. 

“The fucking bitch is so crept up in Mrs Green’s arse that she told us we are mistaken.” Emma hid her anger. She looked back to see Detective Mills standing there with a quirked brow. Swan waved her over. She indicated with her head to the new partner and shook her head. Luckily Regina understood, and she dismissed the man. The detective approached with caution. 

“Tim, this is my friend Regina. She is one badass cop, and she will help you so that no more people tell lies about him.” For the life of her, she could not say the man’s name. 

“But you need to tell her what he did?” The innocent, tearstained face looked at her.

“Promise?” He asked in a voice that was so small.

“Promise!” Swan responded.

“He kept me after youth group. Then he would touch my G.I Joe,” Swan struggled to keep her smile in. Regina looked at the boy, confused.

“Here?” Swan asked, pointing to his crotch.” He nodded. “Can we call that your private parts?” The boy nodded.

“He touched me there, and then he made me touch his private parts.” That was enough for Swan. She folded the boy in her arms, desperately trying to compose herself. When she let go, Regina saw the tears in her eyes. Swan stood to speak to the teenager.

“Do you know of any other boys?”

“Geoffrey Cobb.” Swan thanked him. She stepped away from them to talk to Regina.

“The boys told their mother, she did nothing. When you find her, please charge her with neglect or abuse or something worse?” Regina heard the anger in every word. “You need to call social services. I can promise you, Tim and Geoff are not the only boys he molested.” Then she turned to walk away.

“Officer Swan wait!” Regina called her back. She looked confused. “What in the world, you drop a bomb on Doctor Lucas, then this? What is this?” Swan shrugged. 

“Your motive.”

***

A week later, Regina Mills was still working the case. She had uncovered years of abuse. Reverend Green liked young children. Once they turned twelve, he lost interest, and the abuse stopped. So far, she had found four minors and eight men. The moment the abuse became public, several young men approached her. All the stories were the same. She looked into the man’s previous congregation and received instant help. 

A twenty-six-year-old trauma councillor. His name was Devan Adams. A former victim of the Reverand, now a man that assisted abused children with their trauma through a reach-out programme. He gave her more names and flew from Chicago to Boston to assist. He was immensely pleased when the Detective told him the man was dead, he outright laughed when he heard the manner in which he was killed. Modern-day monsters finding their place amongst myth.

What bothered the detective is that no one in the close-knit community of the congregation could belief the allegations against the minister. His wife became deaf, dumb and stupid the moment the rumours started. Detective Mills could not get close to the woman who was only communicating through her lawyer. Secrecy regarding molestation was not unheard off, it was actually one of the methods the paedophile kept control over the minor, _it was their secret_. Children were often too traumatised to report the abuse if they comprehended what was happening to them at all.

The murder was placed in the background in light of the witnesses that were coming forward. Child Protective Services were dealing with the bulk of that in coordination with Division for Children, Youth and Families. Public outrage caused a lot of media attention. Regina avoided it at any cost, her mother was vocal enough for the both of them on the matter. Lieutenant Gaton Wood was lapping up the attention. The arrogant, ambitious man operated as the spokesperson, in conjunction with the Bureau of Community Engagement, representing the Commissioner. Wood was not the Commanding Lieutenant for DCYF. Lieutenant Meghan Hurst left the man to smile for the cameras while she and her team investigated the abuse charges. She worked with Social Services and a Paediatric Clinical Psychologist assigned to the BPD in extreme cases.

Meghan and Regina worked closely until their focuses shifted to their respective fields. The Lieutenant did, however, want to speak to Officer Swan as much as the detective did. It was an unresolved matter for Regina. The officer knew of this long-term silent secret before anyone even thought there might be a problem. She identified one of the victims from the start, giving Homicide a motive. Regina interviewed all the parents personally. With the exception of Timothy’s mother, none of the parents was aware of the abuse, eliminating them as suspects as soon as their alibis were confirmed. It left Regina at the starting point, _who would benefit from this murder_?

Detective Mills knocked on the Captain’s office door and entered when he called her.

“I need to speak to Emma?” He looked at her with utter confusion. “Officer Emma Swan,” Regina explained. Spencer sat back in his oversized chair.

“Sorry, no one ever calls her by her first name.” He shrugged. “She is working a double suicide at a school.” 

The Detective held back her annoyance. She sat without prompt and told the Captain that the Officer knew more about the Reverend than what she led to believe. It was an unspoken rule, once the Reverend’s darker side was revealed, no one referred to him as the victim any longer. Spencer listened. Regina dismissed another partner during the investigation, claiming he was too crude to work with traumatised children. She was doing well on her own, but in the field, she would need someone at her side. He indicated his understanding, told her that he could not pull Swan from the case, but that he would see to it that the Officer was available. He dismissed her without discussing a new partner with her. The horrible idea of teaming her up with Swan formulated in his mind. If they worked the Reverend-case together, it might give him an insight if a partnership would work, that was if they did not kill each other first.

***

Captain Spencer read Officer Swan’s file. Not for the first time. Career-wise, she gave him as many headaches as Regina did. The Captain requested additional information on her military career, months before. He received the few pages that told him absolutely nothing. He studied Neal Cassidy and James Durant's files as well. That much he knew, Emma served with these beat cops in Afghanistan. Neal was already flagged as a potential leader. Not only from his outstanding Military record where he held the rank of Sargent. His rookie year indicated a reliable cop who was willing to learn. Senior officers liked him. He worked well with detectives and in a team. Cassidy followed the chain of command, but also demonstrated initiative during investigations.

The Captain contemplated that Swan and Cassidy might make a great team in the future. Currently, it was of no benefit to either. Durant was another matter entirely, he passed all his physical tests with flying colours. His psychological test was different. He qualified, but he had already displayed signs of unravelling. During his first year, a car backfired. Officer Durant pulled out his gun and started to shoot at the vehicle. Spencer placed him on administrated duty after the incident, pending a psychological evaluation. Durant was forced to see the psychologist for six weeks after the event. The Psychologist's assessment was clear. He would lose it again. Post-traumatic stress disorder. The job was stressful. There had not been an incident after that, but no one could predict when another situation would trigger him. 

The Captain insisted that everyone, under his command, had to see the psychologist at least twice a year. Cassidy's psychological evaluation was much better. Swan was a mystery. Her psychological review said she was as healthy as could be. Her behaviour told a different story, it was not only Regina that picked up on the officer’s demeanour. 

Emma Swan had already made a name for herself in the force. As one would expect from a Marine, she followed orders. The Officer, however, was detached, arrogant and more intelligent than her superiors. It caused friction during investigations. The Officer's opinions were often dismissed, only to turn out to be accurate later on. She did not tell the veteran officers _, I told you so_ , but her attituded reflected that fact. Swan had a mouth and insolence to boot. Under the correct guidance, she would make an outstanding officer. He was, nevertheless, at a loss as to what would be the best for his VICE cop. She worked well alone, but Spencer knew that was never a good thing.

***

Swan got tossed around in departments her first few months. She was too hot to work with younger officers, the mysterious temptation she presented seemed too much for most men. Spencer did team her up a few times with Cassidy and his T.O. The feedback was much different than what the other T.O's reported. Swan was smart. She saw things no one would even look at. She was quiet and detached for the most part, except with Neal. Everyone with eyes could see that she loved him. The kind of love a few understood. 

Neal's T.O asked him one day how he was able to be friends with such a stunning, smart woman and not try getting into her pants. Cassidy laughed. 

"It is really simple. I saw what she did to James's face when he tried to go further." His laughter died down. His older partner ventured again. Neal did not look at him when he answered. 

"I would rather have her in my life than not at all." His voice was so thick with emotion that the training officer backed off from the subject.

Six months into her duty, Spencer requested a psychological update on her. The Desk Sergeant and Captain made it sound routine. A check-in to see how she was doing. Swan knew Neal never had _routine psych evals_. It worried her until the doctor started to ask her questions. Swan sat expressionless, answering the man's interrogations. Each one was analysed and dissected before she would give him an answer. _What did he ask? What did he indeed ask? What was he trying to learn?_ When Spencer asked the doctor, the man gave an exasperated sigh. 

"I would hate to play poker with her." It was not an answer. Spencer pushed. The doctor then explained to the Captain the depth of what he understood about Swan. She was guarded. 

"You would not get close to her unless she allowed it." She did not lie, but he suspected that her answers only held the bare minimum of information. The additional knowledge did not help Spencer. 

"She is smart, George. As in wise, experienced. On top of that, she has an exceptional IQ. She lets you see what you need to see." Spencer asked the man his honest opinion. 

"She is going to be exceptional. Either the best detective you have ever worked with, or the most notorious serial killer you ever hunted." The remark concerned the Captain. The doctor merely shrugged his shoulders. 

"There is a thin line between genius and insanity. Personally, I would put her into the dog unit. She should not be working with people."

***

Spencer called Swan in, one afternoon before her shift ended. The moment she stood proudly in front of his desk, fearless, he smiled internally. She certainly had an attitude. The officer reminded him of a young Regina.

"Why did you become a cop?" She thought genuinely about his question. She knew what she told Neal when they were deployed. She did not know anything other than to kill people. It was the truth, to a great extent, but she chose her Degree long before she spoke to Neal. _The criminal mind_. It was an aspect of life she did not understand. _What made a person different? When do you cross over? Was it predictable?_ She understood Maslow's basic needs. Sex, hunger, housing. _But when and how did the need for basic necessities become the driving force to get it at any cost?_

Swan knew the study of the criminal mind was not philosophy. None the less, the question plagued her from a young age. As she became older, rationalisations of divine intervention, predefined life choices, life lessons, karma, all lost their contention in her reasoning. She had dismissed any form or force relating to any kind of religious beliefs. It was at a critical turning point in her life. When a young Swan had lost all hope. All faith in the kindness of men. If god was love, the divine creator would never have created mankind. The driving force behind any motivation and action of the human race was not love, neither hope. It was fear. 

Once she understood that concept, she had a calm settled in her that she only knew as a toddler. It became the foundation of her reasoning. Find out what a person feared, and you could control them. She thought about one of the first quotations she ever learned off by heart:

 _Fear, you must understand is more than a mere obstacle. Fear is a Teacher, the first one you ever had_. _Professor Jonathan Crane_.

The true philosophy behind the words became realism for her much later, but at the time, even so young. She understood that fear had much power. For Swan, it was a natural relationship. Once you stop fearing something, it no longer had any power over you. The things she did fear… it kept her sane, and in certain aspects, it kept her safe. Self-destruction was far too inviting for her. It was fear that kept her under control.

Soon after her mind unravelled this mystery, Swan packed away her few comic books. She started to read true crime. Then books on serial killers. She read or watched as much as she could about any and every serial killer. Swan was confident that she had killed people in Afghanistan. It was only after a head-on kill, one she was certain off, that she questioned herself. 

She knew she had the drive and capacity in her to become a killer. God knows, she had enough hate as well. _Then why was she not a serial killer, an assassin? What made her different?_ It became the question she wanted to be answered more than any other. There was an excessive volume of questions she wanted to be answered.

She ticked all the check-boxes of all the renowned killers, _bedwetting, arson, cruelty to animals, injury to the head_ … She had killed. She had criminal tendencies. There was a man out there that she wanted to kill. Desperately kill. Hopefully, with her bare hands. She also knew, there would come a time that she might kill again. _So why didn’t she?_ _Deep within her, she knew the truth. It might well have been her path if someone did not intervene at a critical time in her youth._

***

"I want to protect people." 

She finally answered the Captain. It was the truth, she certainly did want to protect people. Swan, however, knew that the subconscious decision she took years before had an origin. She wanted to know why people killed, why they destroyed lives and families… and that was what she wanted to stop. The pain inflicted on others through senseless murder. It was an aspect of being a Marine that she often questioned. She protected her brothers, but she was also killing a son, a father, a man. It was not the killing of the body she was concerned with, it was the meaning that person had to others. She was killing a loved one. 

More so, she killed the potential that life might have had. It was a burden on her Soul. She was a victim once, she still felt the pain of a stranger with no motive, ending a life that had potential… A life that had meaning to Swan. A person she loved.

Spencer indicated his understanding. He knew there was more, but he did not push.

"Okay, go home, Kid. Report to the Desk Sergeant in the morning.”

At the time Spencer reviewed what he already knew. Emma Swan was sharp, attentive to other's needs. The Captain had no illusion that one day the girl would make an outstanding detective, right now, he did not have a solution. He sighed deeply; this job was supposed to be less stressful than being a Lieutenant. Between Mills and Swan, he had more stress than he needed. After Regina crushed another partner's balls, he felt like signing them up together. It was a whim. The longer he thought about it, the more it made sense. They might kill each other, but it would work.

Spencer thought it better to discuss Swan's career path with the new Sergeant Detective and the Lieutenant Detective Wood, who ran most of the Divisions. The Captain eventually assigned Swan to VICE and not Homicide with Regina. The Lieutenant served as one of the overall administrators for GIU, VICE, SWAT, personnel and schedules, with the assistance of the Sergeants. The Captain directly supervised Major Crimes and Homicide. Everyone in the department knew that Spencer was the real thing. A cop, at his essence.

Lieutenant Wood, however, was a politician. He liked the cameras and Spencer allowed him to proceed that avenue. As long as the man did his job, the Captain did not care if he became the next Deputy Mayor. He was a necessity for administration functions that Spencer hated to do as a District Lieutenant.

Lieutenant, Gaston Wood, had a chip on his shoulder. He did not care for anyone's opinion, and he was disapproving of the Captain's _pet project_ with the young officer. He was the most senior Lieutenant. Therefore, Spencer filled him in on the changes in Swan’s career. It was a courtesy to his second in command, a function Wood was normally responsible for. 

Swan was working interviews and complaints at the down stair’s bullpen. A member of the public yelled at her. Wood called another officer over to fill in for Swan as he told the Rookie to follow him. He instructed her on her new function. Then he informed her in no uncertain terms, that he did not know what political strings she pulled or who was backing her, but he would personally see to her career being placed on hold if she so much as stepped out of line. Swan had no idea what he was speaking of. When he indicated that she would be working undercover, she felt apprehension. As the Desk Sergeant assigned her to VICE and not GIU, Swan expressed her exhilaration.

James fumed when he heard the news. Not only was Neal and Swan advancing far quicker than he was, but Swan's work also became more dangerous. He hated seeing her in the field instead of being behind a desk. In the few months at HQ, she had already made enemies. The Lieutenant's attitude did not faze her. She was reporting directly to Lieutenant August Booth in VICE. The guy had a sense of humour. He regarded Swan as nothing more than a Rookie. Thus, most of her assignments were playing a homeless person or a drunk. Sitting somewhere, observing and reporting. She was never asked to engage in any activity.

****

Swan worked undercover on and off. She was good at it. She blended in. Observed everything. The people, the situation. Her mind solved what was said, not said. The subtle innuendos people made. She loved it. 

Finally, she was assigned a case that got her out of filthy clothes and sitting around. Her superiors were divided on assigning her the case. It was a delicate undercover job. Wood gave in after Booth convince him that Swan might be able to do it. The Zuhair Hakim case.

Swan had no direction, she was supposed to become friendly with the bodyguard, when he became handsy, she broke it, then she made her way to Zuhair’s office. Disabling two more guards. By the time she stood face to face with Zuhair, four men were bleeding on the floor, excluding the bodyguard. They were armed with guns, she had a knife. Her actions impressed Zuhair. She was in and in a better position than her superiors had hope for.

***

Months later, she was assigned her current case. Swan was young enough to pass as a school student. _Rip Taylor_ was twenty-seven, now _Lillian West_ was a senior. She partnered with another cop, who took the position as student councillor. Neal helped her choose an outfit the day before she started school. Between his insulting remarks and playfulness, they created a look for her that said _troubled badass teenager_.

The case progressed slower than what Swan anticipated. She was undercover for three-weeks when Captain Spencer received an unsuspected phone call from an old friend who was a teacher at the same school. Swan was sent in to find out more about two suicides, days apart. A-grade kids. School or aspects thereof was a nightmare for Swan. She had learned, however, to overcome her fears. She was a master at that.

Swan attended the high school under the name _Lilian West_. Therefore, when George Spencer received a call from his friend, asking him to please meet with her as a matter of urgency, regarding a new student, _Lillian West_ , the Captain was furious.

During the drive to the school, he conjured up several scenarios as to what shit heap Swan got herself into. Liza met George at the entrance to the school. They hugged, caught up, then Liza placed her arm around his waist as she walked inside. 

She explained at length what was happening at the school. The two suicides. Rumours that were doing the rounds about the bright young girls. Then the story trailed off to her new student.

"She is bright. There is enormous potential there. She asks well-formulated questions. Her input in conversations is outstanding. She joined one of my study groups." Liza carried on. Singing the praise of her new student. Spencer almost wondered if she was referring to Swan when she spoke of the kid's social interaction. The girl that hardly spoke to any officers, other than Cassidy and Durant. Liza taught History and English Literature. Her study groups were for bright students. The few that wanted to learn. Discussions often deviated from the topic at hand. Changing into intellectual conversations of current affairs, economics and politics.

Spencer knew that his officer worked hard to get into the study group. The suicide girls were in the group as well. Liza was a person of interest until Swan cleared her. The woman did not have any ill intent towards her students, the opposite was the fact.

"Liza, why am I here?" When Swan had the opportunity to study whatever she could, she picked as many subjects as her roster allowed. History, English Lit and Maths were compulsory to the assignment. She picked Science, Art and Social Studies. She also enrolled in the music department. An afterschool activity. She argued that all the smart kids played an instrument. When she walked into the class, a Latino girl was playing the cello. Swan instantly fell in love. She talked about the moment too long to be anything other than infatuation. Spencer was not too sure if it was with the music, the girl or the instrument.

Liza took Spencer to the art department. Introducing him to the eccentric Art Teacher Miss Walters, who echoed Liza's comments on Swan's potential. He questioned his presence at the school. The woman exchanged a look.

"Captain, I have been a teacher for twenty-five years. I have seen it all. Over time you recognise patterns." She opened a file cabinet to take out Swan's art. Spencer looked at it critically. 

The four A3 sketches were done in soft pencil, he appreciated that his officer had an unmistaken talent. The work was profound, detailed, haunting, drawing the onlooker in. There was not a part of the paper that was not utilised. 

The first one was a self-portrait; he assumed the girl to be Swan. She drew herself as a shattered mirror. The slight half-moon scar under her left eye was a prominent gash in the sketch. He picked up the next one. It was a nude. A woman lying in a foetal position. Her back ripped open as if a werewolf clawed the frail body leaving a massively exposed incision there. 

Regarding the first two, the others were tame. A toddler on a swing, her head bowed. Rain pouring down on her. The last one was an apparent suicide. An open-handed forearm. The wrist cut vertically. Ragged, scarred as if the victim tried to cut herself over and over. But the ugly scar was covered with the most beautiful, lady-like tattoo he had ever seen. Spencer swallowed.

The women then preceded to give him a profile. Spencer listened. None of the things they noted was in his officer's file. He made a mental note to investigate Swan's past. He knew nothing of her, other than her military record and academy results.

Spencer considered the implications of the teachers' worries. They sketched a picture of abuse and a self-complex. Of an unloved, lonely, brilliant, but troubled teen. Spencer informed them that he would explore the case. On his way out of the school, he called Swan, instructing her that he needed a briefing on the situation. She told him that she would drop by the station before she went home. It gave him a few hours to look at her file more intensely.

***

The Captain knew Swan was seriously injured during her deployment. She was medically evacuated from an undisclosed location in Afghanistan, treated, then airlifted to a UN Military facility in Germany. She returned to duty a few months later. The young Marine was offered an honourable discharge. The Private First Class had served nearly a year by then. She could have asked for a transfer, but she returned to her unit. In a war zone, staying on for another three years.

The PFC's career excelled from thereon. There were no details about the incident that caused Swan's injury, other than a gunshot wound to her left shoulder. She received a Purple Heart. She also received a Bronze Star a year later. There was no explanation other than _Distinction for heroism_. Spencer went as far as calling her Commanding Officer. The Company Commander was not available, but the Executive Officer was, Lieutenant Richard Harrold.

"Strange cat that one." Spencer wanted to roll his eyes. The X.O continued. 

"I have seen a lot of Marines that did not want to be in Afghanistan. Swan did not even want to be a Marine. She had three opportunities to leave with an honourable discharge, I never knew why she did not. She pushed through. Stubborn, determined, fearless. We thought she would phase out with the rest of her squad, but she stayed on for another year." 

Spencer asked a few more questions. He learned then that Neal Cassidy was the Squad Sargent, Will Connor O’Sean was the Platoon Lieutenant. James Durant has bumped down a rank for _conduct unbecoming_. The incident occurred shortly after Swan returned to duty from her shoulder injury. Lieutenant Harrold warned Spencer of James's volatile nature. He was obsessed with the woman and was never quite the same after she was shot. Lieutenant O’Sean insisted, at that time, that he be removed from the field. The brass told him to handle it.

"Do you know where I can find Lieutenant O’Sean?" Harrold cleared his throat. 

"No, Sir. There are a lot of rumours about him. That he became a mercenary, joined the CIA, that he is working for the mob. Truthfully, I do not know."

Spencer calmly asked the question that was on his mind. 

"Was there ever a sexual miss-conduct incident?" Harrold gave a short laugh. Then explained that if there were, O’Sean or Cassidy would have killed the offender, and no one would ever know. The Marine Lieutenant carried on. Explaining to the Captain that Swan was in the field as per the regulations. She served as the driver. She should have seen limited action, but the female officer got into the midst of things more than once. Her record was outstanding.

"Her retracted record will tell you little of who she is." The Marine ended off. Spencer was quiet for a moment. 

"Is she a danger to a unit?" He asked. The Lieutenant snickered.

"Absolutely not Sir. A Marine does not receive a Bronze Star if they cannot be trusted in a squad." The man trailed off. He knew what Spencer needed to hear. 

"Sir, she was a juvenile when she joined the Marines. There is information that is excluded from her file due to this." He inhaled deeply. "Everything you will ever hear about Swan is that she is outstanding. She had the respect of the men in her squad. She has loyal friends. Her record is exceptional for a female officer."

"But?" Spencer asked.

"When I met Swan for the first time, face to face. I swear I have never seen so much pain in a person so young. Whatever happened to her before she joined the Marines…" His voice grew soft. "It broke something in her. It changed her. I think that girl is much stronger than even her friends realise."

Spencer thanked the Lieutenant for his time. Then contemplated what he knew about Swan's past or lack thereof. Spencer placed the various reports in chronological order. On paper, Emma Swan existed from sixteen years of age. Her birth certificate was made out almost six months after her sixteenth birthday. Issued by the State of Ohio, City of Cleveland. Her mother was listed as Sinead Swan from Toronto, Canada. It explained the unusual surname. No information on the father.

If one asked Swan, she would comment that she was from Chicago. She was a Cubs fan. She had a Mid-West-lakes accent. Spencer knew, her Boston accent was good. _Learned behaviour?_ He looked through school records for Illinois and Ohio. He could not find any school listing for his young officer. Swan received her GED certificate while she was in Afghanistan. That much he knew. As he searched, his clenched heart pounded. He could not find any record for Emma Swan before turning sixteen.

****

Swan knew something was the matter the moment she looked into the Captain's eyes. Her defence mechanisms kicked in. Spencer could feel a wall being raised between them. 

"I was called to the school today." There was no reason for him to hide. 

"Your History teacher has some concerns." She frowned at the statement. Sergeant Detective Phillip Prince, the replacement for Daniel Colter, was listed as her _parent_ for the undercover operation. If there was a problem with her grades or anything else relating to the school, they would have called him or Sergeant Detective Booth, not the Captain.

"Sir?" The question was cautious. Spencer sat back against his chair. He tuned in all his skills as an investigator when he asked his first question. 

"Have you ever tried to commit suicide?" George Spencer watched Swan closely. She did not blink, stiffen up or react in any manner that he would have expected. She calmly told him that she tried to kill herself after she turned sixteen. Spencer was taken aback. Her Military and Police medical reports noted various scar-tissue. Nothing more. She instantly knew he had seen her sketch. Swan pulled up the right sleeve of her over-sized hoodie. 

The scar on his officer's arm looked nothing like the drawing. It was one cut. No hesitation. When Swan cut herself, she meant to kill herself. The scar itself was not as crude as the drawing. The tattoo covered up the attempted suicide, it was the same as the picture. Done in light and dark green. An Irish Trinity Knot. From the knot, delicate vines flowed to form infinity signs. The rest of the vines flowed, forming a symmetric six-inch embroidery around the scar, making it hardly visible. Fine, small four-leave clovers rounded off the delicate curls. Swan pulled her sleeve down. 

"Want to tell me what this is about?" The sentence came out in her bright Chicago accent. She dropped the _H's_ , pitched the _A's_. Spencer snickered. She sounded badass. Calm, collective, soft-spoken. He recalled what the psychologist said. She was not going to give him anything.

"Mrs Harris thinks that you are being abused." Swan frowned. "Sexually." Spencer looked for a response. Swan lifted an eyebrow with it a smile formed.

"I have a degree in Criminal Psychologies Sir, I know how to blend in. This…" She pulled the oversized sweater. "This is what makes her think that I am a victim of sexual abuse. Hiding my body by wearing clothes that are too big. It is a typical characteristic of abuse." She could see the relief on the Captain's face.

"Is this case…" He struggled for the words. "Too close to home?" Swan thought about it for a moment. The Captain was relieved she did.

"No, Sir."

"Any progress?" Swan proceeded to give him the highlights of her week. The suicide-teens did not have many friends. There was nothing in their personal lives to suggest what happened, the girls had each other. No signs were suggesting the heart-breaking outcome. Their parents were devastated. The drawing of her suicide made some kids open up to the young undercover officer. They spoke of the pressure of school, demands for better grades. That they all felt at one point, it would be easier to give in.

"Was that the space you were in?" Spencer asked. _Concern?_ Swan looked away from him. She contemplated how to answer the question. 

"I was in a very dark place, Captain. I did not have the same problems these girls had. Neither did I have their support structure." She told the Captain that there was another possible angle to their suicide, she needed some confirmation though. Spencer told her to get it done. 

She left his office, her fists balled at her side. Her jaw set. She tried to collect her thoughts. The Captain opened a hurtful memory. _Fucking teacher!_ She thought. _Leave it to an older, wiser woman to see what others could not!_ Anxiety boiled in her. Her worlds were colliding, and she needed to keep them separate. Swan subconsciously started to breathe in measured breaths, calming herself. Some days she was okay, other days her grip on reality and sanity was frail. What pissed her off about her mind, was at times, her equilibrium could change in a fraction of a second. Fight or flight mode would kick in, and in moments like this, Swan knew, she became unpredictable. She tried her memory trick, reciting lists of useless information. At that moment, she could not think of a subject. She understood enough about her dysfunctional mind to realise she needed to rid herself from her thoughts. _Anger_ , it was an enemy. She lost her tight grip when she became too angry. _Regret_ … _Fuck!_ Deep seeded sorrow fuelled by the fire of her anger due to all the people who had failed her. On some level, she knew it was the reason why she became a cop. To protect others that could not defend themselves. She exhaled. _Get your shit together, Swan!_ She inhaled.


	4. Freedom to lash out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the support, kudos and comments. This chapter touches on self-harm. Truthfully I suppose there should be a ton of warnings for this story. The main theme deals with "control". This chapter is one of many dealing with Emma's past and how she resolves issues. None of which is healthy.

Regina Mills saw the officer walk past her desk, assuming Spencer had a talk with her on the Reverend-case. The kid was upset. Regina looked towards the Captain's office, he was bent over paperwork. She instantly knew what troubled the young officer was not work-related. She has not seen the woman around the last few weeks. It occasionally happened when officers rotated shifts. Regina returned to her paperwork, pushing the woman from her mind.

The Detective worked for perhaps twenty minutes when she could hear a commotion and yelling. It was coming from the gym. The floor below her. She instinctively knew it was the young officer. She took determined strides as she made her way down to the gym.

Several officers and detectives were crowding the boxing ring in the middle of the gym. She was about to leave when a nervous tension jumped up to her spine. Regina turned back, pushing her way through the crowd of men. She gasped when she saw what was going on…

****

Swan felt trapped and angry. None of her breathing exercises worked. She needed to get rid of her adrenaline. She took off her hoodie and jeans. Hanged it in her locker. She was alone in the locker room, which was a great relief. Swan yanked a long sleeve Henley on over her head and pulled on long exercise pants. She walked to the gym with no idea of what she would be doing there. She saw Sergeant Detective Phillip Prince jabbing at an officer. He was exactly what she needed.

"Detective?" He stopped the lesson, spitting the gum guard out of his mouth. "Swan." He greeted. Swan decided to play on his ego. It was the only way she was going to get what she wanted.

"A hundred dollar says I can beat you." He roared with laughter, so did every other man in the gym. Swan knew what he was. It would be a fair fight.

"Rookie, I will take your money!" He said as he held the ropes open for her. 

"No rules." She added as one of the other female officers ran to get her some gear.

"Only if you wear full guard." She nodded, then added, "Same rule applies for you, Detective. You can take a waist guard. Would not want to crush your nuts." She was baiting him. "I will take a chest protection vest?" He smiled widely.

"I am going to kick your arrogant ass little girl."

The officer who assisted her with the gear wrapped the rookie's knuckles expertly, placed the body vest on her and tightened it. Swan pulled her gloves on. The female officer handed her a mouthguard. "Good luck, Chica, estásloca." Swan smiled at the comment. 

She and the Detective met in the middle. They bumped their fists together. Then she moved away. He was head and shoulders taller than her, more than twice her body weight, and earned his black belt in Martial Arts years before. She kicked Neal's ass the first time they were instructed in hand to hand combat. She had no training in any of the arts or military combat skills, yet she beat him. Prince was about to learn the same lesson her friend did years before.

Prince wanted to teach the kid a lesson without killing her. He went on the attack. He swung a massive fist at the left side of her head. She ducked and slammed her left fist into his ribs. _She can hit_ , he thought as she turned under his next attack and kicked him in the very same spot. He got a hit or two into her body. Even though she was tall for a woman, she moved fast. She was fit, as well. He used his skill to place a perfect sidekick into her face. She blocked the strike with her right glove, dropped low and smashed up into the side of his knee. He felt it. It made his movements slower. He started attacking her sideways, seeing as she used her left fist predominantly. An assumption that she was left-handed. He paid for that as well.

He assessed her skill to be good enough not to hold back. It was what she was waiting for. The change in his body. The quicker moves, more accurate attacks. He was hitting harder. Swan could feel her muscles strain. The smell of sweat filled her lungs. She wanted something more. The room faded away as she rid her body of the pent-up emotions, she had no other method of dealing with it right now.

She understood herself. What she was doing was fucked-up, but she knew it worked. The sadness filled her being once more. It caused her to attack the detective in rapid succession. She recognised his skill and waited for his full-on assault. _Pain_ , she understood pain all too well. Her lack of knowledge in dealing with emotional pain was compensated for her familiarity with physical pain. Pain and freedom. A quiet mind. It was what she needed after the emotional upset. The kind of freedom that came with pain. Freedom to lash out. To feel your body fatigue itself and your mind standing still for a moment, if only for a moment…

****

"What in the hell do you think you are doing?" Swan heard Detective Mills’ voice and looked to the side. Prince, already committed to the cross attack, his gloved fist connected full-on with Swan's face. Swan dropped to the floor, blood spewing during her fall.

"Shit! Swan, Swan, are you alright?"

Prince had his gloves off the moment Swan stirred. His partner was in the ring, the two men attending to the rookie. The Latina officer that helped her gear up was at her side. Somewhere in the background, Swan could hear Mills yell about barbaric customs, the onlookers clearing out as she reprimanded them.

"Swan?" Prince's partner Herman held onto her shoulder. "Swan?" She held up a hand. 

"I hear you." He slapped her back lightly. 

"Crazy girl. I will get you some ice."

Regina did see the blood on the floor but paid it no attention. "What the hell were you thinking? Taking on the biggest jock with a black belt? Do you have a death wish Officer Swan?"

Swan held her face. She was in a world of pain. "Swan, I'm sorry, that last hit…"

"It's cool Detective." She still held her face, blood dripping on the floor. "How are your ribs?" She asked, not looking up. Prince gave a short laugh. 

"It is going to hurt in the morning." His hand was protectively on Swan's back.

"Chica, tu jefe se ve enojado." The Latina Officer commented. Then giggled.

"I'm sure," Swan remarked dryly where she sat looking at Regina after the officer's comment.

"Why are you not getting up? You wanted to play with the big boys. Acting like a child with a temper!" Regina had no idea why she was so angry at the Officer.

"You are not helping Regina!" Prince yelled at her as Herman came back with a bag of ice and a first aid box. 

"Can you look at me, Badass?" Sean Herman asked. Swan knew it was going to hurt, but she lifted her head.

"Oh, fuck!" She closed her eyes against the pain. Herman exclaimed.

"Shit, girl!" Regina went pale as she looked at Swan's face on Herman’s remark.

"It's broken, isn’t it?" The rookie asked. She was now sweating profusely.

"Yeah, Kid. Do you trust me?" She snorted. Neil told her that she could trust Herman. He was a Marine before he became a cop.

"Ooh-Rah Sir!" He shook his head.

"Hold still?" Regina heard a crack as Herman reset Swan's nose. She turned even paler.

"Fuck me!" Swan cried out as her hands went to her face once more. "What a clusterfuck!" Both men laughed.

"Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" Prince asked, amused.

"She can kiss your hairy ass and consider herself lucky for all I care," Swan answered him as Herman placed the bag of ice on her face.

"You need to clean up Chica." Swan looked at the officer, estimating her a few years older than herself.

"Cual es tu nombre oficial?" The woman smiled. The rookie's Spanish was appalling. In her current state, the words were coming out nasal on top of that. 

"Esméralda Sanchez."

"Nice to meet you, Esméralda."

"She needs to go to the hospital." Regina's voice was soft, too soft. Swan took the bag of ice from her face to look at the woman. Regina swallowed when she saw the bruising. Swan braced herself with her left arm, Prince stepped in and helped her up.

"Here, Kid." She looked at the money he held out to her. Swan gave him a big smile. The man had honour. He knew she kicked his ass. She pushed the money back. 

"Keep it for next time?"

"You fought for money?" Regina asked. Once more outraged. Swan ignored her as she made her way out of the ring with Esmeralda's help.

"Yeah, Regina. She was winning as well until you came in here yelling. You broke her concentration." Prince pointed out to her.

"Do not place the blame on me!" She shook her head at the men who she thought should have known better.

"I sure as hell will never take her on again when she is pissed off. Trust me; the kid handled herself until she looked towards you." 

She could see the disregard he had for her. 

"What the hell are you doing here anyway?" She was dressed, as usual, tight skirt, high heels, perfect make-up. It was the most inappropriate clothes for a gym. Herman treated her softer, knowing she was one of the most senior female officers and likely looking out for the kid as they all seemed to do. 

"Keep the ice on her face as long as you can manage. This is to plaster her nose. Given her stubborn nature, I doubt she will go to a hospital." He placed the brought plasters in his colleague's hand. Regina bit her lip. She walked away from the gym to the locker room, bumping into Sanchez. 

"I thought you are helping her to clean up?" Sanchez looked at the Detective oddly.

"Swan never showers here. I let her be. I think she is scared she might offend the other women." Sanchez explained.

"Offend the other woman?" Regina questioned. Sanchez moved uncomfortably. 

"I don't mind. Swan does not make me nervous. I will take it as a compliment if she checks me out. But she doesn’t. She never interacts with anyone besides Neal." Regina balled her fist, then rubbed her thumb through her hand.

"Has anyone commented to her about being a lesbian?" Sanchez shook her head. 

"Not that I know of Detective." She looked to the ground. "But she has eyes that do not belong to a woman so young. Something might have happened in her past."

Regina thanked the officer and made her way to the locker room. She could hear the shower running. 

"Officer Swan, are you alright?" The water was off in an instance. Swan's head appeared from the stall closest to her locker.

"I'm fine, thank you, Detective." There was a strain in her voice that Regina picked up this time. She walked further into the room.

"Officer, can I help you?" Swan was standing with her back against the tiled wall. Her towel held up in front of her, naked, dripping body. Regina felt relief. From where she stood, it seemed only to be the rookie's nose. 

"I did not picture you as shy about your body," Regina commented on breaking the tenseness she could feel, assuming the young officer’s arrogance extended to her body and not only her mind. Her words, however, seemed to agitate the young woman more.

"Not all women are as flawless as you Detective. Since I was four, I have showered and dressed by myself. I do not need your help." Regina backed up a bit. She saw the stiffness in Swan's body.

"Are you injured in any other place? I can look?" Swan's eyes lit up with a fire. Regina could see the woman's body shake with the effort of keeping her temper under control. The Detective did not know if it was because of her vulnerable position or the fact that she was merely too tired to get into an argument, but the younger woman was struggling not to lash out. The Detective placed her hands up. Her voice continued to be soft. "I am only trying to assist."

"And I said that I was fine!" Swan managed through clenched teeth. Regina gave up. Her hands fell to her side and balled into fists. Somehow, she knew if she pushed further, the rookie was going to lose her temper. "I will wait outside for you then."

Swan felt the release of stress in her body the moment the detective turned and walked off. She stepped out of the shower to her locker and dressed as fast as she could. She made sure her clothes covered everything before she exited the locker room. Regina was seated in the hallway. Her legs crossed, waiting patiently. 

"Can I look at you now?" Swan nodded. Regina lowered Swan's face to get a better look at her nose. The swelling has become significant in the few moments since the rookie took off to wash away the sweat and blood of the fight.

"Sit!" The detective instructed as she pointed to the chair; she occupied a moment before. Swan took up the seat and allowed Regina to touch her face as she placed the brought plaster over her nose. Then the Detective looked at the swelling on one cheek. It was puffy, and she could not determine if it was due to the broken nose or an injury by itself. The detective told the kid to stand. She delicately touched Swan's sides. Sliding her soft slender fingers over the younger woman's ribs. She felt a variance in a spot of intercostal muscles and concentrated there. Swan closed her hand over the probing fingers. 

"Satisfied?" She asked indifferently. Regina stood back. A frown on her face. The ribs where she felt a kind of hardness were not broken, but there was something there. Through the material of Swan's hoodie and t-shirt, she could not determine what it was.

"No, but I assume your continued co-operation is too much to expect?" She looked down then up into Regina's eyes.

"Yes, Detective. But thank you." Regina took the ceasefire.

"Here," She handed Swan the bag of ice that she placed on a nearby table. "Keep it on your face until I can get you to a hospital."

The expressive hazel-green eyes bore into the Detective. 

"I am not going to a fucking hospital." She said as she made her way back to the office.

Regina followed the rookie. She was furious. When the young woman entered the open bullpen, there were cheers and mocking from all sides. The detective looked on astonished as Swan smiled, a faint blush creeping up her cheeks. She shook her head, high-fived Detective Prince and thanked Herman once more. Regina did not understand the display. She could handle herself in self-defence, but the macho exhibition of earlier, the enthusiastic cheer the rookie received now was beyond her logical understanding. Swan knew she needed to report this. Detective Prince offered to go with her. Before she could accept, Regina intervened, stating that she would handle it. 

The Captain looked up as the women walked in. He frowned at the sight Swan made.

"You need to have that checked out." He commented as he continued to read. His lack of concern for the officer irked the detective.

"Detective Herman already reset it, Sir." George did not look-up. 

"It was not a request Officer." Regina noticed the defeat in Swan's body. She realised that the woman was speaking far more through her expressions than words. She made a mental note of it.

"Sir do I need to fill out an incident report?"

"Was it a fair fight?" George asked, still reading. 

"Yes, Sir." The officer assured him. The Captain stopped for a moment, looked at her then asked. "Is the other guy still alive?" He was rewarded with a shy smile. Spencer continued. "How will you explain the injury at your current assignment?" Swan thought about it.

"It might work well with the lead I have Captain." Spencer thought about everything he knew of Emma Swan. Prince and Booth were happy with her assignment. So were the other cops who worked the suicides. Swan gave them insight to the girls and their situations that they did not have before.

"Get it done." The Captain dismissed her. If it surprised him that the Detective stayed behind, he did not indicate it.

"She is reckless." Regina's voice was stern. Spencer looked up at her. _Was it concern_? He dismissed the notion, knowing Regina’s reputation. 

"Where is your new partner?" The Captain asked, instead of addressing her concerns. The Detective tapped her forefinger with annoyance against her thigh; it made the Captain sigh. He told her to get out and to make sure Swan saw a doctor.


	5. Is it in the water?*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The events of this chapter is something not everyone understands, but it is real and it happens to a lot of us.  
> When I was young, I was thrown out of a few ladies restrooms.  
> On the religious matters: I do not wish to offend anyone of faith. This is my experience and something that happens in my country. It is a reality, however unacceptable.
> 
> *It's in the Water  
> Is a 1997 independent film. Written and directed by Kelli Herd, the film touches on themes of homosexuality, AIDS, coming out and small-town prejudice.

Convincing the girl to see a doctor was met with pungent resistance. Regina Mills has never met a person so persistent in avoidance of medical care. After a ten-minute argument, Regina uttered in frustration that she would drag her to the pathologist if Swan did not comply with her request. At the threat, Swan turned her head.

"Sure!" The kid volunteered. _Should have known_. Mills thought as she made the call.

The more she interacted with the young woman, the more agitated she became. It was not the reason why she was concerned, however. Regina, more than most people understood privacy. Hiding a secret and using anger as a defence mechanism. But god, this kid was like a porcupine. Cute to look at, but as soon as one got to close, without warning, she would turn and attack.

"New partner?" The Medical Examiner asked the detective when she got her first look at her _unusual arrival_. Regina threw her a look that could kill. Red rolled her eyes at the expression on her friend's face. 

"All right then. Let's have a look?" Red took the plaster from Swan's nose to critically observe the damage. "Regina was a little hazy on the details of how this happened?"

"I got punched in the face." Red felt her annoyance increase. 

"Now that clears up everything. Fine, tell me about your current case?" Swan has not been in the ME’s office since the Green case, weeks before.

"Working undercover." Swan knew what she was trying to do, so she threw her a bone. "I am back at school."

"That explains it then." Regina interrupted, sarcasm dripping from her lips. A raised eyebrow from her friend compelled the detective to elaborate. "She is behaving like a juvenile. That is what got her hurt." 

Doctor Lucas understood the distant detective better than most. Regina Mills was deceptive. Not in the way her rat-ass mother was. Regina came across as indifferent and cold. Red knew it was far from the personality her friend genuinely possessed. At work, as Detective Mills, she was hard. Regina, her friend, had a soft side. She liked gardening, tending to her apple tree and was passionate about many things. 

The concern Red heard in her friend's voice was sincere. She could distinguish between Regina's words and their meaning because she knew her so well. The detective's words were critical, but her voice betrayed the care. Most people avoided Regina due to this kind of critical attacks. Red smiled _if only they knew_. Inches deeper was a smart, tentative woman. A woman with a broken heart. A heart that she protected fiercely. Her external façade served her well for two reasons, it kept potential hurt and her mother away. Red looked at the reluctant patient a bit different. _Why does she care about you?_

"I thought you liked bad girls, Detective?" Red smiled naughtily. Regina nearly choked. An easy conversation started between the three women, while Red examined Swan, asking her questions about her injury in between. The older women exchanged looks as they became aware of the Officer's measured breathing to keep herself calm, while the doctor was examining her ribs. 

Regina specifically asked Red to inspect her ribs. She raised a questioning brow at the unusual request. Asking Regina if she coped a feel? Regina's response was one of irritation.

Regina patted the kid's leg to encourage Swan to which Red shook her head. 

"You are doing well, Swan," Red interjected. Both women assumed her breathing was heavy due to the pain. 

"There is too much swelling for me to see if your nose was set correctly. I don’t think your ribs are broken, but I will have a look. An X-ray will show me more."

"I am fine, thank you, Doctor." Swan ended the examination just like that. She hopped off the exam table only to be stopped by a horrified Red.

"I need to X-ray you!" Swan's eyes were green.

"I said I would see a Doctor. I did. Now I am going home."

Regina shook her head in aggravation. "Thank you, Red. I will call you later?" 

****

Regina pushed any thoughts regarding Swan from her mind the next day as she busied herself with a never-ending caseload. She heard the Sargent Detective's partner Herman mock him about getting his ass handed to him by a girl. Prince pulled his shirt up to show his friend. Regina wanted to close her eyes, she desired to ignore them, but she looked.

Prince had a large bruise on his ribcage. He tried to hide the fact that he was walking with a slight limp as a result of Swan hitting his knee. Regina turned her attention back to her work. The morning briefing was due to start. To the Captain's relief, Regina liked the new additions to their unit. Phillip had a different way of dealing with people than Daniel, but from the moment he stepped into the position of team leader, he had only shown Regina courtesy and respect. The day before was the first time they had an altercation.

She wanted to learn more about Swan's undercover assignment. She asked the Sergeant Detective. He explained to her that concerns were raised at a prominent high school because there were two suicides within days of each other. The Columbine and Virginia Tech shootings were still fresh in the minds of parents. As a result, the school asked for assistance. Swan was the only person who would pass as a high school student. He gave Regina the case file to look at. 

"Spencer is struggling to find her a suitable partner." Mills hardly heard what he said. Her eyes were on the record. Before she walked away, she absentmindedly told him the officer seemed to get along with Sanchez. Prince thought it over and reported back to his Captain.

****

Swan caused a stir when she entered her first class. With her head ducked and her hoodie covering a ballcap, everyone could still see the bruises, covered by a plaster. As luck would have it, the morning started with English Literature. Mrs Harris was appalled. Swan had the brought plaster on over her nose that Neal helped her with that morning. Her eyes were puffy from swelling and crying. James went bezerk when he saw her. He continued to scream at her until Will came to remove him from the condo. Then she fell asleep in Neal's arms, on his bed. Her body and mind fatigue. The swelling was made worse from the crying. Deep purple bruising settled under her eyes, making her look younger and haunted.

Mrs Harris calmly instructed her to step outside. The teacher felt anything but calm as her heart raced. She directed the rest of the students in a task, then followed Swan into the hallway.

"What happened Lilian?" Swan did not want to tell the woman, engrossed in her role of the troubled teen, her hands were stuffed into the pockets of her hoodie. She did not make eye contact with the teacher. Instead, she looked around her and scuffed the floor with her boot.

"Lilian?" The teacher took hold off Swan's fidgety hands.

"Please Honey? Tell me what happened?" Swan swallowed. 

_Where were you eleven years ago?_ The young woman wondered in agony. She tried to hide her pain from the soft blue eyes. She learned early in life that the best way to lie was, to tell the truth. Leaving something out, adding something more, but still a variant of the fact. It not only sounded more authentic, but you also did not need to remember what lies you told to whom. It was now a useful asset in her work.

"I was beaten up by some guys." Liza Harris encouraged her student to carry on with a firmer hold on her hands. 

"This girl…" Swan's voice broke. "She chased me out of the toilet in the mall. She thought I was a boy." Despite her long blonde hair, which she mostly hid under a cap or hoodie, Liza could easily see how _Lilian_ was mistaken for a boy. Her clothes were men's sweaters, jeans and worn boots.

"She went kinda psycho, yelling." Swan tried to close her mind. Concentrating on the here and now. She knew the teacher believed the lie about her injury. No one could fake emotion that well. But like all her memories, Swan had to hold on, just in case she shattered. "After I left. These guys beat me up. Calling me a dyke."

When she told Captain Spencer that she had a lead, it was this, a rumour that the two dead girls were in a relationship. She was now testing the waters to see people's reactions by _outing_ herself. She saw her teacher's understanding, the sympathy reflected in her teary gaze. The older woman pulled Swan in for a hug, the pupil went stiff at the contact. Liza Harris held on. She held her student until she felt her body relax, her head falling on the teacher's shoulder. Swan’s arms raked around her body. She could not stop herself from crying, there was so much pain. Here, in the most unlikely of place, under the most obscure circumstances, she found complete acceptance from a stranger.

After a while, she pulled away. She wiped at her tears, shocking the teacher further when she displayed little discomfort at rubbing her bruised face. Liza knew what she had to do. Lilian's father obviously did not look after her. She silently vowed to herself that she would save this child.

Mrs Harris insisted taking Swan to the school nurse, even after the young woman assured her that she did see a doctor. The nurse was a no-nonsense African America lady. She was an old hand at handling stubborn students. Swan waited patiently as several teachers conferred over her state in the adjacent office. It was a heated, whispered conversation. The officer did not pay much attention to what was said. She listened to how it was interpreted, a chill ran up her spine as she made out the Math teacher's voice. Mr Krause was a conservative, religious, Republican. Brilliant at mathematics but lacked all the integrity and character that Mrs Harris so openly displayed to her students.

"Is it in the water? God help us all. One of these days, they are going to demand equal rights." Miss Walters, the eccentric art teacher, asked the question that was on Swan's mind. 

"What do you mean by, _is it in the water_?" He scoffed at her question. 

"I doubt that an odd duck like yourself would understand that the majority of students here, disapproves of homosexual interaction. Why do you think Emily and Jessy had no friends?" Krause liked to intimidate his fellow colleagues. His conviction was that a woman should know her place. Some of his co-workers were far too liberal and compassionate, with abominations in the eyes of God.

"Jessy's father did not raise her _that_ way. He made sure she knew that." It was all that Swan could stomach. She stormed into the office. Liza was not able to hold her back.

"You arrogant, stupid, fucking prick!" As her fist connected with the man's jaw, she felt her ring finger move. She shook her hand after she struck him, then inspected it. She was only going to get one blow in today. The man got up from the floor where he landed. His ears were ringing. He had never been struck so fiercely in his life. There was blood in his mouth, in his anger lashed out toward Swan. She ducked under his sloppy attack, then bumped her ribs into a desk. She grimaced. During his disoriented state, Mrs Harris removed him from the room. Swan was told not to move as Miss Walters went to report the incident. Swan was holding her side.

It was then that she heard Nurse Williams laugh.

"I've been waiting for the day someone put the man on his ass." She held a hand up. Swan high-fived her with a skew smile until their hands clapped together, and Swan remembered she dislocated a finger. Nurse Williams continued to drawl on in her Boston accent. Enlighten as well as entertaining Swan with stories of _the old fart_. 

The incident spread like wild-fire through the school. Swan became several student's instant hero. The minority of students support was due to their hatred of the math teacher. Most were either gay or supportive of gay rights and LBGT. When Mrs Harris came to get Swan, she gave her a quick synopsis of the morning. The few students that encountered them on the short walk from the Nurse to the Principal's office cheered her on.

 _W_ _ell, if nothing else…_ Swan thought. The next gay student might have a slightly more comfortable life. Before they entered, Mrs Harris informed her that they could not get hold of her father, but her sister was here. The teacher could see the surprise and confusion. She, herself was thoroughly taken aback when she met Lilian's sister, _Trish West_.

"My sister? Is here?" Swan's mind raced while she carefully asked. _Who the hell did Booth send and why?_ As they entered, _Trish_ stood up. Swan observed the shock on her face. It was a sudden emotional strain, increasing Regina’s breathing. No one could fake a reaction like that. _Lilian_ stopped in the doorway.

"Well fuck me, if it’s not Lady Di herself!" She made a flamboyant gesture and bowed deeply at her _sister_. When Swan stood straight once more, she saw the anger in the smouldering dark eyes. _Yup, cannot fake that either. She is pissed_.

"Lillian." Regina greeted Swan stiffly. Swan turned her attention to the principal.

"Trish offered to take you home." Swan stood unmoved in the doorway. She looked the Detective up and down as she leaned her tall frame casually against the doorframe, folding her arms, crossing her legs. Swan started to hum a tune.

"Really?" Regina asked stern as Swan grinned. She was humming _Wild Horses_ from the Rolling Stones.

"I have to admit Trish, I'm hella stoked that you even know that beat, with you digging Tchaikovsky and all." Swan clearly hit a nerve. 

"Lillian!" The single name held a warning. Swan stared her down for a bit.

"Oh well, my day cannot possibly be any more disastrous. Yadadamean?" She directed the question at Regina who continued to glare. 

"Am I expelled?" She asked the latter from the principal. The woman nodded, then informed Trish that it was for two weeks. She also indicated that she would call Social Services to have a look at Lillian's living conditions. Then she excused Lillian.

When Regina came out of the office, Swan was ready with all her things. Swan shook her head when she saw how shaken the Detective was. Mrs Harris also stayed behind in the principal's office. From the look on Regina's face, Swan was confident they had the same conversation with her as they did with Spencer. As they walk through the hall to the main entrance, Regina took Swan's backpack. Something the _teen_ opposed, eventually giving in. Letting her _big sister_ take the case. Pulling the _teenager_ into an embrace, Swan leaned into the small comfort of the embrace her _sister_ gave her. Mrs Harris watched the display. She prayed that her student would be alright.

As soon as Regina's black Mercedes was out of the school ground, Swan questioned her. 

"Where is August? Why the fuck did you come? I did not prepare for this scenario." Regina kept calm.

"You handled it well." She did not look at the Officer. Swan seemed younger and much more vulnerable in the oversized hoodie. Her face bruised.

"They informed me…" Before she completed the sentence, the officer interrupted.

"Spare me the fucking story, Detective. I already told the Captain. I am good at what I do. My butthurt is all part of the charm." She placed much emphasis on her last sentence. Challenging the Detective to contradict her.

"Emma…"

"Stop the car," Swan commanded low. 

"What? Why?" The Officer looked directly at the Detective.

"Stop the fucking car." Regina pulled over. The rookie got out. The Detective watched as she pulled out her cell phone. Waiting on the sidewalk, she got into an Uber-car. Regina sat dumbfounded. She quickly evaluated their situation. She had no idea what triggered the young woman.

***

Neither the Captain nor the Lieutenant was happy with her expulsion.

"Do I need to send you for anger management training?" Spencer yelled at her. The customarily composed Captain was furious.

"No, Sir." Swan stood straight. The way a Marine stood when a Drill Instructor informed you that you were the most incompetent recruit in the history of the Marine Corps.

"What the fuck were you thinking Swan?" Booth asked, sounding tired. 

_That he was looking for it, dumb fuck_. Her thoughts ran away from her. Regina's knock at the door was met with an exasperated, _What?_

"Sir, may I come in?" Spencer motioned her over. The three ranked Officers presided to discuss Swan, the case and the events of the morning as if she was not in the room. Mills told them what the Math teacher said, it outraged her. Spencer understood her position, he was informed about Regina's treatment from her parents. As a black man, a minority group, Spencer had been on the receiving end of prejudges before. After hearing the surrounding circumstances, Spencer eased up.

"Did you learn anything new Swan?" His voice was much calmer.

Swan briefed them on her suspicions. She explained that she deliberately _outed_ herself to Liza Harris. The information that she was trying to confirm was that Emily and Jess were gay. While she waited for Regina to join her, several students came to talk to her. One was a good friend of the pare. She confirmed the love the girls shared. She explained that according to the friend, the girls were happy, they suited each other, no one bothered them. They were discreet, but a couple of kids knew. Somehow, during the last two months, Krause was informed about their relationship. He took the news to Jessy's father. A man with the same standing and principals in life as the mathematician. Both men served as Decans in the same church. Swan paused for a moment before she dropped the bomb.

"The autopsy on Jess highlighted deep bruises on her inner thighs. The discolouration stood out during the post-mortem. The M.E. said the bruises were a few days old and had no relation to the suicide." She swallowed hard.

"Jessy was forced to break off the relationship with Emily. Renounce her and recommit herself to the will of god. The will of god, that week, was a corrective-rape. She killed herself three days later. Emily did not want to live without her love, so she followed her."

_Silence_. Swan could see each individual deal with the information differently. Regina was numb. Reflecting on her situation with her mother. Booth had a daughter the same age, he was so enraged that the effort it took from him to hold it back, made him cry. Spencer stared at Swan, as if he wanted her to say something, anything different than those words. When he finally spoke, his voice was softer.

"Alright, bring the father in. August, talk to the D.A? See what we can charge him with?" Jessy was seventeen. The corrective rape might become a statutory rape case. They needed to find out who besides the father was responsible. The Detective left. Spencer did not know what to say. It was both families that insisted the police investigate the case. The school board agreed. If there was a problem at the school, it needed to be resolved to prevent future tragedies.

"Go see a doctor for your hand." He pointed to the finger that looked more broken than dislocated. "And your ribs." It did not go unnoticed that Swan supported her ribs on her left side. "Then go home, Swan. Get some rest and put ice on your face?"

"Sir?" He gave her consent to speak. "Can I stay for an interview with the father? I will only observe." Spencer chuckled.

"Only observe?" He shook his head. "Swan, you might be capable of many things. I do, however, doubt that you will _only observe_." He thought intensely for a moment. "Thing is Swan. He will say something to upset you. You will try and storm in there to whip his ass, as I know you can," He added with a smile. 

"Problem is Officer. No one would stop you." It was perhaps the one thing that convicts and cops had in common. A zero tolerance for child rapists. Swan understood. She did not like it, but she understood. Spencer told her to stay home for three days.


	6. The connection

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My spelling in general suck, but certain mistakes are made on purpose. Like Sara and not Sarah or Shevonne and not Siobhan. There is a reason for this.  
> This story deals with a lot of racial and/or hate groups, including religion. The theme is not meant to be hurtful to anyone's race or beliefs. In other words, I do not condone racism, xenophobia or any form of discrimination.  
> 

Swan returned to duty looking better. No one knew that she did not see a doctor. Her face was still bruised, but the swelling was less. From the moment she walked into the station, she could feel vibrant energy. Something was different. A few cops that she did not know greeted her. The Desk Sergeant told her that Detective Mills was looking for her. She gave the man an exasperated look. He laughed and waved her off.

Regina was standing before the murder board. Swan, for a change, was in her police uniform, her plainclothes and undercover persona tucked away. She cleared her throat when she was close to the Detective. Regina’s eyes narrowed, looking at the younger woman. At times Swan seemed old for her age, then there were the glimpses of her vulnerability that made her look so much younger than what she was.

Regina pointed to the open case file on her desk and told the officer to sit. Out of principal, Swan took the folder and read through it while standing. The defiance did not go unnoticed. Swan handed the case back, standing with her arms crossed she waited for the Detective to tell her what she wanted.

“How did you know what he was?” Swan gave her a faint smile. _At least she was direct_.

“I read a lot.” The answer tried Regina’s patience, but she went with it. Swan explained that the Reverend wrote a book which she had read. Regina made a note to look into it. She informed the Detective that there was an open FBI file on the man and that she should contact Agent Graham Hunter on the matter. Regina held back surprise.

“Why is the FBI looking for him?” Swan considered the question before she answered. She had no intention to get involved in the case.

“Do you remember the Montana, Noxon standoff a few years back with the SOC movement?”

Regina sat back in a chair, observing the Officer. It was a massacre on both sides. Twelve law enforcement officers were killed as it was a joined operation, including The Montana Department of Justice, FBI, Sheriffs Office and local police. The raid was well planned, but intel on the number of the Soldiers of Christ were inaccurate. The swoop assault turned into a siege that lasted three days. By the time law enforcement breached the compound, most of the responsible leaders were missing. There were thirty civilian deaths and hundreds injured. 

***

At the height of the SOC movement, their numbers exceeded ten-thousand. Making it the most substantial paramilitary cult in American History. The cult differed from the People’s Temple and other Christian factions in the sense that their primary function was White Nationalism. The siege that took the cult down was shorter and more bloodied than the Ruby Ridge and the Waco siege.

The Soldiers of Christ started in Yorba Linda, near Los Angeles in California. Where LA was the scene of liberation, Yorba Linda was viewed as one of the most conservative towns in the States. A small group of religious members started to socialise casually. Their concerns over the Country, the State, the war in Iraq, new abortion legislation, bonded the friends tighter than their religious believes did. Eventually, the group grew, then relocated to Noxon, Montana. The change was not only geographical. More and more militant, National patriot and established apocalypse believers joined them. The land that was purchased in Noxon was transformed to accommodate all their members. Post-Apocalyptic chambers were built. The entire facility was self-sustaining. Farmlands provided food, solar energy was utilised, the richness of the land sustained them. The military wing continued to train members. The landscape held mountains, rivers and rugged terrain. The perfect training facility. All members knew the evacuation movements in case of the Final Judgement of Christ. They were trained in military procedures, hand to hand combat, firearm training. Everyone, men and women alike learned to hunt, were exposed to the elements, learned survival skills and off cause, the teachings of Christ.

After the SOC movement was infiltrated, it became apparent that SOC was far more than a White Christian National movement. They were compared to Sam Fife’s The move, or The Movement of God as well as David Berg’s Children of God. What started out as a small Christian group with concerns for their Country and children became a mass control, mind-altering, abusive cult. The Soldiers of Christ’s leader was David King, or as his followers called him, King David.

***

“What does SOC have to do with Reverend Green?” Swan wanted to laugh. _Did the man change that much in a decade_? 

“The fuck is David King,” Swan stated emotionless. The apparent astonishment on Regina’s face was evident. Her mind calculated Swan’s age, trying to figure where she fitted into the atrocities of the cult.

“Swan?” She questioned strained. The Officer did not show any signs of discomfort.

“As I said, I read a lot. I like true crime. Cults are a subject matter that interests me.” The answer was so clinical that Regina dismissed any concern that Swan was part of the cult. She knew with a Federal investigation open on her _victim_ , she needed to update the Captain.

“What else can you tell me?” 

Swan relaxed a bit, she hated this case. She knew Regina had already spoken to the Captain about knowing more than what she first acknowledged. She needed to keep professional on the matter, only relate facts. The last thing she needed was for her worlds to collide. She had kept her past buried, she was not going to compromise that for anyone.

“About two-hundred members of the elite escaped during the siege. Some were never found like David King. Others were eventually captured and prosecuted.” 

Swan continued to unravel some of the mysteries. The charges ranged from neglect, child abuse, molestation, sodomy, statutory rape, illegal firearms and armament against the Government. It was disarray trying to convict half the people that were charged. The most integrate parts of the cult and its functions did not immediately come to light, it was years later when the pure evil and depravity of the movement came to light. 

The aftermath of the mental and physical abuse towards the children became apparent after a few small racial motivated killings took place where kids from the movement were involved. SOC’s underlying philosophy was that if it was not Christian, white and in service of fellow men, it was wrong. Racism, anti-Semitism, Xenophobia, anti-Government, and homophobia was at the core of their teachings. 

The isolated incidents of the next generation of SOC soldiers forced the FBI to look deeper into the cult case. It was then that the majority of crimes came to light. It also entailed the deep-seated mind-control. By the time the siege was executed, the cult had immense wealth. 

Their followers included soldiers that found a home after service, Dot.com millionaires that got swooped up in the bug-out, apocalyptic phenomena, doctors, engineers. The leaders promised a structured but free life. They delivered on that. A safe, healthy environment to raise children, for the more liberal members, there was free sex, training, teachings. Everything was perfect. 

Troubled adults or children were isolated and trained by the military wing. There were the lost souls that fell for a new life, the professionals that fell due to stress. Divorced women and widows or widowers, other bereaves, the unemployed, and the homeless. They were easy targets. The Government were mostly blamed, then the racial, xenophobic and homophobic attributes would be thrown at them. Most members soon believed that these sinners were to blame for the fall down of the country and their way of life. SOC gave them new meaning, a purpose and an enemy to blame.

Over time, members would lose their autonomy, their individualism and independence. Everyone worked. The centre was self-sustained in everything, for a reason. Everyone was deprived of sleep, keeping up with exhausting work. The isolation ensured that they were cut off from the outside world. Some kids never knew there was anything beyond SOC, kept away from their usual support networks. Any retaliation and resistance were met with prayer, then work. If a member was set on rebellion, they were isolated, their food regulated, they went through extreme military training, then they were subjected to mass cleansing and prayer. Eventually, these practises filtered down to the children, subjecting them to the same insanity.

There were rewards, as well. This was where the lines crossed. Confident unreformed children were subjected to well-behaved adults for _re-adjustment_. Most of these acts came in the form of sexual abuse.

***

“The Agent in charge of the case is Graham Hunter in Washington, DC. He will tell you what you need to know about SOC and the other murders.” Regina frowned at the comment.

“Other murders? Are we looking at a Serial Killer?” Swan shook her head.

“No, Bruce Larker is locked up in Souza.” Mills knew the officer was referring to Souza-Baranowski Correctional Centre in Shirley.

“Do you have this level of knowledge on other cults?” Swan gave her the faintest of smiles.

“Would you like me to tell you the facts Children of God?” Regina held her hands up.

“No thank you, I will update the Captain, then we can make arrangements to go to Washington DC.” 

“Yeah, I will skip out on that one.” She casually informed the Detective and left. Then she turned. “Oh, and there is a lawyer. Did the lawsuit for some of the kids to settle them.” She stopped, looking tensely back at Regina.

“If King is here, there will be others. This might be the start of a killing spree.”

***

Agent Hunter confirmed everything Swan had told her. He ran a few cases with her, including Bruce Larker. He killed his parents. They relocated to Florida after Montana. Bruce was in witness protection, as most of the minors were after the movement was closed down, his real name was Jonothan Cunnings. He killed Felicity and Malcolm Cunnings. The method of killing looked much like that of Reverend Green. Except for the mutilation. Bruce had a longstanding problem with adjusting in society. 

He was eighteen when SOC was closed. The psychological abuse was to the extent that the boy isolated himself on a small farm in North Carolina. No one knew how he found his parents. He killed them, then waited for the police to show up. He did not resist. He pleaded guilty and was sentence twenty-five years for each murder to be served concurrently. Mitigating circumstances contributed to the lenient sentence. He was transferred several times due to his intolerant nature towards people of colour. They transferred him for his own safety. It was how he landed up in Massachusetts.

Hunter gave her copies of all the files pertaining to the murders. There were several others, former members that were killed by their children or kids that were rescued in Noxon. Two other murder cases displayed the same MO for which he had no reasonable explanation. Detective Mills helped him to close one more case. Simon Green, aka David King, was dead. The FBI could stop looking for the man that caused so much pain to so many. 

“You can also speak to Steven Allard. He is a Professor at George Town University. He is a specialist on cults.” Agent Hunter informed her before she left with the promise to keep him up to date with her investigation.

***

The following day Regina drove to George Town in search of the Lecturer, Hunter mentioned. Professor Allard taught Psychology, his thesis was on Applied Behaviour Analysis. Regina took a seat at the back of his lecture hall, intent on listening to the man where he was sitting on his desk, an interactive discussion was taking place.

"Sir, all serial killers are psychopaths? Not all psychopaths are serial killers. What makes people different?" Steven’s eyes lit up as he leaned forward. His demeanour changed as he encouraged the student to continue.

"You are wondering about CEO's and Politicians. _Death by character assassination_?" The student nodded. Steven had heard that phrase before, but he could not remember where. It was rare for him to forget something so profound. The Professor preceded to answer. Explaining that with specific work placements you will look for skills, that under another circumstance would be unacceptable. If you want an aggressive lawyer, you will look for attributes of a psychopath.

"Superficial charm, grandiosity, pathological lying, conning and manipulative behaviour, lack of remorse." He listed the trades on his fingers. These were all characteristics of a psychopath or a person diagnosed with APD, antisocial personality disorder.

"You can look at political leaders, Muammar Al Gadhafi, Idi Amin, Saddam Hussein, it is easy to classify them as psychopaths. In the case of Idi Amin, I would think he suffered from more than one mental disorder. These people are classified as committing genocide or in the case of Hitler, who started with ethnocide, escalated to democide and grand scale genocide. Which makes him perhaps the most fascinating case study ever. However, under the definition of democide, countries remain the biggest culprits." The students perked up a bit. “There are also much written on the subject of Countries and their blood karma. Democide of native inhabitants. Australia with the Aboriginal tribes, the British Empire with nearly all of their colonies, including America and the Native Indians.” This made more sense with the back-drop knowledge of Country-Karma.

He carried on like a man on a mission, making the lecture go much faster than before. Explaining democide was defined as any murder by governments or governing bodies acting under the authority of government. In essence, direct acts according to explicit or implicit government policy and approval of these high ranked officials. _War_. Where genocide may include government murder, in wholly or partially eliminating some groups. To inflict psychological damage. _Propaganda_. Unlawful incarceration and the control of births in these minority groups. _The Holocaust_. 

Steven amplified that basically, serial murder and genocide dated back as far as the Epic of Gilgamesh, during the Third Dynasty of Ur, 2100 BCE. The first Holocaust was perhaps also an atrocity against the Jews. _The Exodus_ during the 5th century BCE as a result of slavery, racial differentiation, killing of infants as well as suppressing the masses. The Israelites revolted against the Pharos's rule. Of course, other than the Thora, there was literary no historical evidence in Egypt that the event ever took place. 

Steven knew all this useless information because he studied every aspect of serial murder. Once he understood that most facts are from only one point of view or that history was written by the victorious, he started to cross-reference everything. It supplied him with accurate facts, but more often than not, he could only use the bulk of information for needless trivia.

"There is also the conflict of nature versus nurture?" The Professor nodded at the question. 

"Okay so here is a case scenario?" Steven sketched a profile of an abandoned baby, born out of wedlock to a whore and a repeat offender. Highlighting the nature and genetic theory. The child lands up in the foster system, is then adopted and raised in an extremist, Republican, fanatical Christian home. Exposure to a fixed belief system. By age twelve, this child complies with all serial killer trades: Bedwetting, arson, cruelty to animals and a head injury to the frontal lobe. By age sixteen, this boy had been abused, sexually, mentally, emotionally and physically, which makes him more or less immune to pain as a result of the cult-like system he was raised in. Hence, he has a warped comprehension of pain, reward and punishment. He displays no empathy when it comes to other people's physical pain because he has no healthy frame of reference. 

"During this time, he develops the art of lies, deception and stealing, utilising pathological lying and manipulative behaviour to become a serial offender." The students nodded their understanding, their minds working with the information the teacher supplied. Steven carried on with the profile. Indicating that the man has many short-term relationships. Is continuously acting out, showing the behaviour of juvenile delinquency. With sexual fantasies that would be considered offensive to even S/M relationships. Then he is drafted into the armed forces where his curiosity about killing animals turns to the curiosity of killing people. The man fights a war, in which he is hailed as a hero for killing dozens of people, with the permission of his superiors. Involving close combat and artillery, killing innocent and soldiers alike.

He waited for the room to settle before he asked the question. 

"Why is this man not a serial killer?" Regina studied him and then his class.

“I will go further. This person is living a normal life currently." He had Regina’s attention now. "He has an education, steady, responsible job. Lacking social skill, but he has a few friends. No drug use or alcohol abuse." Regina fell for the scenario, she asked her question. 

"What is his beliefs?" She asked

"He is an agnostic." The professor answered. Regina countered with her professional opinion.

“Every single aspect of this person's life and development raised a red flag. He would be a fascinating person to have a drink with." Regina thought about the man’s school of thought and her own studies. "The person you describe will have other psychological problems…"

Professor Allard interrupted her. 

"Anxiety, Achluophobia fear of the dark, Androphobia fear of men, Attention deficit disorder, Coitophobia failure to achieve orgasm, Insomnia, Latrophobia fear of doctors, Merinthophobia fear of being bound, Nosocomephobia fear of hospitals, Nyctophobia fear of what could happen in the dark, Sociophobia fear of sleeping." The Detective looked at him a little differently; he positioned the named trauma in alphabetical order. It indicated his high level of intellect. She continued their dialogue.

"Given the background of this man, none of those sounds out of place or unexpected.”

She thought about other anxieties that could cause interference, questioning whether or not the man suffered from Agraphobia the fear of places and situations, Monophobia fear of being alone, Necrophobia fear of others dying, Virginitiphobia fear of rape and depression? Allard shook his head at the inquiry.

"My conclusion would be this person is not a psychopath and therefore could never be a serial killer. His frontal lobes are likely functioning as it should. All the similarities to the psychopath would be due to the long-term abuse. If this case-profile have proper motor functions, developed problem-solving skills and impulse control, combined with the fact that he can judge right from wrong, I would think all he will require is a set of rules he can follow to keep direction away from any ill-will or criminal intent." The Professor smiled at the clinical answer.

"But why?"

Regina thought genuinely. "Your case has all the trades and possibilities to be a psychopath, repeat offender or a serial killer." Allard acknowledged it. "I would guess that something grounded him in his formative years." 

“Yes!” Steven exclaimed. “Basic needs were met during his formative years, which were re-enforced in one way or another during the abusive years.” He smiled at her, impressed. 

“And since I will only be teaching that next year, I can assume you are not supposed to be in this class, Miss?” He spotted Regina early on where she sat. Steven Allard was a cautious man, he noticed any changes in his routine.

“Detective Regina Mills, Boston PD.” She announced.

“Not to sell Boston short Detective Mills, but that explanation is hardly Police Academy study material.” Regina smiled, even though he could not see it. 

“No Professor Allard, I have a Masters Degree in Criminal Phycology.”

He asked Regina to join him at the front for the duration of the class, she was peppered with questions about the criminal mind. Afterwards, Steven Allard took her to his office.

***

Regina explained what she needed and why. The man showed no emotional reaction at hearing of the deaths of the former SOC members. He asked if he could see the photos. Regina reluctantly handed him the autopsy photos. He stared long at the face of Felicity Cunnings. Then he handed the pictures back.

“The Reverend…” He stumbled in his question. Then he looked lost at the Detective.

“Professor Allard, were you a member of SOC?” She asked it quietly, knowing that if he was, he was likely in WitSec. He made a motion with his hand, unable to continue. Regina took it as a confirmation.

“Simon Green suffered mutilation and forced anal penetration before he was killed. Since then, his life has been turned upside down. Any respect or status the man accumulated has been destroyed.” The statement seemed to calm him.

“What do you want to know Detective?” Regina laid the case out for him. She was looking for a suspect. Her regular pool of suspects increased expeditiously when it was uncovered who Simon Green really was. She asked Steven for a profile. He shook his head.

“Detective, there is much that had never seen the light about SOC. These kids were trained as soldiers by soldiers. They adapt. The killer would sit next to you, discussing the case like I am, and you would not know. In dysfunctional families, children learn early on not to trust, not to speak and not to feel. No one would willingly give up information about their trauma.”

Regina thought about it. She thought about Devan Adams, he was different. She told the Professor about the man that was traumatised and who was now helping Green’s latest victims to come to terms with it.

“No offence, Detective, but you are speaking of a man that suffered maybe two or three years of abuse, periodically. I am referring to kids that were traumatised day in and day out for a decade. With varying degrees of abuse, not limited to sexual abuse.” She conceded. He was speaking of something she could not understand on an emotional level.

“Can you explain the manner of killing?” Steven clenched his jaw.

“It’s the way you would kill an animal. After you hunt it down, you hang it upside down and slash the animal’s throat, letting the blood flow. A good hunt is celebrated by cutting out the liver and taking a bite out of it.” 

The explanation gave Regina everything she needed for a profile, the killer’s state of mind, their abilities the reasoning for the method. She now knew she was looking for a man between the ages of twenty-five to thirty-five. He would have several gun licenses. Shy, reserved, someone that would not belong to the congregation, but would have crossed paths with the Green family.

Regina changed her focus. 

“Do you know Bruce Larker?” The man denied it. She showed him a mugshot of the prisoner. It was the first time the professor showed emotion.

“He’s my brother.” The Detective watched him, the man was close to breaking down as he held the photograph in his hands. He closed his mouth with his hand to stop himself from crying. 

“Did he kill my parents?” Regina swallowed. She did not have the intention to hurt this man. Her confirmation shook him a bit.

“They were very hard on him.” The confession brought back the idea that she was looking for a victim of abuse. Someone that the system failed.

“Do you know where Shavonne Sheen is?” Regina inhaled deeply. She shook her head. 

“They called her Sara?” Again, Regina had to disappoint him. He thought for a moment. Then he surprised her. 

“If she is your killer, you will never catch her. She is too resourceful.” Regina’s mind took her to Swan.

“What is your connection to Emma Swan?” He frowned. 

“Emswan? That was where it all ended. The Christian Warriors for God. Some of the last of our members settled there. You know what happened to them.” Regina had no idea what to answer. Emma Swan was a place. They spoke a while longer. He gave her the name of the U.S. Marshal that settled him and the Lawyer that sued SOC for damages.

***

During the flight back to Logan, Regina kept replaying the conversation she had with the Professor. She did not know why she was placing Swan in the same scenario. The woman knew so much about the movement. She wondered to herself if she would have made the connection eventually. If fingerprints would have led her down this road. She doubted it. There was no reason why she needed to check the victim's background other than the obvious. It made the Detective wonder how many ordinary people were out there hiding dark pasts.

Regina entered the precinct in the late afternoon. It was Thursday, she had the weekend off. She could not wait for the week to end. The truth was that she would likely work the case until Monday. Captain Spencer could see how tired she was when she walked in. He offered her a drink, she refused it, knowing that if she had one, she likely would relax enough to put the case aside, at least for the night. She requested to see Swan’s file, Spencer had it in his desk drawer, handing it over. He asked about their work relationship. Regina was honest with him. The woman had issues, what they were, she did not precisely know.

Emma Swan's file had a lot of content. Regina instantly noticed that most of it were new. Snippets added by various colleagues. Spencer's additional information. Wood felt the need to point out that she did not have a past or an original birth certificate. Prince and Booth had looked at her file as well. There were the usual reports. Academy results and progress reports. A copy of her degree. A military report. It was the information that was not there that caught Regina's attention, more than anything. Regina was just about to start reading it when she heard the Officer.

"Late night reading?" Swan startled her. She felt like a teenager caught smoking. 

"I, I…" She was never lost for words. The officer gave her that sad half-smile. 

"Don’t believe all the shit you read in there, Detective." Regina closed the folder.

"Your language is appalling. Were you raised by wolves?" She was instantly sorry for her words when she saw the young woman's face close off. Suddenly there was no emotion to behold. 

"Wolves, no. It might have been better." Regina studied the Officer. Her eyes seemed dead.

"I mostly assume I am the only person with parental dislikes." It was a failed attempt at humour, not her strong suit. 

“Did you get what you need?” Swan asked business-like. Regina frowned.

“Truthfully, I have a lot more questions.” She nodded her understanding.

“I just ended my shift. Can it wait until tomorrow?” Regina confirmed then Swan walked off. Leaving the Detective to wonder where the conversation would lead them.


	7. The burden

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BIG shout out for my number one fan, Cheshire who is my Beta now. Hard job as I cannot spell for shit!
> 
> Some of Emma's past abuse is revealed in this chapter.
> 
> This is a fictional work that investigates aspects of discrimination, none of which I condone.
> 
> I have to add this note: This was posted 28 Feb 2020. I have sent a draft to a friend long before that. My initial drafts were about an immigrant from CAR that Emma apprehended. Please understand that I grew up in the most racist country in the world. I was perhaps naive to think our problems and that of first world countries were not the same. I can assure you that I had no idea police brutality in the US and UK were as atrocious as here. 
> 
> I thought about rewriting this chapter, but in essence, it is about Emma, protecting a child.  
> I do not condone the actions of any person that led to the unnecessary deaths of people like Breonna Taylor and George Floyd. And this chapter was not written to vindicate white cops.  
> As Regina concludes, it is due to Emma's past, a need to protects a child.

Swan’s shift started early the next day. She was assigned to Prince and Herman; they were investigating a murder involving a young suspect. The boy shot his mother’s boyfriend because the ass was beating them both. Herman thought it might be self-defence. Until the facts indicated otherwise, the suspect would be treated as a victim. He was only fourteen. She knew the drill; she was there for backup and gathering evidence afterwards.

Detective Prince and Herman identified themselves to the mother of the suspect. They asked to speak to the boy. She let them in. Swan was waiting by a police car with other officers when the boy came out, sprinting down the street.

"Shit!" Swan uttered as she wiggled out of her jacket to set off after the youth. His mother was calling his name in hopes that he would come back. Sean Herman reluctantly took out his scanner and reported the pursuit.

The boy was fast. Swan thought she lost him as he turned a few corners. She heard dispatch sending out the codes for an officer in pursuit of a suspect. Her mind was racing to seek a solution. The Massachusetts State Police patrolled the area where they were, close to Logan International Airport and it was part of their jurisdiction. She was somewhere in District A-7, not knowing anyone in A-7, she pushed her body to endure. 

All her instincts cried out to find the boy before any other cop did. She followed his lanky figure through the crowd keeping her eyes on the pale green t-shirt he had on. She sprinted down Chelsea Street, yelling to pedestrians to get out of her way. Swan heard sirens in the background. She pushed her body to move faster. Calls came in from various officers, reporting that they were on their way. She could feel her lungs burn as she ran harder gaining on the boy. She did not grasp the distance they have covered; all she was aware of was the need to reach the boy before anyone else did.

The entire pursuit was a haze of moving bodies and vehicles. Swan was unaware of the distraction she caused as numerous people were on their cell phones, reporting the chase to 911. Others took another interest. They were moving in their cars or capturing her on cell phone cameras from balconies. She noticed the two police cars stopping near the suspect, Jason Conway. Everything slowed down for her. The officers took out their firearms; they were yelling. Commuters and pedestrians alike stopped or got out of the way. All the while, the hidden cameras were on her.

She was close enough to the boy. Close enough to shoot him with her taser gun. To trip him with her flex baton. Her mind screamed at her to take action. Swan dived forward when the boy was in reach. He was not stopping. Not at her calls, neither at the officers pointing their weapons at him. She dived and tackled the boy around his waist. She closed her eyes, thinking, _this is going to hurt_.

****

Someone was live-streaming the events as they took place. Spencer held his breath as Swan tackled the boy. He could already see the news highlights: **Boston cop hurts minor in racial attack!** He cringed as his officer took the boy to the ground. There was silence in the bullpen as detectives and officers watched the action. A few men cringed as the Officer crashed to the ground with the boy. Esmeralda and Neal exchanged a look. He walked over to her, placing a gentle arm around her. "She's tougher than what she looks."

****

People were yelling. Then she noticed it was four other Police Officers. They had their guns out, pointing and instructing the boy to stop struggling. Swan got her bearings. Her ears were ringing, but she could see what was going on around her.

"Back off! Back the fuck off!" She yelled at the Officers who were there to assist her. "You are scaring him, put your guns away and back off. He's an unarmed minor!" 

One of the older Officers indicated to the others to comply as he holstered his weapon. Swan held on for dear life as Jason struggled in her arms.

"Jason, it is alright! I know what you did and why. I will not hurt you!" The boy tried his utmost to break her grip. He was crying; Swan only hoped he understood her through the haze of the circumstances.

"Jason! I know who he was, I know what he did." The boy began to cry even louder, but he stopped struggling. Swan loosened her grip. 

"It's alright, Jason; you're gonna be okay kid." She held him as he continued to cry. She loosened her grip entirely. The backup Patrol Officers moved in, but she waved them down. Everyone watched as the young Officer turned on her knees to the boy and took him into her arms. He wept openly into her shoulder as she held him.

After some time, she pushed the boy back and lifted his head as she held her hand out. Jason took it as they got up together. She placed her hand on the boy's cheek. 

"You will be alright." She lifted his face until his eyes met hers. 

"Do you understand Jason?" He nodded faintly. She wiped the tears off his face. Placing her forehead against his.

"Do not say anything to anyone until your mom and your lawyer is with you?" The boy nodded. "Jason, I have to arrest you." 

She saw the fear in his face. "I know what he did, Jason." She repeated, making sure the boy understood her. "A State lawyer and your mother will come. The lawyer will help you." He nodded once more. She wiped his face. "Good. Please turn around?" He complied with her request. She took out her cuffs and tentatively placed it around the boy's wrist. "You are under arrest for the suspicion of murder. Do you understand?"

"Yes." He finally answered in a voice that sounded far too young. She led him towards the Officer that took charge of the other men.

"Can you please read him his rights? He is a minor. Make sure that Social Services are informed. Please keep him separate from the other men." The Officer smiled at her.

"First arrest?" She shook her head.

"Please take him to HQ Homicide; no one is to interview him unless with the consent of Detective Prince and in the presence of his mother and lawyer."

The older cop looked at her. "What is the charge?"

"Murder." She answered in a dead tone. He indicated his understanding, then led the boy to the back of the patrol car as he told the minor what his rights were. It was only then that she noticed all the attention she attracted. Swan looked at the other two officers. 

"Sorry for yelling at you. Can you please give me a lift back?"

They were a few years older than herself. A short, bulky cop raised his eyebrow in question.

"You need to go to a hospital kid!" Swan frowned, then looked at her left arm where he was pointing.

"Fuck me. I did not even feel that."

****

Darren Preston had seen a lot of shit in his life. Some thought he had seen too much. Causing the talented photographer to burn out before his time. He was in search of a beer to lessen his hangover when he heard about the cop in pursuit. When he heard the suspect was black, he had already made up his mind on how this event would end. He found himself a block away from the chase and made his way over to the scene. 

What he saw confused him. The words he heard puzzled him even more. As he took his camera from his shoulder, he captured every moment, every movement. He stopped as the young officer placed her head against the even younger suspect. He did not hear her words. He was focused, perplexed by the scene unfolding in front of his lens. She was beautiful, blood smears and dirt obscured by the silent tears she was shedding with the boy. Unbeknown to her. He took the picture. In that fraction of a second, the cop he had no name for became what, so few police were, in the opinion of the public, a true American hero.

He lowered his camera, pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and called his boss. 

"Hold the frontpage Chief. I have the picture to go with the police chase story in East Boston."

****

Captain Spencer watched the slow-motion repeat of the moment capture forever as Officer Swan tackled the black boy, half her size. He shook his head in disbelief as the cops around him, hissed on behalf of the rookie. The scene played out before him once more. Swan grabbed the boy and in mid-flight deliberately turned their bodies. She held the boy close, protectively as her left shoulder and arm hit the pavement with both their weights on it. He saw as the officer skidded on the rough sidewalk, leaving behind the material of her uniform tainted with dirt and blood. Swan held on to the boy. She spoke to him. She talked until the child calmed in her arms. She held him, cried with him, then arrested him. All before she looked at her injury. Spencer breathed in deeply. He had never seen anything close to what Emma Swan just did.

Herman and Prince listened to the various calls that came in over the scanner. When the response call was, _suspect in custody, they_ both sighed with relief. Prince left his partner alone to speak with Jason's mother. Sean called in for an update on Swan. He was patched through to the unit on the scene.

"Detective, she needs to go to a hospital. Stubborn rookie refuses. She has a bad laceration on her left arm." Sean held his head in his hand as he thought about the implication of the kid's actions. His suspect was likely assaulted. He shook his head. He asked the responding officer if there was an ambulance on the way. Sean was informed that Swan was already being checked out by the EMT’s.

His phone rang. It was from Spencer. His thoughts were not to answer, then he inhaled and pressed the answer button on his smartphone. 

"Sean, where is she?" He could hear the hesitation in the Detective’s voice. "Sir…"

"Look, Sean, I have a media shit storm on top of me. Keep her away from the office until I can deal with this." The conversation died in his ear. _What on earth did you do?_ He questioned as he turned to inform his partner that he was on his way to pick up Swan. Jason’s mother was hysterical. Prince was also on his way with the mother. Updates told him that Jason was at the Station. They needed to interview the boy.

***

Spencer called Regina to instruct her to go to the scene. The Precinct was in chaos, while he knew Swan would need assurance and assistance from a senior cop. Regina was the obvious choice, but she was out on a case. Spencer gave her a summary of the situation, asking her to report to the scene. She and Sean stopped near the secured scene at the same time; they exchanged a look.

“What did she do?” Sean asked, fearing the worst. Regina shook her head.

“She apprehended the suspect without any injury to him.” Her words made Sean frown deeply.

Regina approached the ambulance; she was ready to take the rookie's head off when one of the EMT’s moved. She and Sean had a full view of Swan’s injury. Regina saw the state she was in. 

"Jesus!" Her eyes raked over the younger woman looking for a reason for the level of blood that was on the officer.

"Are you alright?" She asked, all the anger dissipated from her voice and body.

"I didn't know you care," Swan answered with a smirk. The EMT’s looked at the Detectives, explaining the injuries. Swan needed to go to a hospital; they feared that she might have broken something. At the news, Swan started protesting.

“I was hit with halve a Humvee in Afghanistan; this does not even hurt; I am not going to a hospital!” Sean oversaw her. She was tense and ready to bolt. He had seen it before. Nosocomephobia. Vets that came back at times had PTSD regarding injuries. They formed a fear of doctors or hospitals, associating their overall trauma only with a particular injury. Swan’s mention of the Humvee made the Detective think the phobia was applicable. His phone rang. Regina noticed the relief in his shoulders. Regina's mind was racing. She has never been in this type of situation. When a cop was hurt, they got checked out. There were procedures.

"Yes!" It was Cassidy; Sean knew the man served with Swan. "Cassidy, Swan, needs to go to a hospital, and she is refusing." Silence met him. "Cassidy?"

"How badly is she hurt Detective?" Sean inhaled, war obscured a person’s opinion of the severity of injuries. He shook his head.

"Does it matter? She needs to be checked out!" Regina was furious with the men discussing the situation instead of acting. When Neal spoke once more is voice was a whisper. 

"Detective, she hates hospitals. In all the time I have known her, she has been in hospital once. She nearly lost her arm, she needed surgery." He went quiet. "Detective, she does not react well if she is pushed. Please, please do not take her to a hospital?" 

Sean realised that if the Cop suffered from Nosocomephobia, the trauma occurred before she was deployed. It made his worry instantly increase. Swan refused any anaesthetic, an indication that she wanted to be conscience. She was not going to let anyone take control of her. The EMT's were also struggling to cut her shirt off.

"Neal, what is the alternative?" Sean could hear the relief in his voice. 

"A GP will do. She will see a doctor. Gotta go, it is a fucking mess down here." 

The detective felt an uneasiness. He did not have any of the information he would generally have. His charge was not going to tell him what happened, but he was starting to fear for the worst. Next to him, Regina displayed her fury. She could not believe what she heard. 

Who refuses to go to a hospital if they are seriously injured? Sean looked at her pleadingly. They were not going to the hospital. Defeated, Regina made the call. She did not share the conversation with the injured woman. The concern was increasing in her stature as she listened. Swan observed the dark, soft curls shaking in denial as the conversation continued. The woman stood utterly still for a while. Whomever she had spoken to, must have given her more information on the events of the morning. She ended the call and fiddled with her phone. She looked at the events playing off on the small screen. The YouTube video she picked had a slow-motion replay of Swan's dive. She watched in horror as the rookie's shoulder connected with the ground, the movement that propelled her and the boy a few feet forward.

The golden-head smashing hard into the sidewalk. Without realisation. The detective inhaled sharply. She looked for any indication of Swan's pain; there was none. Not a flinch, a sneer or a cry. She opened another video from a different angle which she shared with Sean. This one was from behind. It showed Swan's left side; one could see how her uniform was ripped open, the blood instantly streaming from her arm. The boy did not have a scratch on him. Regina held her breath as the emotional scene played out in front of her. 

At some point, Swan wiped a tear with her bloodied arm, creating a haunting display of blood mixing with tears and dirt on her soft features. Regina thought about her potential partner and the look she held most of the time. The compassion she saw in the video was an unknown factor in the kid with the _I-do-not-give-a-shit-attitude_.

She had no awareness of the tears brimming in her eyes until they fell. Regina looked up to see Swan observing her. The same nonchalant attitude she always displayed. The detective wanted to say something, anything. She, however, closed her mouth with her fingertips, stopping a sob from escaping. Sean attempted to place an arm around her, which she discouraged with a look. He had never before seen Regina so shaken. He did not comprehend Swan’s actions, but he understood the young cop’s unwavering reaction to being hurt.

“Oh, for fucking christ’s sake, it’s a scratch!” Swan lifted herself out of the ambulance. She wanted the woman in her arms but did not attempt to move. She did not say a word; she did not attempt to ease Regina's pain, whatever it was. She only held the older woman's gaze. Swan wanted to slip her hand into the tantalising mane and held her head in a place on her shoulder. She wanted to feel the soft curls fall over her hand. She had wondered what it would feel like, pondered about more than that... But she guessed, with them, the little common ground that they had was so fragile. She thought and knew this would be as close as she would get. With them, she would only ever wonder about the woman she stared down at that moment, trying to convince her she was alright. Regina's eyes flared anger, liked it did so often. _Serious eye-fucking_ , Swan thought and gave Regina a soft smile. She could smell her distinctive sent. Swan closed her eyes. She smelled so good.

Sean watched them, wordlessly. Regina was there to comfort the Officer, not the other way around. For a moment he wondered if there was more to it, then he dismissed it. He knew from Prince that Spencer was planning to partner them. Sean Herman recalled Regina’s first partner. Perhaps it was a reaction to that situation. He knew Daniel Colter was never injured on duty. It might have been Regina’s own deep-seated trauma towards a cop being injured. 

When she saw Regina distancing herself, Swan moved her hand to cup the soft cheek. Sometimes, when Regina smiled, or when she was beyond annoyed, her dimples would show. Swan rubbed her thumb tenderly over the indentation. Appreciating the smile while fondly wiping the tears from the smooth, unblemished features. She felt the tightness in her stomach. The desire to kiss Regina was almost overwhelming. She instantly pulled back.

Regina leaned into the comforting touch. She was trying to remember when the last time was that a woman touched her like this. _Her soldier_. Then Swan pulled away. She gave her superior officer that boyish lopsided grin. 

"We should get back to the station." Regina was not quite ready to let go of their moment. She reached for Swan's hand. There was no hesitation as their fingers laced together.

"The Captain instructed that Detective Herman and I need to keep you away from the station. Besides we need to get you to a doctor." The eyes that were usually so closed off penetrated the brown ones. Conveying to Regina the importance of the trust she now gave to her. The words fell over her lips, she had no intention to say them, but once they were out, Regina realised she meant it.

"It is alright; I will stay with you." Swan did not answer, she squeezed the fingers in her hand, untangling them as she turned back to the EMT’s.

***

Regina and Sean followed the ambulance to the M.E’s office. Swan accepted her choice of doctor wordlessly. She briefly discussed the Officer’s reluctance to receive proper medical care with Herman. He admitted his theory to her. It made a margin of sense. It confirmed why the young woman hated hospitals. Why she showed no pain or discomfort. Regina thought it might have been the adrenaline, however, as Swan pulled on her uniform jacket over the open wound, that she dismissed as a graze, there was no emotion or response to what Regina determined, must have hurt. She had more questions about the woman than the day before. She decided to talk with Cassidy. She knew they were in Afghanistan together, and not much more.

***

Doctor Lucas was not impressed with her patient. After informing her what she needed, Swan looked at her with stubborn persistence.

"I do not need an X-ray or CT scan. I do not have a concussion or a broken any fucking thing!" Neither woman understood the severe defensiveness of the injured cop.

"A few days and I already forgot how charming you are." The sarcasm did not escape Swan. She has been arguing with Doctor Lucas and the detectives for the better part of ten minutes now. At first, she was relieved they took her to the M.E. At least it was a doctor that she had met. Neal also spoke highly of her. Their continued persistence that she needed a full examination was the cause for Swan to lash out.

"Who has the medical degree?" Red folded her arms, standing her ground.

"I have had a concussion before. I know the difference between a headache and rattled brains! Broken ribs hurt like a motherfucking bitch. I assure you, I do not have broken ribs."

Sean watched the situation. He did not have Regina’s psychological knowledge, but he understood Marines.

“Lance Corporal! Get your shit together! I will have you on a desk for the rest of your life if you disobey a direct order again.” Swan stiffened.

“Yes, Sir,” She answered defeated.

Sean told the women that he needed to leave. It gave Regina a moment with Red. The Detective told Red why she wanted a full scan on Swan. The M.E found the initial request from her friend intriguing, now, however, with the Officer's continued protest, she found that she agreed. Swan was hiding an injury. There were no medical reports in her file that mentioned broken ribs or a concussion. Regina made a mental note to get hold of Swan's private medical records.

"I am logging this in your file. Your refusal for proper medical attention!" Swan said nothing. Red continued to rant as she meticulously set out every instrument she would need. 

"You are selling yourself short Doc."

"Swan, I work on dead people!" Swan raised a questioning eyebrow, to which Doctor Lucas merely threw her hands in the air, mumbling under her breath, remarks about insanity.

"Besides Doc, the difference between dead and alive is only one heartbeat." Red was ready to scold her once more until it occurred to her that the woman was quite correct.

"I do not know if that is deep or depressing." The doctor responded. She looked at the _graze_ on Swan's upper arm. She touched a deep laceration with her gloved finger. The EMT's managed to stop the bleeding with compression bandages. Red did not like what she was seeing. She wanted to measure Swan's pain level. The cop did not flinch when she touched the open wound or the large graze accompanying it. 

Concern grew on the doctor's face. She turned to the Detective who was busy between calls and looking at the updating news on the event of the morning. Regina caught the Doctor’s troubled look. She stepped away from Red's desk to view the injury for herself. Swan was sitting on an examination bed, in Red's office, down the hall from the autopsy room. Regina observed her for any discomfort or anxiety. There was none now that neither of them forced the issue of x-rays. The Officer seemed calm and relaxed. There were no traces of her discomfort. Red pressed on the torn skin, indicating with her eyes for the Detective to watch the patient. The women stood back, frowning at the kid.

"What?" She questioned innocently.

Regina bit her lips together, pulled on some gloves, then pushed two fingers into Swan's side. The place where she felt the lump at her flank when she tried to inspect for broken ribs after the fight with Prince. The slightest of flinches crossed the kid's face.

"Take your shirt off?" It was a simple, logical request to which the officer, reacted. Her body froze. "Wha…What?"

Red pitched in. "It was not a complicated request, Officer Swan. Can you comply?"

"Fuck me! No! No taking off any clothes! I expect at least one date before the clothes come off!"

Regina narrowed her eyes. _Defence mechanisms. Anger, inappropriate humour and vulgarity_. Regina was beginning to identify the signs. _What makes a Marine so scared?_ Regina stepped in. She approached the younger woman where she was pulled back on the examination bed. Swan pulled herself out of reach from the women. She was sitting with her back pressed against the wall. Her eyes were flicking between the doctor and the detective. Her features were tense, her body strained. Regina approached her with slow movements. Her instincts told her that the officer was in full flight mode. She barely understood the reason for the sudden change. _Like the time in the locker room_. Regina thought.

She stopped her advance directly in front of Swan. She watched as the younger woman clenched down on her emotions. Fists balled, that tight grip she held on her façade of fear. Regina slowly pulled Swan's black shirt out of her pants, then unbuttoned it, one button at a time. Her eyes never left the hazel once. She saw the young woman's discomfort, her excessive breathing, the paralysing fear. Before she pulled the shirt off Swan's shoulders, she touched her face gently. 

"I will not hurt you." The words were meant to calm her partner; she instantly became aware that Swan was about to bolt. She grabbed the cop's face. 

"Swan, look at me! Look at me?"

She slightly shook the woman, forcing her to look back. There were tears in her eyes.

"Jesus Swan?" Her breath caught as she watched the agony in the young woman's eyes.

"It will be alright!" The younger woman looked down. Regina lifted her head back up.

"You will be alright. I will be here. I promise I will not judge you." It was all she could think of. The Officer was uncomfortable.

 _What could be so horrible?_ Regina wondered as she indicated her intention with the torn uniform. Swan swallowed hard but nodded her consent. Regina removed the shirt. Leaving Swan to sit in a long-sleeve T-shirt. The days were still warm in July. There was no need for a long-sleeve vest as they witness the perspiration on Swan's chest and armpits. Her breathing was now irregular while she tried to keep her mind occupied.

_Nathan Georgepold - 210, Rodney Alcala 170, Ted Kaczynski - 167, Charlene Gallego - 160, Carroll Edward Cole 152, Andrew Cunanan – 147, Edmund Kemper - 145, Jeffrey Dahmer - 144, Stephen Christopher Stanko 143, Dr Harold Shipman - 140, Lawrence Bittaker 138, Ted Bundy - 136_. She listed the names of notorious killers according to their IQ.

Red observed the entire event, it was not only the dead she understood. It was also the living. Regina Mills had one critical flaw. It was misconceived as arrogance, indifference or purely being a cold-hearted bitch. It was ignorance. She grew up privileged and protected. She never saw the ugliness of the world, never knew how the other side lived, survived. Neither did Ruby, but she could see it now.

She had seen the same fear in people's faces while completing her residency. Regina has seen it too, in victims. The Detective could not fathom the head-strong, rebellious officer as a victim, she saw her as intense and passionate. Therefore, it never occurred to Regina that Swan might not be. It told her a lot about the newly formed, fragile relationship. She thought back to the day she picked Swan up from school. The discussion she had with the teachers. The implications that Swan dismissed as just doing her job well. Abused children displayed similar behaviour. Regina swallowed the lump forming in her throat.

She took the scissors from the table Red had set up before she started the examination on Swan. Everything was ready to place stitched in the torn arm. Regina wanted to cut the entire shirt off. Her awareness of Swan's discomfort made her stop the moment the young woman pulled away. Red scrutinised the reaction. Her patient did not indicate any uneasiness towards her injury, she protected her body. The doctor considered dozing the officer. Then she stepped forward, taking the scissors from Regina.

"Wow, that was almost sexy if it was not so dramatic." Red used Swan's coping skills, and it worked. She saw the Officer relax a bit. 

Regina moved out of the doctor's way, but her hand remained on Swan's thigh. She felt the younger woman shake under her touch as she and the Doctor exchanged a look. Red took the injured left arm. Holding on firmly. She cut the sleeve open where it was torn and red-stained. She exposed the muscular arm from the elbow to the shoulder. The deep bruising was starting to discolour. From the light purple, Red knew it was injured muscle tissue. She pulled on Swan's wrist, stretching her arm, feeling the movement of the muscles in her shoulder. She traded another disturbed look with the Detective. The Doctor moved the Officer's arm, placing her fingers on the shoulder socket. 

"Swan does this hurt?" She asked, concerned. The young woman looked at her in utter confusion.

"In comparison to what?" Neither older women were prepared for the question. The Detective swallowed, then added her limited knowledge of Swan's injuries.

"She was shot in the shoulder." Red nodded, then pulled the torn vest more to the side. She could not see all the damage. She stood back, contemplating her next move.

"Can you turn a bit please?" Swan complied, giving the Doctor more access to the exit wound. Red frowned. She had never seen an injury like this. She felt expertly around the tissue and muscles in the kid's shoulder. "Does any of this movement hurt you?" Swan only shrugged. Her body seemed deflated. "I am going to inspect your ribs now. Can you please lay down?"

Swan closed her eyes as she adjusted her body on the bed and lay on her right side. Regina intuitively took her hand. Swan turned her face away from the women. Another look of concern passed between friends. 

"Tell me if anything hurts?" Swan remained quiet. 

The Doctor observed that she did not display any discomfort when she moved around, her fingers went to the exact spot Regina described to her, where she felt the lumpy flesh through the material of the T-shirt. She indicated to Regina what she was going to do next. Regina held on to her hand a little tighter.

Swan instantly knew what was about to happen, as she hid her face into the bed. She did not want to see their expressions, knowing what would be there, the sympathy and misconceptions of the neglect. She willed her mind to go to a safe place, her body was purely a body. There was nothing she could do about her physique being invaded, yet again. Her mind she could protect. It came as natural as breathing, curling her badass Marine soldier securely around the broken sixteen-year-old inner-child. No one could hurt her now.

Red lifted the shirt to just under Swan's bra as the women looked at the toned body, not understanding the protests. Swan’s body was covered with a tribal Dragon tattoo over her left side and part of her back. Red moved Swan's pants down a bit to experience the full view of the fantastic art. She traced gentle fingers over the incredible, menacing print. Then her movement stopped.

"Oh Jesus," She whispered.

Swan lay crushed on the bed as Regina held her hand in an almost vice grip, noticing what the medical examiner felt. The silence that filled the room told Swan all she needed to know. Red pulled the shirt down then turned away. She had her anger to deal with now.

"Swan?" Regina's voice was soft and close to her ear. 

"It is alright." She placed her hand under the woman's shirt. Her warm fingers seeking out the young woman's left side. Tracing patterns over the roughness of the abused skin, where the Dragon protected her pain. The recent, angry red scar, an apparent war wound, was not covered with a tattoo, almost as if the soldier in her was proud of it. It ran from just below her ribs, disappearing under her pants. Swan pulled herself into a foetal position. Trying her best not to cry as soft fingers attempted to ease the pain that lay more profound than the visible scars.

Swan fell asleep. The stress, pain and emotional fatigue taking its toll. Red used the time to inject her with a sedative and pain-killers. 

"This is not in her file," Red stated the obvious softly as she looked at the sleeping form. Regina shook her head. 

"No, neither is it in her military file." The older woman looked back at the sleeping officer. "How old are those injuries?" The doctor shook her head.

"It is hard to tell. Even without the tattoo covering it." She wiped a stray tear. "It's old, that much I can tell you." She threw her hands up in a frustrated manner. Her emotional connection to Regina and Swan was one of the reasons she liked to work with the dead. _The living…god, that was for other physicians_. 

"She was a child when it happened." The Detective indicated her understanding.

"What caused it?" She saw the emotion in the Doctor's eyes. She closed her eyes with one hand.

"Beatings, burns, infection. God knows." Her mind was trying to catch up with the suffering a young Swan would have lived through.

"You need to get her personal medical file. There would be more." The word got stuck in her throat. But she knew from experience. Child abuse was not an isolated incident. Swan would have more scars, fears and defence mechanisms.

"What now?" Red shook her head, then pulled her raven hair into an untidy ponytail. 

"Fuck knows! It explains her defensiveness." 

_It explains a lot more than that!_ Regina acknowledged to herself. _The shower, the anxiety, the caution around people. The fact that she protected a murder suspect because he was still a child_. She should have seen it earlier. There were so many signs pointing to trauma. 

"You need to get someone here that she trusts. I would guess there are very few people in her life that holds any trust. We do not know how she will react to waking up here, or any place unfamiliar to her."

Regina agreed with the assessment, so she took Swan's phone. It was old, had no pin request. The background was generic. Nothing personal about it in the least. The Detective scrolled through the contact list, looking for Neal. It was the only name she remembered offhand. Neal was not listed as a contact. In fact, Regina stood lost with the phone in her hand. There were quite a few names, they were all in code. _Asshole1, Asshole2, Asshole3, Bad Babe_. The Detective recognised her own number under _Shit Hot_ and Red's as _Cute Doc_. It was so Swan. Every aspect private, concealed. Red came to stand next to her, trying to see why Regina has not made a call yet. She snickered, took the phone and scrolled through it.

"Well, _Shit Hot_ , there might be hope for you yet!" Regina shook her head.

"She calls Asshole3 the most." The Doctor confirmed. Regina pressed the call button. Before she could talk to whomever, _Asshole3_ was, her attention was deflected to the door.

"Is she full of shit?" Both women turned towards the booming voice. Regina tensed as she watched the approaching man. He was imposing in size, walking in with a superior attitude. He did not bother to take his shades off or introduce himself. The moment Red protested his unannounced entrance, Regina pulled her back. The ballcap and sunglasses did not hide his identity from the Detective. As Regina pulled her back, Red could make out the gun nudged into his belt at the small of his back, covered with the Henley he had on. He walked over to Swan, where she was sleeping on the examination bed. He rubbed her cheek gently, then pushed a strand of the sandy hair behind her ear. He bent to whisper to her as he gently pulled her from her sleep. He watched her breathing change as she opened her eyes. His big hand cupped her face, then he straightened. 

Red thought he was even more daunting than before. At six-four, with brought and muscular shoulders he was imposing. His thick, bulging upper arms crossed as he came to stand a distance from the women. At Regina's height, she met him at his chest. Red started to protest his presence. The Detective held her firmer. Then the Doctor saw the Detective had her other hand on her weapon. 

The man saw it as well, choosing to ignore it. He turned to the cop on the bed. Pulled a chair closer, positioning himself close to where Swan was laying on her back now. He took off his Ray-Ban and adjusted his wire-rimmed glasses he pulled from a case in the pocket of his jeans after he helped himself to a pair of gloves. Red watched with caution and rebellion as he took her equipment, getting ready to place the stitches in Swan's arm. 

The kid was still, her body relaxed. There was none of the wariness of a few moments before with the women. He pressed the broken skin a bit for an assessment, noticing it was still bleeding. He indicated to Red to have a look. Regina's eyes were moving between the man and Swan. She was wired, ready for any movement that caused her alarm. His voice was softer, lower, as he calmly spoke to the Doctor. 

"I think she would need a few internal stitches?" Red's body language instantly changed. Regina's reaction had made her wary of the man, but at his calm reasoning, she hit back, entirely professional. 

"She needs to be in the hospital! Have X-rays, antibiotics and observation, not to mention probable surgery if she harmed the tendons and not the muscles alone!"

The man placed the first stitch in Swan's arm without any protest from the cop. The doctor looked at her patient. Swan did not cringe. He set the second stitch in, expertly looping the surgical wire twice around the tweezers, before pulling the needle through, cutting the ends of the sturdy knot. Dabbing at the blood that was now seeping freely from the wound. Regina watched with apprehension when Swan tried to get up. Her face closed off in pain.

"Relax Swan, please? Can I give you anything? How much does it hurt?" Swan remained quiet for a moment.

"Swan, Doctor Lucas asked you a question." His voice was assertive. "Does it hurt more than half a Humvee sticking out of your dumb ass?" Swan rolled her eyes. Ruby and Regina stood shocked at the question. When she answered, however, they had no idea what to do or say.

"Not even close." He nodded, indicating for Red to take over.

"More than a gunshot?" He could see the woman thinking.

"No, it feels more like a stab wound." He nodded his head. Deliberately moving between Regina and Swan, turning his back towards the cop whose hand was still on her firearm. Red was closing the first of the lacerations. Her mind could not comprehend what she heard. She was tending to a wound, which hurt as much as a stab wound, without any anaesthetic. Her patient, at ease with the level of pain. The man settled himself back in a chair amused with the state of the older women. He started a natural conversation with Swan. She gave him one of her rare genuine, smiles. 

Regina eased up at the familiarity, realising that there was no threat, despite who the visitor was. She focused her attention on Red, who was closing the second more profound tear. The detective counted fifteen stitched in the first cut. She half-listened to the conversation, her eyes were more focused on the officer, the ease she seemed to have with the man. The casual discussion laced with curses, she, herself has never heard before. They both laughed. Carefree laughter of children, it made the detective wonder about the officer. She has not heard the sound previously, not in the month's Swan has been at the Precinct. She looked towards the man. 

He was attractive, a strawberry shine to his blonde-brownish hair, almost the same eyes as Swan. His Boston accent was tainted with a slight Irish tone. For a moment, she wondered if she read Swan wrong, but dismissed the thought when she reminded herself of the intensity of their touch. Swan was definitely into girls. It muddled the question of her relationship with this man. Regina could see the love in his eyes. They were soft, tentative on Swan. There was no question, the man felt love for the woman. 

As Red finished up, Regina's attention returned to the injury. Swan's reluctance to be examined. She decided to take a chance. 

"Can you please have a look at her head and ribs Mr Scarlet?" Red pulled too hard on the knot she was finishing off. Swan yelped.

"Ouch, Doc! Will was more tender than you." The doctor, to her credit, composed herself after the realisation of who the man, in her examination room was. 

"Officer, I usually do my stitching zig-zag with a thick needle and butcher's twine. My patients never complain." Swan roared with laughter. Will shared her ease.

"I like her." He commented dryly to his friend. Regina continued to watch distrusting for Will Scarlet to act on her request. Red frowned after she was done as Will handed her his backpack.

"There are waterproof plasters in there." He indicated to the bag, deciding that Regina would shoot him if he tried to take it out himself.

While the doctor cleaned Swan's arm once more from the dried blood, Will pulled Swan up into a sitting position. He knocked her on the head with his knuckles.

"Serious dude?" She wanted to rub the spot where her head bounced on the sidewalk. Will did it for her. 

"Quite the egg you have on your noggin." He observed, then held two fingers up in front of the stubborn woman. "How many am I holding up?" She showed him her middle finger, adding that she saw just one.

"Headache?" He questioned unfaced by her rudeness.

"Sure." She answered. 

"Nauseous?"

"Yes, Asshole, all the time when I am in your company. I do not have a concussion." He shook his head, placing his hand on her side, probing her ribs with his strong fingers. He was far more in tuned with Swan's micro-expressions than the women. He noticed a slight intake of breath. He prodded harder. "Fuck me, Will, do you want to break them?"

"When are you going to learn, Psycho Bitch? Your fucking ribs are broken! Jesus! We are trying to help you!" Regina saw the fury in his eyes. She was confident, it was not the first time he had this conversation with the girl. It made her question their relationship. She estimated that Will Scarlet was a friend or rather someone that knew Swan well. Given her formulation of Swan's state of mind and defensiveness, this information was alarming to the detective.

"And exactly what can you do about broken ribs William?" The question was valid, he calmed a bit at hearing his full name from her lips. _She's pissed_. When he stood in front of her, taking her face into his hands, his sheer size dwarfed Swan.

"You have broken them before. Your body is not indestructible Lass. One day…" He swallowed the thickness in his voice. "Swan, one day, you are going to hurt yourself, Lassie. I know how strong you are, but we are friends. You need to trust someone Swan?" Regina watched as Swan cringed at the words _trust_ and _friends_.

_That was it_ , Regina though, _trust_. _This cop did not trust people_. She thought about her remark earlier that was met with an urgent flight response. _I will not hurt you_. Emma Swan had heard those words before. Heard them from someone she trusted. That trust was broken, Swan got hurt. Regina knew it would not be the kind of abuse that was covered by the dragon tattoo. Whip marks, cuts, burns. The same area likely healed long ago from angry, physical assault. The only witness of such abuse, the hardened scar tissue she felt that first time she inspected Swan's ribs. The sheer weight of this woman's past, whom she still saw as a kid, pressed down on her heart. It filled the detective with rage; she did not quite understand. 

Swan reluctantly nodded her understanding. "I don’t have a concussion, but four ribs hurt. I think I landed on a rock or a brick." The admission came out soft. 

"Good girl," Will answered as he ruffled her hair. Something that obviously annoyed her and was the reason why he did it. They acted like siblings. It was not the kind of interaction Regina was familiar with, being an only child.

"Take off your sweats?" Will instructed as he reached for his backpack to get bandages to wrap her ribs with. Regina was half relieved to see the tension back in Swan's body. Will ignored it, requesting in a stern voice for her to do what he asked. Swan did not have a chance to back out as Red took the scissors, cutting the vest off, frightened that Swan would tear the new stitches by removing it herself if she did not act. Swan had an attractive body. She was toned, tanned and still held the femininity of a woman. Will heard the intake of breath, feeling Swan’s tension as she clenched her fists in rebellion.

"Swan, give her a moment to breathe. Keep still, I want to see how much swelling there is?" 

Swan did as instructed. Red was not expecting the additional scarring on the young officer's body. She steadied herself, and when she proceeded, there was more confidence in her movements. Regina was taking mental notes from their visual observation as Swan had other smaller scars. Will kept himself busy with the few things he took out of the backpack, allowing the women to take in the state of Swan’s body. Red frowned as she watched the man displaying the items, he brought with him, including several gel-packs.

"You certainly came prepared." He looked at her.

"I know Swan." A simple answer, a simple truth. Before he helped Swan with the tatters of her vest, he turned to the doctor.

"I would appreciate doctor-patient confidentiality regarding Swan?" It was a soft request. The undertone of the importance was not wasted on the doctor. 

"Mr Scarlet, I am not that kind of doctor. I am a Forensic Pathologist!" He gave her his most charming smile. Swan rolled her eyes, she knew, however, how useful that smile was with women.

"I am afraid dear Angel, you will be Swan's GP from now on and as such, I must insist on your discretion?"

"Mr Scarlet…" He smiled once more. Swan could already see how the doctor was melting towards his charms. 

"Please call me Will?" Red inhaled deeply.

"Will, I answer to the State of Massachusetts." He indicated his understanding.

"I respect that Doctor Lucas, but you are a physician before you are a State employee. I am not asking you to break the law. I am asking you to respect Swan's privacy?" She inhaled. She knew if any other person, besides a Scarlet, or an associate, asked her that question, she would do it without an interrogation. Her heartbeat raced.

"I have to report anything untoward." His radiant smile made her heart beat a little faster.

"I do not expect anything other than that from a professional like yourself, my only request is to keep anything, not related to the case, to yourself?" She knew she could not promise him that, but she nodded. Red had no understanding of the fear in Swan's eyes. And it was fear, not shame. She was certain that Swan did not even know why she was shaking from the nameless fear. Red told her to lay on her side. She inhaled as the extend of Swan’s scars became evident. Swan tensed significantly. The Doctor instead questioned Swan about the gunshot wound in her left shoulder. It was Will that provided the necessary detail of the injury. 

"Swan was shot at a range of about twenty to twenty-five feet, with an assault rifle. She should have lost her arm, but at the time she carried a Nessmuk on her back that she _acquisition_ ," as Will phrased it. That was the reason for the exit wound. It looked more like an IED injury than a gunshot. Then she questioned the burn on Swan's back.

"That one was an IED," Swan confirmed. The Doctor opened her mouth to ask about the shadow burn surrounding the scarring. Will took her hand lightly and shook his head. He knew it was one of Swan's deepest scars. The shadow burn was caused by Ranger, where his body was secured behind Swan. The shrapnel that caused the scarring to look like the shape of a child-like drawing of a five-point-star, was what killed Ranger. 

There were other injuries as well, including the suicide attempt, that did not escape the Doctors observant eyes. The tattoo-covered it well, but Red could see it was one cut, deep, vertical and likely with a sharp instrument. There were no hesitation marks on the straight cut, the injury received medical treatment. It was the other variations of scar tissues that convinced Ruby the traumas were never treated. She felt the lump between Swan's rib-muscles as the cop grimaced, then offered up little information. 

Even Will tensed as she told them she was stabbed there with a short dagger, about an inch long. It was meant to hurt, to injure, not to kill. Ruby pointed out that one stab would not cause the damage she was feeling. Swan looked at her. Red could not say what her expression was. _Anger, disgust?_

"I did not say I was stabbed once. More like once a month." Red shared a look with Will. Regina was taking mental notes. She would see that whoever hurt the girl would be prosecuted. 

"Who hurt you like this?" She asked the question too soft. Swan could feel the pity in it. That angered her more than anything.

"I was fighting." The younger woman answered short. Will knew it was the end of the discussion. He indicated to Red to continue with the broken ribs. Swan hid in her mind, it calmed her and allowed the Doctor to inspect her without further anxiety. Her head dipped suddenly. Swan seemed to be unaware of the sedative taking effect. When she leaned back on the bed, Red let her. They studied the officer for a few moments.

"Over there, on that bed." Red was the first to shake out of it. Will lifted his friend and placed her on a different bed as Red moved to get the portable x-ray machine out of the corner of the room where it was stored. Regina helped Will position Swan as Red instructed. He looked at Red. The tension in his shoulders did not go unnoticed. 

"Her hands first," Red announced. Her logical estimate was that if Swan had so many injuries, she might have fought back at some point. If she did not, the doctor dreaded to think how much damage had been done to the girl's mind. Regina picked up her friend's reluctance in an instant.

"She will kill us if she wakes up?" The doctor stated to no one in particular. Will smiled with much relief, knowing they understood Swan’s privacy. He would always be guarded by this new addition to Swan's trusted friends, but he was already in action.

"Belief me Doctor Lucas, this is the only way you will ever get all the information you require, as before however…" His words trailed off. "Please do not put this into her file?" For a moment, Regina tensed. Red visibly shuddered.

"Dear god, this gets worse, doesn’t it?" He nodded grimly.

"Will you be alright?" He touched the doctor's shoulder softly. She confirmed that she would be. Mentally readied herself for what she knew, she might likely find. Without removing his hand, he added. "I know about a few things. I did the triage on her shoulder…" He stopped. 

Regina braced herself, suddenly she understood. Swan was hiding additional injuries.

"Jesus!" Her response drew the attention of Will. _How bad was it if Will Scarlet thought it horrific?_ Aloud she voiced her relief. "You are a Medic? A Marine medic, that is how you know Swan?" Her relief was short-lived as Will denied it, smiling at her terminology of a Corpsman.

The detective's enquiry did give him hope, however. He full well understood why Swan kept her past from the woman. He already saw it in the doctor's eyes. A sadness, sympathy, attributed to women mostly. He hid his emotions better. Swan would never know the pain her past injuries caused him. She would never know of the drunken crying fit he had after he gained knowledge about some of her scars. His mind could not even conceive the emotional trauma that went with most of the injuries.

It did, however, make him more determined to protect the young girl. That was what he heard in Regina's question. She wanted a justified reason for a cop being friends with him. Anything would be better than the alternative, which he assumed, the detective already considered.

"No, but I did meet Swan during her deployment." His answer quenched the anxious thoughts Regina had about their connection from the moment he walked into the examination room, his sheer presence, calming her new partner.

"In other words, she has war injuries?" She instantly saw the regret in their faces. Her mind caught up. The tentativeness Swan displayed towards her because of her fear. The fall she took to ensure a child did not get hurt. Swan understood these things, that was the reason why she was so intuitive. 

"Alright," Regina said softly, nodding her head with vigour as if to convince herself.

"I want to see it? All of it." Her mind was already adjusting. Readying it for the worst. Her jaw was set, anger blistering off her in waves. Will watched the struggle, it was not unlike his own. Red knew the ridicule her friend was struggling with, had more to do with the fact that as a profiler, she did not pick up any signs. The doctor walked over to her. 

"She is adapted at hiding. She takes precautions. I would venture, assuming, unless Swan wanted you to know, you would never find out her secrets." A nod from Will confirmed the doctor's words. Red returned her attention to the man. "You are implying that I will find something worse?" He shrugged. 

"I cannot tell. I do know she has broken her ribs before, other than that I have no idea what you might discover." The women heard the distress in his voice. 

"Would you like a report?" It was an unconventional disregard for the law, something Regina would never expect from the Medical Examiner. Will thought about the offer, as well as the implications.

"No. I am already breaking her trust. Something that was not given easily. Just keep it to yourself?" Red gave him a shadow of a smile. 

"This will be a burden?" He swallowed hard before he answered.

"I suspect for you it will be different. I wish I knew who was responsible so that I could kill them." He looked towards the detective. "I would torture them for months. Watching as their will to live slowly slip away, then, to just inflict more misery, I will give them to Neal."

The shock was evident on Regina's face. The man meant every word. It told her several things, whatever happened in Swan's past was horrific enough to evoke such angered measures. The mild-mannered Officer Cassidy would be more feared than the man before her, a concept she found hard to relegate. And lastly, that Will Scarlet most certainly made for a better friend than an enemy. She would hate to cross him. The unfortunate truth about their lives was that one day she might have to.

They worked together to scan and reposition Swan. Red did her hands first. Then she x-rayed her ribs on both sides at two angles. The circumstances were not ideal, but Will kept on encouraging her. It was clear that he was worried. Regina questioned him between adjusting the unconscious woman. He knew Swan for almost nine years and had limited knowledge of her past and the abuse. Even though he indicated that he did not want to see the results, it was a necessity for him that _someone_ knew. Red took a chest x-ray, then moved the machine to her shoulder and upper arm. Her eyes fell on the results, but she would study them later. Swan was already stirring to her utter amazement.

"Does she have any injuries on her legs?" Will frowned at the question. He tried to think. Then he scratched his head. "She mostly covers up." The ME finished.

"How much does she sleep?" Red asked suddenly. Will gave her a sad smile, knowing his friend would never tell her the truth. 

"Not much." The doctor nodded. Even now, in a drugged state, Swan’s mind seemed guarded. Warning her that her body was being violated, urging her to wake up. She shook the grogginess from her as if it was not there. Her body hit out towards Will. Estimating him as a threat. Regina shook her head. The reaction was unbelievable.

 _How many fights have you had? How many did you lose?_ She nearly choked on the emotion as she assisted Will to move the half conscience girl back to the examination bed.

Red hid the x-ray machine as Regina straightened Swan's clothes. When she turned, she saw Will had a mask of indifference on his face. She knew it would be a tool she needed to utilise as well. She moved to Red, for assurance and to compose herself as Will helped his friend through the grogginess. Explaining in whispers that she fainted. That she needed rest. 

Regina shook her head and walked away. _I should have seen it!_ She thought back to Swan's reaction in the showers at the station. Her underlying anger. Esméralda's comment. Regina wanted to cry, she has seen the repercussions of child abuse before. This was different. Swan was a decorated Marine, carrying war scars with pride, shrinking away at people that might come too close. Shielding herself from the world when it came to her past. The contradiction was massive. 

The arrogant cop and this broken child she displayed today. She breathed deeply. Pushing the overwhelming emotions aside. When she turned back, Will's full gaze was on her. The detective did not even try to hide her sorrow. She asked the question that plagued her the day before. 

“Was Swan in a cult?” She saw the terror on the man’s face, then he shook his head, he did not know. He told the Detective if anyone knew, it would be Neal. The patient started to stir. Red finished up, steeling herself emotionally for Swan to wake.

Between Will's firm moves and Doctor Lucas's tentative soft queries, Swan was patched up. The ice packs wrapped in place to ease the swelling. She was dressed within a few minutes. Will even brought her a clean vest and a uniform shirt. Ruby prescribed anti-inflammatory and pain tablets. From what Regina told her, the kid was most likely not going to take them, but it was there if she needed it. She watched Swan as she pulled the ironed long-sleeve vest on. She wore it to cover her arms, Ruby realised. Not only the suicide, all the other little marks she would not care to explain to anyone.

Swan was regulating her breathing as Will had a private conversation with the doctor. Swan saw her nod a few times, wipe a tear. Regina stood quietly while everything happened. Swan could see the questions in Regina's eyes. There was nothing she could say, nothing to explain. Her body told its own story. Whispers of her bravery in battles. Quiet confessions of her struggles with life and the deep-seated silence of abuse. She had no illusion regarding her scars. Between the questions, Swan saw a determination in the doctor's gaze. She gave the woman a grateful smile.

"Everyone has a story." Swan touched the red scar that ran from her hip to just below her rib cage. It was her favoured story, the injury she was proud of. "I just do not want to tell the story." She touched the wounds covered by the dragon. Regina swallowed her tears as she watched, realising Swan needed understanding, not sympathy or judgement. She understood the young woman's reactions of earlier and comprehended her reluctance to share. Red also recognised the need of the officer to protect herself from well-intended people, who might ask too many questions. Reluctantly, she realised now why Swan had such a high pain threshold.

"I will be your GP." Regina heard Red announce. "I will also do your yearly physicals, _but_ …" She emphasised the word. "You need to try and trust me? I will need the truth from you if you injure yourself again?" Regina watched Swan intensely, she could see the struggle the officer had. She nodded towards Red.

"Good, Will explained that you do not like pain killers. If it becomes too much, take whatever makes you comfortable and tell Detective Mills you need a break. If you do not speak up Officer, she will work you to death." She gave her friend a pointed look. "She is booked off for two days, but someone needs to stay with her. I will update her file and the incident report."

Will looked at his friend for answers. She shrugged. "Neal is on duty."

"And James?" Regina picked up the slight disdain in his voice.

"Starts his four-day-eight at twelve." Will looked at Regina in question. 

"She needs to rest. Knowing her, she won’t." He explained as he started to clean up the bloodied mess around them. The detective looked from Will to the officer, then her eyes remained on Swan. Then she slumped against Will's shoulder. He held her. Held her with love. It was the most vulnerable Regina has yet seen the kid. She clung to Will. In that moment, not strong enough. Letting the large man be her strength.

"It is settled then," Will confirmed. Swan hopped off the table. Regina heard the name Fat Gregg and Swan protested against the information Will gave her. 

"I need a drink," Regina concluded. Utterly exhausted suddenly. He obviously thought about something, because he snickered.

"One day we will all get royally pissed. Then you will hear the Humvee story. As much as Swan's friends can brag and exaggerate their miss-adventures, I assure you, that story cannot be exaggerated."

Fat Gregg was as skinny as a rake. He picked Swan up as if she weighed nothing. Will indicated that he was ready to leave. The detective had a quiet conversation with her friend. 

"Call me?" It was more of an instruction than a question. The doctor knew she would. If the X-ray was as bad as the visual examination, she knew she would need a friend tonight

Will asked Red to call him as soon as she was finished. He wrote his private number down for her. Regina wondered how many people in the BPD were after that number. Here he was, giving it to a stranger without care. Sure, he knew precisely who they were. He addressed them on their titles from the moment he walked in. Regina wondered whether, after working with the officer for a few days, if he had a file on her. It amused her as much as it frightened her. She walked out with the man she was ready to shoot in self-defence a few minutes before. He held the door open for her. She had to admit if she did not know what the Scarlet's in Boston was, she would have liked him instantly.

Regina was ready to leave and headed for her car, Will followed her. She looked towards the sky in a frustrated, disillusioned manner. When she faced him once more, tears slightly brimming in her eyes, he sighed deeply. 

"Ask your question, Detective." Then he quantified the statement. "One question. Just one. Choose wisely. I will answer only one question. But, whatever you ask, I will tell you the absolute truth." She knew from the seriousness in his expression that she would get the truth from him. Her mind raced. There were more than a few cold cases tied to his family. Even before she asked, Regina, knew, her request was made with her heart, not her head.

"Does Swan work for you?"

"No." She closed her eyes. It was not relief, it was not what she wanted to know, and she was too scared to have that question answered. She looked up when she felt Will's hand on her arm.

"Have you read her file?" She shook her head. She did not get through all of it. "Truthfully, there is not much in there. And the little there is obscured by other people's opinions, not facts. Swan…" He stood back, trying to find the correct words. "She does not open up to people, but you will find she is very easy to talk to. There is no judgement when it comes to her. Except, of course, when it comes to the abusers of women and children." Regina half-smiled, recalling her partner's anger towards their murder victim a few weeks before. _Was it only weeks?_ It felt like months. 

"I told her. One night in the Rigestan Desert." His voice was soft as he related an exceptionally personal tale to the detective. He carried on, explaining that another soldier he knew believed you can tell your secrets to the Desert. That the Desert will swallow all your sins. Of how Swan saved his life in that fucking god-forsaken Desert. Afterwards, he felt he owed her an explanation. The truth about the kind of man she saved. She listened. Not once did she gasp or asked a question while he was relating his life story to the PFC.

"I tried hard not to cry that night, a confession such as that happens once. Telling another Soul all your pain, all the pain you inflicted. Bearing your deepest darkest secrets. I never could tell if she liked me. She has issues with authority. I outrank her." His voice caught lightly. "Here I was, telling this kid who I really was." He looked sombrely at Regina. "I was supposed to protect her, lead her. She needed to trust me, my decisions, and here I was telling her about my father and the Irish mob and what we did." He wiped a tear from the side of his eye, even before Regina realised how hard the recollection was for him. 

"Do you know what that broken, fucked-up girl, caught in a fucked-up war said to me?" The Detective knew it was a rhetorical question.

"Sounds like my kind of family." The huge, dangerous man stood before a Boston Detective with tears in his eyes. 

"No, judgement or intolerance. Only acceptance. She gave me an extremely rare give Detective. Something no one other than my mother had given me before. Unconditional love. For her, it did not matter who I was. She did not follow me out of fear or loyalty or because she got paid. Swan is my friend because she loves me. I will live or die, as required, to try to come close to that kind of commitment to her." His voice was hoarse with emotion at his final admission. "That is all." He shook his head. 

"You want to know what the connection is between a young Boston cop, the partner of an esteemed Detective, with the son of Boston's most notorious Irish organised crime family?" Regina reluctantly indicated that it was precisely the information she required. 

"There is none. But she has a kid-sister like fondness for this sweet Irish computer geek who runs a bar in Southie." Regina understood. She said nothing. 

He walked towards his own car, then commented over his shoulder, "Keep in mind Detective, I will do anything to keep her protected, even if it means war with Boston's finest." After the lengthy explanation, she had no doubt in her mind that it would be his exact action he would take if ever it came to that.

***


	8. Politicians

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do apologise for the long gap. I promise updates will be far more frequent from now on

The area surrounding the station was laced in chaos. Protesters were razing their banners. The media was all over the place. It felt as if every one in Boston had an opinion over the events of the morning. A large number of woman and black people were chanting, _Children's rights were human rights_. For people so used to police brutality, it was refreshing to find a cop that cared enough to ensure no injury to a child.

The Mercedes moved through the crowd, cordoned off by every beat cop available, the majority of the masses started to cheer. _Yells of super-cop, hero_ and _awesome_ could be heard, even over the powerful engine of the car. The officers had a harder time controlling the excitement.

The media cameras were flashing, reporters were hanging over the police barrier, screaming questions at the slow-moving car. Regina could see Neal and James in the police line, keeping the protestors at bay. James looked frantic. Neal watched her. She indicated a positive gesture with her head. The officer seemed to understand. Relief flooded his features. Regina looked towards James once more. He did not have the look in his eyes Neal had. It puzzled her for a moment, then she dismissed it. She had more important things to be concerned with, other than the numerous men in Swan's life.

***

Sean and Prince updated her on the chaos outside. Then she went to her desk to review the information she had on the Green murder. She asked Jasmin for everything she could get on SOC and the Noxon Siege. She spent the remainder of the day scanning through photographs and articles about the Cult. Her mind could not conceive the footage she viewed the day before and the information she read, with what she witnessed regarding Swan.

***

In the late afternoon, Regina dialled Red.

"Hey?" It has been hours since she left the ME with her painful task.

"Hheeyy!" Red jubilantly stretched the word. Regina held her forehead as if to ward off not only her worries but a headache.

"Did you take any recreational medicine?" Red giggled, adding to the Detective's suspicion.

"Nooo. I am just really drunk." Regina heard a scuffle. 

"Hey?" Another voice asked.

"Cassidy?" Regina questioned, half relieved.

"Yeah, Detective. Doc is with me. She was pretty worked up when she called Will. She had a few drinks."

Regina closed her eyes. She knew her friend was not immune to death and suffering. On the contrary, she had enormous respect and understanding for her victims. As a person, Red was liked, outgoing and a little extravagant, as the M.E, she displayed only professionalism. She never lost her shit, no matter how awful the circumstances surrounding the case.

"Cassidy, is she alright?" Regina's voice was soft and caring. Neal on his side looked at the cell in his hand, to make sure it was the Detective he was speaking to.

"Yeah, yeah, Detective. She is blowing off steam. Telling me about some of her crap cases." Then he added. "She will be fine here, with me, Detective." She thanked the Officer. Then made her way to the Captain's office.

***

Edmund Dante, the DA, looked crisp and full of eagerness when Regina entered the office. Spencer questioned her about Swan's condition. She gave him a vague report. The Captain knew by then that his Officer was never admitted to a hospital. The look he gave Regina indicated that they would continue the conversation at a later stage.

"Please tell me that it is true?" Edmund questioned enthusiastically clapping his hands together in front of his chest. Regina raised a dark eyebrow in response. It took all the wind out of Edmund's plea.

"That the BPD caught a criminal on the FBI’s most-wanted list?"

Regina rolled her eyes as she slumped down in a chair. Passing her case docket to her Captain. He _got the look_. The one Detective Mills reserved for incompetence. The evil-eyed look that went with her reputation. As the story was elaborately told to rookies. She would stare you down. Stall your blood and turn the breath in your longs to ice. Even if you tried to look away, her nostrils would flare, her brows would shoot up, making any grown man piss in his pants. Just before she would hand you your ass back, she would rip your balls off. The _Evil Queen’s death glare_. The ominous nickname changed over time. Few cops knew the origin story. However, they all agreed that the name suited Detective Mills.

"I did not divulge that information Detective," Spencer responded in his defence. The glare turned to Edmund. She hated it when half-cocked information was released.

"Come on, Regina, you know people talk. As I heard it, one of your detectives lost his shit and told you he was wanted by the FBI." Regina knew Edmund Dantes long before he ever thought about becoming the DA. It often astounded her how people changed once in a position of power. Spencer was the exception, rather than the rule.

She pressed her lips together. Edmund knew it indicated that she was calming herself, thinking before she spoke. She stood up. It was only then he noticed she had a pant-suit on instead of a skirt. She took the same feminine, but intolerant stance she did when she had on a skirt. The difference at that moment was that, rather than sexy, she looked as if she readied herself to kick him in the balls. He unintentionally took a step back.

"Explain?" She demanded, the DA did not squander a moment. It amused Spencer endlessly.

"The suspect in the Reverend murder, I was told he was wanted." He instantly realised he was misinformed. Regina had a look that told him, he was a complete moron. She turned her back on him. Then proceeded to inform her Captain with her primary findings.

"I need to speak to a few more people. I have a skype call with a US Marshall from WitSec. Next week I will go to Souza to interview a criminal with a similar MO."

Spencer further questioned her on her trip to Washington, DC.

"I will need to speak to Swan. She has a better understanding and knowledge of cults." Spencer questioned her silently. She wanted to discuss her suspicions with the Captain, but she had no intentions on doing it in front of the DA.

“How is she doing?” Regina looked tired, as she explained the Officer’s injuries. Then Spencer asked what he wanted to know all along.

“Do you think you can work with her?”

His question surprised her. She never stopped to think about it. In her mind, she partnered them due to Swan’s assistance with the case. She might be able to work with the Officer, despite her lack of experience. She was smart, tentative, inquisitive. More importantly, she did not get in the Detective’s way or hindered her during the investigation.

“Perhaps.” She answered Spencer eventually in a non-committed way.

"Will Mr Green be requesting a State trial?" Spencer saw the irritation back on Regina's face at the DA's question. He looked down to conceal his mirth. Regina knew anyone would rather be prosecuted by the local courts than federal courts. The DA should have realised that the FBI would have jurisdiction in such a matter. 

"I suppose." She shrugged, knowing the DA lost her. He questioned the Detective, she finally revealed the misconception.

“Reverend Simon Green is the deceased.”

"The FBI’s wanted man is the victim?" He asked, astonished.

"The Mayor is not going to like that." It was the last bit of needless information she required to lose her temper. Spencer was up before she got the chance to tell Edmund what to do about his political dilemma. She was surprised that her mother had not yet called.

"George?" He smiled bemusedly. 

"When will the full report be available?" He asked.

"A week, more… I need to interview a few people." He dismissed her with a nod. She could hear Dante explaining the situation to the Mayor. It was an election year. She knew the incident would be used by every political candidate to exploit in whatever way they see fit to adapt to their campaign.

***

Regina was bone tired. It had been a long emotional day. She went through her contact list to make a call when she saw Neal Cassidy. She needed to speak to her mother. She disconnected the call and walked towards Cassidy. He was in jeans and a T-shirt.

"How is Swan?"

"She is sleeping." She heard the concern in his voice that she did not contemplate. Neal indicated to the Detective that she should come with him. She questioned it.

"The Captain..." He stated. Then she recollected. She needed to speak to Swan about Simon Green and now to Neal about Swan’s possible involvement in a cult. She slipped her thumb through her palm. All she wanted was a shower and some wine. Her sense of duty prevailed. She accepted Cassidy's invitation.


	9. A Family of blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Regina meets Emma's "family"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The theories and philosophies discussed in this chapter could be upsetting for some people. Please keep in mind that it is two profilers discussing the possibilities regarding the state of mind of the killer and what drove him to the point of murder. It is not meant to offend any group with an opposite opinion.   
> The bad guy is crazy.

Neal told her outside the Station that she should follow him. She questioned him. He shrugged, stating that they were going to his place. After a short drive, he pulled his truck into a space on the sidewalk of a neat little condo. 

At first glance, Regina knew there was no way an officer of Neal's stature could afford this place. Two other cars were parked in the driveway. Neal smiled at her through his nervousness towards her. She was, after all, not only his superior but the _Evil Queen_. His manners were impeccable; he helped her out of the car and escorted her to the front door, holding it open.

Inside she was flooded with the noise of rock music, chatter and the smell of food. His stomach grumbled at the aroma. He smiled apologetically at her. He showed her to the kitchen.

"Detective, this is Fletcher." He introduced her to the one man she did not know.

"Oh, dear god, please tell me she is straight?" She was taken aback by his forwardness. Neal and Will replied in unison that she was not. Fletcher looked at her crushed.

"Fucking Psycho Bitch gets all the dazzling women." He stood up. Regina noticed the hi-tech artificial leg. He stretched out a big hand. "Gibson Fletcher. It is a sheer pleasure to be in your presence." She smiled at his flamboyant mannerisms. He seemed charming.

"Regina Mills." She answered.

"Fuck me, Swan is a lucky girl." At the comment Regina and Neal blushed, Will Scarlet gave him a slap at the back of his head.

"Fucking retarded moron." His soft hazel eyes met with Regina's darker once. "Please excuse the Lance Corporal. He has no comprehension of platonic relationships." Fletcher immediately defended himself.

"If Swan is platonic with this goddess, then she lost more of her shit than what we thought." The comment was meant to be light, but he instantly felt a tension in the air. "I'm missing something, aren't I?" Neal recovered first.

"Detective Mills is Swan's C.O." Fletcher's eyes widen.

"Good god. And how is that working out for our notorious slut?" 

This time Neal slapped him. Then the men settled into playful banter. Fletcher complaining about their abuse on a disabled body person, while Neal mocked him about being jealous of Swan. Taunting him that he could borrow one of her dildo's if he couldn’t get it up any longer. Regina watched the display amused. Will came to stand next to her, a dishtowel over his shoulder.

"Please excuse them, Detective. They are starved for the attention of a real woman." She blushed at his comment. Will steered her casually to the lounge area. The other men leaving them be.

"Wine or whiskey?" He asked her as he stood in front of the small bar.

"Is the whiskey any good?" Regina questioned, wondering what on earth she was doing there. Will fainted shock.

"It is from my personal stock." It evoked a small smile from Regina. Irish whiskey. It would be a treat.

"Whiskey thanks."

He poured two glasses. Then indicated for her to sit in the cosy lounge. They drank in silence. Regina savoured her drink. She could feel the tension of the day seeping from her body. The music and loud chatter from the kitchen, reminding her how empty her own house would be this time of the night. She closed her eyes for a moment. _God, I'm tired_. She heard Will get up when she opened her eyes, Neal was at her side. He gave her a shy smile.

"Sorry about earlier. We are so used to Swan. We often forget other women are not exposed to our antics as she is."

"It is alright Officer." 

She was about to speak when Neal interrupted and took charge. Telling her to come with him. She followed him as he related some of the events of the day to her. He stopped at the door on the other side of the house. He softly opened it. Poking his head inside before he opened it completely. It was Swan's room. A soft light falling over her bed, making the occupants visible to Regina. Neal motioned her in. A quick glance told him that Swan and the Doc, where still fast asleep.

"Doctor Kelvin had a bit too much to drink." He explained her presence in Swan's bed. Regina smiled at the woman who was cuddling Swan in her sleep. _She had cried_.

"Did she tell you anything?" Neal moved uncomfortably. He avoided eye-contact with the Detective. At that moment he looked so young.

"Cassidy?" The man shrugged. Then moved away from the bed. He was not going to divulge anything to the Detective. He switched a light on in the adjacent room. Swan had an en suite bathroom.

"Will said the food would take a while. There are fresh towels and some comfortable clothes for you." Regina frowned. Apparently, she was staying for supper. She thanked the man who disappeared quietly.

***

She felt better after a shower. Neal neatly set out everything for her, the toothbrush still wrapped. Worn jeans that smelled of softener. An oversized sweater, socks and underwear. She frowned at his selection. There was no way she would wear Swan's underwear. The thought was considerate, however. She wondered how Swan managed to train these rugged men to be so sensitive. It made her feel her loneliness more. Not a matter she would show or admit to anyone.

Regina thought she should feel silly and uncomfortable in her borrowed clothes. She felt safe and warm, she concluded as she ran her hand over the jeans. She strolled out of the bathroom to the bed. The soft light revealed enough of her surroundings to take a look at the room. She did not know what to make of it. It looked more like a young boy’s room than a grown woman. The duvet was of two action heroes. So was the poster in the bathroom.

There were several bookcases. It was full, leaving the owner to stack the rest of her collection on the floor. The subjects ranged from Metaphysics to Communism. Fiction, non-fiction, history and academic. Regina was taken aback. She thought the kid joked when she said she reads a lot. Other than the books and a workbench, where Swan was sharpening some knives, there were no personal items. Aside from for a few photographs, all haphazardly posted on the wall, except one. There was a framed Marine-box. The Marine's uniform, his tag, a photo and a folded flag, all neatly displayed. She reached out when she heard a muffled.

"Don’t touch that!" Startled, the Detective turned to see Swan half awake. Her legs were pulled up, her arm over her face, still tangled with Red around her.

"Sorry, I did not mean to wake you." Swan waved her off.

"What the fuck happened? I feel like I got kicked by a Markhor." Regina had no idea what that meant. Swan moved to see who was cuddling with her. Her head slammed back on the pillow.

"Shit, almost thought I got lucky." She pulled herself slowly from Red's embrace, then tugged a strand of dark hair away from the doctor's face. "She's beautiful." She commented softly.

"And straight," Regina responded, feeling more protective over her friend than the officer at that moment. Swan gave a soft laugh.

"Yeah. But still beautiful." Their eyes met in the dim light. It made Regina self-conscious.

Swan got out of the bed and stretched. The Detective could hear some vertebras click and an audible pop as Swan's shoulder adjusted itself.

"Have the boys been treating you like a lady? If not, I would have to kick their asses."

Regina reassured her that the men were very nice to her. Swan nodded, then indicated for Regina to follow her. In the light of the hallway, the Detective saw that the woman had sweatpants on and a clean vest. By looking at her, nothing suggested that she was injured. There was no discomfort in her body language. Her movements were fluent, relaxed. She was barefoot. Regina took in all of the women.

"It's rude to stare." Swan abolished her as she took a visual examination of the Officer's state. The tanned, toned, bare muscles did not go unnoticed either.

"Sorry," Regina mumbled as she was caught.

The men in the kitchen erupted as Swan entered.

"Fucking bunch of depraved savages." She commented as her first act was to open the fridge. Downing half a bottle of water. 

"Gonna shower." She announced, looking at Will. "Behave yourselves." She pointed towards Fletcher in particular as she strolled off.

"Chow in ten," Will called after her. He knew she would be back in time.

***

When Swan returned, Regina caught her breath. She was dressed in tight black jeans with a sleeveless white vest, showing off her attributes. Her swagger was different. Less arrogance, more self-assurance as she moved in her safe environment. She casually kissed Will on his rough cheek. 

"Smells good." He hit her on the ass with the dishtowel as she tried to steal a mushroom.

"What can I get you to drink Detective?"

Regina held up a glass of whiskey. Swan nodded then got herself a glass of milk. The grouped settled noisily around a table in the open lounge area. Regina was taken aback, not only by the noise but by their co-ordinated manners. Everyone seemed to know what their task was. The table was set, food placed out and ready in a moment. The men waited for her to sit before they took their places. Will at the head of the table. She was placed next to Swan, who took her hand. She felt out of place like she was an intruder in a sacred ritual. The table went quiet in an instant, making Regina even more nervous. Fletcher’s deep African voice filled the room.

"We give thanks for the plentiful bounty. And for the animal Spirit, the forest provided for our strength." Fletcher made a cross over his chest as the unusual prayer ended.

Swan smiled as the men sat quietly. She got up, grabbed a bread roll and handed a plate to Regina. The Detective took it, then stood to dish a moderate meal for herself. The moment she sat down, all chaos broke out. The men grabbed food while carrying on with their conversation. Regina froze with a fork of the pasta Will made halfway to her mouth. Swan snickered. She leaned over to whisper to Regina.

"You get used to it after about the tenth meal. They are big boys. They need their food. Go on." She encouraged Regina to take a bite.

The food was terrific. She did not realise how hungry she was until she asked for seconds. Will gave her a warm smile. She tried to follow the conversation. The men were talking about sport, throwing insults at each other and the players they supported. Regina had no idea about any of the subjects. She ventured an opinion.

"Are we going to speak about what happened today?" All the men rushed to fill their mouths with food. Swan sat back in her chair. Regina noticed that she did not eat much.

"Detective, we do not talk shop at the table." The statement was final. She threw Neal with a piece of bread to get his attention.

"Pass the salad Asshole?" Neal did, the conversation continuing as before. Regina observed Swan silently communicating with Will. He nodded his consent, at which Swan got up and dished up two more plates. She headed to the kitchen with the full meals. She came back with a beer for herself. It was the signal for the rest of them.

Neal and Fletcher started to clear the table. In the kitchen, Will rinsed the plates as Swan packed them into the dishwasher. He got them all a fresh drink as Regina watched the spectacle. They moved like a well-oiled machine. There were no instructions passed, no yelling or arguing, all the while the conversation on players and teams continued. Swan checked in on Red. She was still fast asleep.

***

They settled in the lounge. Swan could see that the Detective was eager to get down to business. She knew there was a matter that was not being discussed. She felt it, the moment she got up. Her friend's eyes followed her, but no one spoke.

She drank her beer slowly. Observing. The tension in Regina's body, Will's discomfort with the new addition. She was waiting for Fletcher. He did not disappoint.

"What is the Markhor in the room that I am so unaware off?" Neal rolled his eyes at the man's lack of tact. Swan smiled into her beer. Regina was ready.

"I have a few questions for Swan." She noticed they all waited. Will nodded then told Swan they would remain in the lounge. She got herself another beer and a drink for Regina before she showed Regina to the deck adjacent to the garden. Swan stretched her long legs out onto the table as she balanced, her chair back. Regina first took out Swan’s file. She left it unopened on the table.

“Just ask,” Swan prompted. “The worse that can happen is for me to tell you to go fuck yourself.” 

Regina shook her head. She started slowly, telling Swan everything she had uncovered during the investigation thus far. She gave Swan her profile. The Officer read it through. She did not have to check the other notes. Swan knew every detail on the Bruce Larker murders. She knew she also had information that the Detective would never find out. Her mind was playing with the idea to withhold the information.

“Your suspect is the same age as Larker. You need to change your profile, thirty to thirty-five. He would be mobile. No physical address.” She did not explain her conclusions.

“Also, Mrs Green knows much more than what she led to believe.” Regina studied Swan. She told the Officer that Mrs Green was a child during the height of SOC and thus also a victim of Green. The information sadden Swan.

“Were you there?” The green eyes met her serious dark gaze. Swan changed the subject.

“Did you read my file?” Regina eventually got the time to do that. “And?” Swan questioned. Regina let out a sigh. 

“Emma Swan did not exist before the age of sixteen.” It was by far the most obvious fact in Swan’s file. The woman nodded her head.

“There is a perfectly reasonable explanation for that, and I would like to keep it that way.” It did not answer any of Regina’s questions. She tried another approach.

“Steven Allard and Bruce Larker are brothers.” Swan did not react. “Steven asked about a girl, Sarah.” At this, Swan smiled.

“That’s a name I have not heard in a long time.” Then she laughed. “If Sarah did this, you would have never found the body and the torture would have lasted for days.” Regina narrowed her eyes. 

“You know her?” Swan nodded her head. It explained to Regina the Officer’s involvement, other than being there, the detailed knowledge of the cult and the two men. The younger woman turned grave.

“Detective, I do not care to speak about my past. The little I can remember is all painful memories.” She touched her side, where the scar tissue of the repeated stabbing was between her ribs. 

“I am not the only one. Do not ask me where Sarah is.” She was careful to not reveal more information than what the Detective had. Regina shook her head. The day had been emotional. She was starting to feel the weight of it in her body.

“Is there anything else you can tell me?” Swan thought about it.

“If David King is in Boston, there might be others. He could be the first in a line of a long trail of bodies.” _Great, that is all I need_ , Regina thought.

Swan continued with caution.

“The murder weapon would be a custom hunting knife. The staking and beheading would be symbolic more than anything. A manner in which one would kill a daemon. The mutilation was the only personal action.”

Regina questioned her analysis, telling her what Steven Allard said. Swan shook her head.

“That was how the Cunnings were killed. Larker stabbed them through the hearts. An upward thrust.” She motioned the action. “Then hanged them upside down and slid their throats. A bloodletting, like you, would do with a deer. Your guy has a more religious approach.” She considered her next lot of information. 

“There is no clear direction of how one is supposed to kill a daemon. There are mythologies, _The Malleus Maleficarum_ , _Daemonologie_ by King James, guidelines on exorcisms from the Catholic Church, mention of the Apkallu and Nephilim. But nowhere will you find a clear direction of how to kill a daemon, except for literature.” 

Regina questioned the validity of the statement. Swan continued to explain that as far as the Bible was concerned, there were few mentions of daemons. The Dead Sea Scrolls and The Apocrypha books held more information. That between Dante Alighieri’s _Inferno_ and John Milton’s epic _Paradise Lost_ , they created the Fallen-Angel-myth, the war in Heaven and daemons, fuelled by the Pagan believes of mystical creatures with unnatural powers.

Then enters Lord Byron and his scholars, Mary Shelley produced _Frankenstein_ , John Polidori’s _The Vampyre_ , Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu wrote _Carmilla_ the tale which preceded Bram Stoker’s Dracula by nearly three decades. All works of fiction, which, in combination with overzealous religions, created something to fear.

“What does this have to do with the murder?” Swan smirked at the question.

“Fear is what drives people to go to church. Fear is what makes people conform. It is how you control them.” She sighed deeply and considered her next thought as she placed her arms protectively around herself.

“Few people question the origin of things. The fact remains that through the ages, innocent people have suffered at the hand of a church. The Crusades, the Inquisition, the Witch-hunts, the satanic panic of the seventies… It is all mass propaganda to control. Misconceived ideas sold as truth.”

She elaborated on the fear factor within religion and therefore, a cult. The creation of fear toward that which could harm the Soul, the Spirit and the Body. That a cult function on all three. To entrap a person into religion, you create a fear towards the destruction of their immortal Soul, then telling them that their way was the only way to safe your Soul, while terrifying the mind and suffocating individualism, you break their Spirits. Amid governing the body, the weakest part of a human by tiring them and subjecting them to punishment. Convincing the ever-dwindling mind that suffering of the body will heal the Soul. Working up to the final betrayal towards a person, you thank them and their god for it.

She continued her rant explaining that Hitler, in a sense, rebuilt his nation and the bodies of his followers which made him more tolerable than some fanatic cults over the ages.

It was hard to swallow. Portraying Hitler as more caring towards his followers than SOC or any other extremist group. Regina, however, saw past that. Swan was giving her a glimpse into the mind and rationalisation of her suspect.

“When you remove the cult, the fear and doctrine remain. Nature abhors a vacuum according to Aristotle; you need to fill the void.”

“Punish atrocities’ and killing daemons?” Swan smiled at the Detective. Not many people understood her reasoning. Most disagreed with it, but that was not the point. She was not trying to recruit Regina to the _Dark Side_ , she was giving her a view of an irrational mind. The fact that the Detective continued to listen without interruption and her understanding of the reasoning told Swan how intelligent the woman was.

“You will continue to believe in daemons, but what if, for instance; a therapist helps you to understand that these people, these teachers you looked up to, were the guilty, the evil, the monsters?” Regina nodded her understanding. 

“You would continue to live by your convictions and safe the world from daemons, only now, he was killing people and not pretend monsters. Instead of blaming homosexuality, abortions and people of a different race, this killer changed his fanaticism towards people who harmed the Soul. _Death by character assassination_. An eye for an eye, the Soul for the Body.”

“He would believe his own concocted bullshit. Justifying, _thou shall not kill_ , by demonizing them. They are guilty, and they need to pay. In the lack of clear guidance and direction, he reverts to what is known or normal.”

Regina smiled. “Decapitation and staking them through the heart.” 

Swan rewarded her with an open hand gesture. The Detective continued to think. Swan’s insight was astonishing. Her mind tied the most strange theories together. She remembered Steven Allard, also referred to Hitler, she questioned this relation Swan so easily weaved into the conversation.

“He’s the poster boy for white nationalism. Any right-wing cult would teach a margin of his philosophy. After the destruction of the Body and Mind, you need to reconstruct it. Create it in your own image.” Regina nodded her head in understanding. It spoke volumes about the megalomania, ego-centric personas of cult leaders.

“If you are going to replace something, replace it with something of value.” Regina turned her head in thought.

“When we take away from a man his traditional way of life, his customs, his religion, we had better make certain to replace it with, something of value. Robert Ruark,” It was a curious book for Swan to quote.

“Exactly! This is where the mind-control and mass manipulation come from. Hitler with _Mein Kampf_ or the _Deutsches Jungvolk in der Hitler Jugend_. Bootcamp, initiation.” She continued with an example, motioning with her hands the two-part emphasis on her next words.

“Re-enforce the mind, while you Re-construct the Body with exercise, healthy food without the copper sulphate in it.” Regina shook her head at the latter comment, the believe that CuSO4 could make men impotent. Thus, controlling sexual need.

This perspective, in conjunction with the thought of filling the void with a constructive ideology, created the perfect breeding ground for a cult. Regina thought about her profile.

“Do you know of any active members?” Swan shook her head.

“And before you ask, I do not know any former members either.” 

Regina did not believe her. She could not put her finger on it, but she was convinced that the Officer was withholding information. She did not know if it was because of the child abuse that she thought Swan was part of the cult or if it was the vast flood of information, she supplied on the subject matter.

“Who is chasing you, Swan?” The question came from nowhere. The woman did not answer right away.

“Do you know that the Grimm Brother fairy tales are closer to horror and thriller films than their Disney counterparts?” 

She did. The truth of the Grimm Brothers was that they all ended horrifically. The Little Mermaid commits suicide after her Prince falls in love with another. Prince Charming’s wedding gift to Snow White was placing the Evil Queen in metal shoes that were heated to a red hot fire. They left it on the Queen’s feet, in an attempt to escape the heat, she _danced_ until she dropped dead of exhaustion.

“What is your point?” Swan looked at her with a seriousness the detective has not witnessed before.

“Does it matter from who or what you are running when you know that the monsters are real?” Regina looked at the younger woman for a long time. She wanted to tell Swan that she could help her, protect her. That she would be there for her. She didn’t, not only could the Detective not promise those things, but she was confident that Swan would never trust her words or sincerity to be genuine.

***

Red was a reprieve when she came out, looking better. Swan got up to show her where the kitchen was and warmed her food. The Doctor questioned the young officer about her injury while she ate. Her keen eyes also looked Swan over. Her right upper arm had a few old scars that could have been caused by anything. She wore a bandana around her right wrist. Red guessed to hide the suicide. Wondering if her friends knew of the near-fatal attempt. After her meal, the Doctor told her to sit. 

She wanted to have a look at the lacerations. The skin around the plaster was an eerie purple. Swan gave her the first aid box. It was packed. Red thought it to be more of a paramedic case than a mere first aid box. She wondered if the inhabitants used it for other purposes, given Will's alternate occupation. Red was taken aback once more at the level of Swan's pain threshold. She expertly checked the wound for infection or any other indications that it was more than lacerations. The bruising caused her enough concern to call Will. Regina followed him.

"I think I should immobilise her arm for a few days." He checked the movement in Swan's arm. The muscles were tight. He wrapped his big hand around her shoulder and pulled the limb straight. Swan flinched slightly.

"Tell me about the gunshot wound?" She looked at the x-rays, it was what caused her to drink too much. There was a lot of scarring around the wound. It was clear that the tendons and muscles were surgically treated. The deltoid muscle healed to an extent, and there were clear indications of fractures on her scapula.

"She was lucky she did not lose her arm," Will answered in a dead tone. 

It was a night he never wanted to live through again. Swan saved his life. The bullet was meant to kill him. The girl took the hit as she pushed him out of the way. Their entire squad would have died that night, was it not for the actions of the Private First Class. Swan has phenomenal hearing. A noise alerted her of the danger long before he had time to react.

"We were ambushed. Swan was shot with an assault rifle."

Red read the medical report, earlier that day. She knew Swan was airlifted and treated at a UN hospital. It was clear to the doctor, that whatever happened that night and the injury it incurred was not going to be discussed further. These men had a strange protectiveness when it came to Swan. More so, they closed ranks whenever there was a perceived threat. Red was not too sure if they were helping the emotionally isolated Officer by keeping her secrets.

"I want you to see a physiotherapist?" Swan nodded. The immediate acceptance of the request worried the Doctor. For her, it was an indication that the kid was in more discomfort than what she indicated. Will came to the same conclusion.

By the time James came home from his shift, the group had settled into a relaxed mood. They shifted all the worries of the next day to the side. Drinking, sharing stories. Swan sat on the floor between Regina and Red. She was dozing off, her head leaning against the Detective's leg, whose hand was softly stroking the base of her neck where she could feel the tension under her fingers. Red noted the attentiveness. It was out of character for her friend to show so much concern in front of others.

James had a scold on his face as he watched the woman touched Swan. Will's instruction for him to eat and get some rest served as a warning to hold his opinion to himself. It was one thing to be concerned about the girl. James's behaviour was bordering on obsession. It worried the other men.

Red and Regina stayed over. They were both too intoxicated to drive. Neal offered his bedroom up for them, but both women chose to sleep in Swan's bed. Will lifted her off the floor and carried his friend to her bedroom. He took off her jeans, then pulled some men's bottom pyjamas on. Her normal sleepwear. Regina watched him. She saw the same look in all the men's eyes, except for James. They loved this woman. Perhaps more than what they all realised. Regina ventured that in the case of Neal and Will, it was more profound than the platonic adoration they projected. The women fell asleep, Red clinging to Swan, Regina on the other side of the officer.

During the night, Regina became aware of Swan holding her. She sighed and cuddled more into the embrace Swan had on her body. It felt good. It felt familiar. In the early morning, when her internal clock told her to wake up, Swan held her back.

"Stay?" The unconscious request came as the blonde-head nuzzled deeper into Regina's neck. She relented. Feeling her body mould to the younger woman's embrace.


	10. More mysteries to unravel

A deep grown made her look up from her work. She studied the still form on the action hero bed a few feet away from where she sat at Swan's desk. Her eyes looked towards the man she knew better than the day before but remained cautious of. Swan mumbled something incoherent at which Will gave a deep chuckle. Regina questioned him with a look where he was stretched out in a chair, Regina assumed Emma used for reading. He smiled softly.

"She asked which motherfucker she needed to kill first." Regina raised her eyebrows in a question. After the night before, she knew where Emma's colourful vocabulary came from. She had never heard as many phrase-intensive-cursed-conversations in her life. It made it hard to follow the conversation at times. Moreover, she could not distinguish between intended insults, anger or annoyance, from what seems to be, these men's common language use.

The Detective had many questions. After the previous night, she knew better than to ask Will. He was the leader of the group but remained a mystery to her. Regina could not determine his connection to the three officers. All she knew without a shadow of a doubt, any of the men she spoke to the night before, would gladly die to protect the sleeping woman.

Her thoughts lingered back to the past thirty-six hours. She could not recall ever being exposed to the kind of friendship she saw. Even her relationships with Red and Daniel had its boundaries. With these men, there seemed to be none. There was no limitation to their love for Swan. Their respect for Will. The length they would rise and fall for each other. A silent code, an understanding, a brotherhood she did not grasp.

Before Red left, with a horrible hangover, she took the time to change Emma's plaster. There was no indication of infection, but her arm was severely bruised. The fact that her shoulder was injured before did not help. She told Will to ensure that her arm is immobilised for a few days. She checked Swan's ribs while she was sleeping. She shook her head in thought as her fingers traced over the thick scar tissue between two ribs. Regina asked about the x-rays. She knew Red got drunk the night before because of what she learned. Now the Doctor looked at her haunted. Regina reached for her hand. Will observed that it was a measured move, something they were not used to do.

"I need to determine how old the injuries are." The Detective braised herself. "She has numerous breaks." Regina heard the tentativeness in Red's voice. "She has been through a lot. It would help if I can see her private medical file?" She posed the question to Will, who lowered his head. It was one thing to suspect more, it was another to have it confirmed.

"Swan has never had insurance. She was on the Military scheme and now with the Police Force." This caught Regina's attention.

"She was a minor. Someone had to sign off on her release from to join the Marines?" Will acknowledged to Regina that it was the standard procedure. 

He told them that her last known address was in Mattapan. He went to speak to whoever lived there. That was when he started to suspect Swan had a rough life. The former owners of the rundown house were the Smith's. The woman died of an overdose, not long after Swan went to Bootcamp. Her husband left as soon as Social Services arrived, a few weeks prior. Will told them that the situation in which they found three foster children was appalling. The kids were hungry, dirty and scared out of their minds. He spoke to the case officer himself. She informed him that one of the children was missing. _Emma Smith._

Red listened to the tale. It did not correlate with her facts. Swan might have stayed there, and be it as it may, have suffered neglect, the tally of broken bones Swan had, indicated long term abuse with minimal health care. Not the kind of thing crackheads would be able to assist with. Regina assured her that she would investigate the matter, pulling the doctor close in reassuring comfort. Will's voice was deep even as he spoke softly.

"How did she take it, letting you see the scars?" Regina flicked her thumb through her palm. She shook her head.

"It was not embarrassment. More like shame. Not shame acknowledging the abuse. It was indignity?"

Will nodded. "It makes her feel exposed. She sees it as a flaw." Brandon explained. Regina agreed with his assessment.

"It was child abuse." The Doctor stated in her anger. Will flashed her a smile. It was a sad, knowing smile. He considered elaborating, then changed his mind. Answering her with solemn words.

"Swan had never been a child." The words struck Regina directly in her gut. "Her file…" She refrained from finishing the question as Will shook his head. He rubbed his forehead, considering how to approach the subject.

"Detective, with certain _resources_ at your fingertips," He emphasised the word resources, understanding that the man referred to her mother. "You can investigate Swan's past. Like me, you will find nothing." She frowned. "Her body is a map of her past. A past that she covers up, most of which is covered up all too well." He was using the tattoos as an analogy. He moved to touch her shoulder, surprised when she did not step away. "You have her respect and more of her trust than what you are aware of Regina. Be patient."

Regina thought about their turbulent two-day partnership. There was not a single moment that convinced her the officer trusted her at any point. Will apologised for his intrusion on the women's moment of consoling each other. Women were so different. Swan buried herself into the hearts of rugged men with relative ease. She earned their protection through her commitment and courage towards them. These women, however, would protect her from now on because of Swan's vulnerability.

"A word of advice?" He had their attention instantly. "Swan is a private person. Please keep this to yourselves. Do not question her about the scars." He stopped in thought. "Actually, do not question her about anything, me, Neal…" He noticed from the look on Regina's face that she already probed. "Fuck me! What?" Regina did not see a way out under his accusing stare.

"Her name…" She could not complete the sentence.

"For the fucking safety of your life! Do not ever call her Emma." He rolled his eyes as he realised that bridge was already burned. The questions remained in the Detective's eyes.

"Google it. Em Swan, Google it. It will explain a lot to you." With those words, he was off. Red questioned the explanation. She told her friend that, EmSwan, was a town. The Doctor’s face flashed a moment of pain. Like a cruel joke, she thought. The iniquitousness filling her throat with bile.

Red left with Will. Across the road, Darren Preston frowned in curiosity. Will Scarlet was a well-known figure in Boston. He knew the house, that was listed as the residence of Neal Cassidy, belonged to Scarlet. As he took the photograph of Connor Scarlet's son and the beautiful raven head, he wondered to himself. _What is the connection between the Mob and Boston's new hero?_

***

Regina called Spencer as soon as it was possible. She explained that she was with Swan and that the officer was booked off due to her injured arm. He already received several calls, asking for an interview with the young officer. The Commissioner wanted to give her a medal. There were a few activist groups that also wanted to reward the officer in some manner or the other. 

The Captain already knew that his young officer would not like the attention. The official comment from HQ was _no comment_ , or _Officer Swan was not available for comment_. As he spoke to Regina, he already knew that the DA, the office of the Mayor and the Commissioner had clear directions regarding a planned career path for Swan. The DA spoke of _Emma_ as if they were long-time friends. Regina explained as much as she could to Spencer, who smiled silently. The kid was an unknown entity. Spencer felt assured that the attention would not only be unwelcomed but discouraged.

Swan was less than impressed when the Detective instructed her to wear the brace after her shower. They were alone for the first time. Regina had so many questions; she had no idea where to start. Swan surprised her by asking first. Regina knew that the officer would never have approached the subject if they were at work, but they were in Swan's environment.

"So, you and the Doc?" Regina understood the question.

"We have been friends from University." Swan nodded. Then ventured another personal question. 

"Do you have someone in your life, Detective?" Regina cogged her head at the query. She and Daniel were partners for years before she told him. She knew Red longer than that before she officially announced it.

"No." She somehow knew it was a rare opportunity. "What about you? Anyone special?" Swan gave her a shy smile.

"No." The young woman wondered to herself if she should say anything to the Detective when she asked another question.

"And you and Neal?"

"We are just friends." Regina acknowledged the comment, then added. 

"He loves you." Swan nodded.

"I know." Regina folded her arms, standing in that way that intimidated others, it still bemused her that this did not affect the Officer.

"I would go as far as to suggest that all the men in your life, love you," Then she pushed it. "More than mere platonic love." Swan gave her a skew, quick smile.

"I know, James is the only one that pushes. The others respect who I am." Regina accepted the explanation. It also explained Will's dislike and sternness with James.

Emma peeped through the window. Their moment of sharing was over.

"Do you need anything more from me, Detective?" Regina considered the question. The question was about the day before. Prince had Swan's body cam, a transcript of the radio calls and statements from the Officers that backed Swan up.

"We still need an official statement from you, Officer." She decided to keep their interaction with business. Swan said that she would type it out and email it to the Detective as soon as she could. Then there was nothing more to say. Regina tapped against her thigh.

"I will pick you up this afternoon." 

She could see the confusion in the younger woman's eyes.

"You have an appointment with Fletcher's physiotherapist at three." Emma looked at her, clearly not sure when and where the appointment was made for her. Regina gathered all her belongings, with a promise to return Emma's clothes as soon as she could. At the door, she turned to the younger woman.

"And can you please try to be more complicit with the Therapist than you were with Doctor Kelvin?" Swan smiled at her, telling the woman that she would try her very best.

***

The Darren Preston photograph, where Swan kissed Jason on the forehead was all over the place. The question that every reporter wanted to know was who Police Officer Swan was. Regina knew that no one from the Police Department was talking. A no-comment statement was also released by the Marine Corps. The predicament was, Swan became an overnight sensation. Everyone was trying to find out more about the woman. She remembered Will's words that he looked into her life and could not find anything on his friend. 

She was sure that Congresswoman Mills had already deployed her resources to do a background check on her partner. Regina knew well enough that her mother would thrive on any negative results she could dig up. She updated Spencer on her concerns regarding Swan and the idea that she was in the SOC cult, then left to go back to the house in South Boston.

***

"Miss me already?" Swan asked when she opened the door to let Regina in. The Detective shook her head. If they were going to work together, she needed to either ignore the woman's comments or teach her a different way of approach.

"Do you practise to annoy people, or does it come naturally?" Swan's face remained expressionless, but her eyes had a twinkle in them.

"No Detective, it is a gift." Regina remained quiet, the officer was baiting her. There earlier, bonding was passed. 

"We need to talk." With the words, Regina could feel a shift in the atmosphere. She sighed internally. 

"I have not even started; there is no reason for you to be defensive." Swan expressed her ignorance with an elaborate intake of breath, her hand on her heart. The Detective shook her head and turned towards her partner's room. She knew Swan would be more secure in her comfort space. She was not there to antagonise the younger woman, perhaps, she thought, she was preparing her for what was coming. 

***

Regina still remembered the agonising process of her life being ripped apart by friends and colleagues alike when her first partner died. No one was witness to a younger Regina, with blood-soaked hands, trying to revive the cop. No one cared to ask her if she was alright. A good cop was dead. She was his partner, she should have protected him, had his back. Her fate was sealed with that one mistake. Her eagerness to prove herself resulted in a backlash she was not prepared for.

The Department, the press, his family, all asked the same question accusingly with their eyes, _where were you when this happened_? It was a mistake that haunted her till this day. She knew what they called her behind her back. She knew that when Sargent Detective Colter reluctantly took her on as a partner, several officers mockingly left their bullet-proof vests on his desk with notes that they had his back.

Daniel was quick to learn that Regina was far more capable and perceptive than what she was credited with. When he told her that he trusted her with his life, it was the greatest compliment she could have wished for.

***

She convinced herself that she was here for Emma because no one was there for her. It almost worked as well, but Regina knew, her investigator instincts told her there was something amiss. The Detective chastised herself for missing the indications of abuse in Swan's behaviour. She knew Red was correct when she estimated that the kid was well adapted at hiding. Since Regina considered it, she took notice of the variety of methods Swan utilised.

Her body language was not aggressive, but there was a clear indication that one should not approach her. If that failed, she aggravated or infuriated people to back off. She was hiding her physical scars with clothes, her emotional turmoil with defence and coping mechanisms. And according to her psychological assessment, she hid whatever damage was done with intellect. Regina was curious to see if Swan was even aware of these subtle undertones.

Regina took her seat as the day before at Emma's desk. She was astounded by the fact that Emma still had her arm in the tight brace to keep it immobilised. Emma considered where to sit. She took her place on the other side of the door where her workbench was. She was in the process of sanding down a knife, after a hollow grind to get it ready for heat treatment. Regina watched her hand move methodically with a little block clamped with the 400-grid paper.

"It keeps me calm," Emma said when she became aware that the Detective was studying her. Regina could relate. She gardened. Some days just the feel of the soil in her hands would steer her away from her turmoil thoughts.

"Have you been watching the news?" Emma answered with a snort. "My mother…" Swan interrupted her instantly. 

"You are not your mother, Detective. I will not judge your character according to her opinion." The words were a relief for Regina. She considered for a moment to tell Swan that she should call her by her name if they were alone, then decided that the respect the Officer showed and their business-like approach to each other was safer.

"Thank you." Regina expressed sincerely. She placed her dark-framed-glasses on to which Emma smiled, which went unnoticed. Besides excellent hearing, she had a broad peripheral vision. Where she sat, in line with the Detective at the other desk, she could still see every move the woman made. She thought the glasses added an extra sexy to Regina's features.

"Swan, you are the focal point of every politician and every lobbying group that feel they can use this case, one way or another." Emma appeared to be unphased by the remark. She indicated that she understood but did not take her eyes off the task she was busy with.

"If you wish, your career can be rapidly advance from here. The Commissioner is going to give you a commendation." Regina had an inkling that the Officer's arrogance was a façade. Like Spencer, she believed the young woman would rather have the attention allocated elsewhere.

She expressed as much to Regina. It was not a racial matter for her. It was a young boy's life that would be altered forever. She knew too well that a taste for the things you opposed made it much harder to continue to keep your virtues.

She was impressed with Emma's calm, collective thought process. She knew from the way the Officer approach the matter that they would get along in the dissection process of another case. She understood that there was much the kid needed to learn. Still, her logical, clinical approach to the evidence indicated a mind that solved problems, without forgoing the emotional understanding of human nature. She eventually felt comfortable enough to broach the subject of Swan's past.

"How do you know all these things?" Emma answered, as before, that she read a lot. This forced Regina to stand up and look around the room. She walked from one abstract V-shaped bookcase to a conglomerate of box-shaped cases to the piles of books stacked on the floor. If there was an order or arrangement to the massive collection, it was lost on Regina.

"Have you considered acquiring a Kindle?" She asked casually. Swan stopped her work for a moment.

"It's in my bedside drawer. Mary Margaret got it for me. Said that I am killing the Amazon Rain Forest with my carbon footprint. Or some such shit." Swan rolled her eyes. Regina narrowed hers.

"Who is Mary Margaret?" She sat up, considering the question, then continued her one-handed work.

"A long story." She answered evasively.

 _God, she is good at that!_ The Detective thought in irritation.

"There is not one book here on Cults." Regina deadpanned. The tone did not affect Emma, who merely shrugged, stating that the books in her room were the once she kept, not everything she ever read. She smiled wickedly at Regina.

“And there are two books on cults in this room.”

_The invisible child_. Regina concluded. In a household run by dysfunction, the children would take on roles to fit in or to ensure their survival. The invisible child was the one who would emerge themselves in books, keep quiet and out of the way. The one who would discard any attention as opposed to the _joker_ in the family that would crave any form of notice or the rebel that acts-out, the argument that even negative attention was preferable to no attention.

She could see that Swan was comfortable in solitude. She was a thinker and likely a philosopher. Her mind would be her most potent weapon, but due to the dysfunctional learned behaviour, it could also be her worst enemy. _Goddammit! You are profiling her_. Regina pulled her thoughts back to the dilemma at hand.

"Swan?" She stood behind the woman, forcing her to stop working and turn to face the detective. When she had the kid's full attention, she continued. "Currently, the story is about Jason. Soon you will be the story. The media will scrutinize your life." She watched as Swan's body reacted, her hazel eyes turning greener.

"I am a decorated Marine Officer who served my Country and a public servant for the Boston Police Department. I have sworn an oath to uphold the Constitution, to serve and protect the citizens of this Country. That is all people need to know."

The Detective indicated her agreement. "You are absolutely correct Officer. But knowing my mother and some of the other politicians involved, I can assure you. They are already looking into your background." She noticed the contrast in Swan's body. The defeat at understanding the implications, yet the resolve to not give in. She turned back to the weapon she was refining.

"Is the Captain concerned that I will embarrass the Force?" Regina smiled a full smile behind the young woman's back. It was so radiant that it was a shame Swan did not see it.

"If that is what you think, you do not know Captain Spencer. He only cares about justice being served." Swan's hand ceased its movement.

"Will is not his father." She said defensibly, assuming that it was the issue Regina was concerned about. Regina exhaled deeply, running her hand through her just-above-the-collar dark brown thick curls. The slight ruffle made it look even better. When Swan swung her chair around, she lightly caught her breath. She moved back to her former position. Regina watched her back with curiosity.

"Are you attracted to me?" The question came out more sensual than what Regina intended. She expected Swan to deny it or give her a snippy remark. Instead, Swan turned then got up. She moved into Regina's personal space and was pleased to see the Detective's pulse-point beating faster.

"And who will blame me if I am?" The greenish eyes questioned the chocolate once as her right hand snaked to touch a delicate loose lock from Regina's face. Their proximity was close enough for Regina to feel the heat between their bodies. Her logical mind thundered for her to move away, the woman stayed put. Her four-inch heels were not enough height to meet Emma full on. The slight angle at which she tilted her head exposed her lips for Emma's view. They were plump and a dark shade of red to go with the woman's complexion.

All she had to do was to move her hand, pull this goddess in and kiss her. Emma felt the urge in her body, an undeniable desire. She licked her lips, to which Regina nearly moaned. She knew, if Emma kissed her, she would not resist.

Emma's hand glided from the dark woman's hairline to cup her cheek.

"You are exceptionally stunning." The words were barely audible. "Whoever broke your heart, was a fool." She saw the reaction in Regina's eyes. Shock, discomfort, the realisation that Emma was too close and before she could pull away, Emma gave her a whispered-breath-kiss. It was so soft, subtle, that for a moment Regina thought she imagined it. The effects, however, raged like fire through her body. It was the most intimate kiss she had ever shared with a person.

She stepped back. Emma watched the confusion on her face. Her mind trying to resolve why the kiss was so exceptional. It was not filled with lust, nor demand, it was perhaps less than a chased kiss. _Why did it have such an effect on her_?

Emma swallowed and moved away, deciding that it was safer to not be in the same room as the Detective. She took the time to make them coffee, allowing them to recover. Emma berated herself. For a year she clung to a fling to get her through her worst tour. The woman did not remember her. And here, in her closeness, her sent was the same, those eyes and lips. Emma closed her eyes to will away the memory. It was almost five years ago, the only evidence from it ever happening, was a torn G-string that Emma kept.

"Fuck, you are stupid Swan." She scolded herself, not realising that the woman was standing behind her in the kitchen. She was so preoccupied with her thoughts that she never heard her approach.

"Do you regret it?" Regina's voice was filled with emotion. Emma instantly turned to face her.

"Kissing you?" Regina nodded. The light was back in Emma's eyes. "No." She answered, honestly.

"Was that a kiss?" Regina questioned unsurely. Emma stood closer to her. If she wanted to, she could touch the woman. The distance was enough, however, for Regina to move away if she chose to. She smiled sincerely at the older woman that appeared to be a tad more fragile than what she was a moment before.

"It was something," Emma admitted huskily, sending a thrill through Regina's body. "I guess it is safe to say that I am attracted to you, Detective." Regina understood the implications of the sentence. She smiled sadly, then added.

"I assure you, the feeling is mutual Officer Swan." They stayed like that. Sharing a moment that both knew had meaning. Emma broke away first, finishing their coffee and carrying the two cups back to her room.

After the intimate moment, Regina ventured to the case, choosing it as a safe option, until her questions became more personal. "Will?" She broached the subject.

"As I explained Detective, he is not his father. He tried to stay out of it as long as he could." She shrugged. "I don’t know if he is involved. I would never ask him. The same way he would never ask me what you want to know."

There it was, Regina smiled and turned her head to look at the Officer. 

"And what is the information I require?"

Emma looked deep and long at the woman. She was certain of two things; that she would not like to piss this woman off and that the last thing she needed was to get into an intellectual altercation with Detective Mills. She knew her capacity and knowledge were on par with the Detective. But Emma understood her shortcomings. She would never hold a candle to the woman's experience in, interrogation.

Emma returned to her work on the knife. Regina was half disappointed when she steered clear of the challenge.

"Just ask Detective. The worst that can happen is that I will lose my temper." 

It was an admission that Regina would not have guessed. But then again, Emma had such a firm grasp on her emotions. The girl summarised from the beginning that Regina was not only profiling her but subtly trying to sneak past the well-constructed walls between them. She already made up her mind to study Swan's file more. Hoping that she would find some of her answers there. 

Her psychology was a study of the criminal mind. Profiling killers from their victims. She started to place some of the pieces together, in the hope of understanding Swan a bit better. She mentally shook her head. _What did she know about the woman? She could fight, was gay, lived in Boston for over six years. Had a degree, hated her first name and joined the Marines?_

"Swan?" The blonde-head did not move.

"Yes, Detective?" Regina inhaled. Did she expect this to be easy?

"What was it about the murder. What did you see that I did not?" Swan turned her head to look at the woman. There was a deep frown on the officer's face. She thought she cleared up all the issues the night before. 

"You want to know if I profiled him?" Regina leaned her head slightly to her right. Then she nodded. "Yes, I would like to know?" Swan already turned back to look at what she was doing.

"Didn’t have to, I recognised him." She spoke more to herself than to Regina. It was the opening Regina was looking for. 

“Were you there?” The green-hazel eyes looked at her.

“No, I told you I read a lot." The Detective rolled her eyes. 

“You know more about this than what you are letting people belief.”

"Fine. In the years you have been a cop, have you ever seen a murder like that?"

She had seen several slit throats. "No."

"Have you ever heard of a decapitation in Boston?" The detective thought about the inquiry. She has seen footage of serial killer victims, thinking about Jeffery Delmer in particular.

"No."

Emma continued her questioning. "So here comes a VICE cop, look at the guy, look at the wound and without a blood-spatter report, or an analysis of the weapon, it's size, width, what the fuck ever. I tell you, what the weapon is, discover the man's identity. And tell the M.E he's a fuck-head?" Regina's mind was cringing at the vulgar, however, accurate account of the crime scene.

"That would be correct."

"What then, is the most logical conclusion?" Regina thought about her first instinct, telling Spencer that no cop was that good. The idea that somehow, she solved the murder because she was involved.

Swan started a quotation; " _When you have eliminated all which is impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth_."

Regina's mind worked overtime. _Sherlock Holmes, she is quoting Sherlock Holms!_ "You have seen it before!"

"Yeah," Emma answered dejectedly. "That, or I did it, knowing who he was beforehand." Regina tapped a slender manicured finger against her leg.

"I also read a lot." Swan continued, rattling the Detective completely.

"You mean to tell me, you just made up that shit?" Swan gave her a profound grin.

"God and here I thought you only knew five-syllable words, none of which can be considered crude." Regina was furious at being played.

"You are a piece of excrement!"

Swan roared with laughter. "Three syllables! Awesome Detective." She continued to look at the livid woman with a smile, her green eyes told a different story, and if Regina looked towards her, she would have understood so much more. Making the detective annoyed was far better than telling her the truth.

***

Regina realised that the officer was by far more insightful than what she pretended. She was slowly unravelling this peculiar addition to her life. The mystery was, Emma was doing the same thing. She knew they would go at each other until one of them started to open by themselves. She was hiding her heart and Swan was hiding her past. Neither knew how badly the other has been hurt or the deep-seated repercussions of their emotional reclusiveness. Regina knew that with Swan, it was trust, with her, it was different. She could trust, she did not want to love. Not if it meant she could go through the same hurt her mother had inflicted on her all those years ago. She wondered for a moment if Swan would ever betray her like that. Cora Mills had a way of digging until she knew what a person required most. Everyone had a price at the end of the day.

***


	11. A terrible enemy

Emma was assigned a desk job for another week. Her annoyed gruffness with Red did nothing to change the Doctor's mind about her injury. Emma complied with all her requests, which indicated to Will that his girl was in more pain than what she let on. She returned to work without the arm brace, and by the end of her shift, she was sorry she did. 

Regina gave her a pile of reports to complete. They did not talk about their feelings again; each woman carried on as before. Esmeralda watched them. It was not strain that radiated between them, but there was a definite undertone of something. While Emma was recovering, Sean partnered with the Detective. 

***

They drove all the way to Shirley to interview Bruce Larker at Souza-Baranowski Correctional Centre. Regina did not know what to expect, but whatever it was, Bruce Larker was not it. He was literary a taller, more muscular version of his brother. The man had the same intellectual reasoning as Steven. He was chained to the table because he was considered too dangerous. His mannerisms, however, showed a timid man. Regina handed him a letter Steven had written to him. He cried as he read it, then questioned the Detective. 

“Do you know where Sarah is?”

“I do not know Mr Larker. Why is she important to you?” The man ignored the question.

“She’s in Boston.” This information surprised Regina and Sean. The man told her that he received a package every other month. No return address but the postmark was Boston. Regina continued the interview.

Bruce related to her how he tracked down and killed his parents. He looked at her new crime scene and bellowed with laughter as he saw the mutilated body of _Simon Green_. He looked at the manner in which the Reverend was killed.

“There were a few of us that continued to believe till the end.” He tossed the photographs towards the Detective. “We were all baptised with Christian names.” He sat back looking at her. “You are looking for someone that held up his beliefs. When he killed this fuck, he believed he killed a daemon.”

It was the same conclusion Emma came to. Regina asked for further detail. The picture Bruce Larker sketched was hard to hear. He elaborated on David King’s teachings and cruelty. The abuse that everyone was subjected to. He stopped to think.

“Nathaniel!” Regina encouraged him to carry on. Bruce described a boy that did not mind the sexual abuse, claiming that he might have been gay. The result was that he became a favoured among most _deacons_. The aspect that he detested was killing animals and the exorcisms. The one activity was too violent for him, and the other was too painful for the young man.

“If anyone needs to get back at these fucks and rid himself of the violence, it would be him.” The Detective was not happy with the answer. _What would have pushed a gentle soul to these extremes of violence_? Larker shrugged at her unvoiced question.

“Maybe, after he got out, he had a revelation.” Regina found the explanation intriguing. It was also Emma’s explanation, therapy. If she did not know better, she would suspect that Swan and Bruce Larker correlated their responses. She ventured in that direction. 

“Where do you get this insight?” He smiled a reassuring smile.

“My brother, he is the smart one. I read his books.”

“Any other person?” Bruce contemplated the question. He could think of hundreds of kids as he tapped impatiently on the desk.

“King would not be alone; he liked his following. More people will die.” His words echoed in her mind. It was the same warning Swan gave her. She asked him about Emma Swan. Confident that Swan had a connection to SOC. Larker told her that his parents settled there first. It was how he tracked them after he heard about the Christian Warriors. Some of their philosophies were similar to SOC. He investigated it and found their trail in the town. It was also the last known whereabouts of his sister, Sarah.

As before, the explanation was a copy of Steven Allard’s answer to the same question. Bruce Larker had not received a single visitor in his accumulated incarceration. Other than the care-package he obtained, he got no other mail. If she was not aware of all these facts, she would have assumed that Swan collaborated with the brothers to spin a theory. Their answers, however, were too similar to be mere coincidence. She needed to investigate it further. Her mind started to conjure the thought that if she could find Swan’s true identity, it would resolve numerous loose ends in her case.

***

As Regina predicted, Swan's life was pulled apart. She was a hot story, the new hero of Boston. Any and everyone had an opinion on her. Emma would watch the news that night and listen to people who claimed they knew her. She would go to her room and quietly work on her projects. Neal kept a close eye on her.

There were people all over the country that had a voice. Cora Mills was one of those. Whenever the television was on, she would be on one of the major news networks. She appeared on talk shows, and she definitely got her point across. 

Like her daughter, she carried something in her essence, something feminine, alluring and dangerous. She was beautiful, a different kind of attractiveness from Regina. Her mannerisms were precise, and she played with words, much like the Detective. It was easy for Emma to see Cora in Regina, but like Will, Regina was not her mother. The woman had a ferocity in her that made her opposition quiver and left dim-witted journalists in the wake of superior intellectual entanglements. The woman was getting her point across, and voters were listening.

***

The day of the ceremony, which Emma tried to avoid at all cost, she sat stiffly between Lieutenant Wood and Captain Spencer. In her stubbornness, she had forgone the sling once more. She paid no attention to the Commissioner, the Mayor or any of the other speakers. Swan had missed both her valour ceremonies due to her injuries. On those locations, Captain Taylor, her Commanding Officer, stepped in for her and received the Purple Heart and Bronze Star on her behalf. The Captain knew that mentally his Marine was in no condition to be surrounded by an enquiring crowd. She had no such luck with Captain Spencer. She could see Regina in her uniform, sitting next to Sargent Detective Prince. It was awkward asking Regina for her assistance. She did not have to explain a lot before Regina realised that the kid was asking her for help.

"I don’t do well with crowds. Or with people." The Detective assured her that she, Herman and Prince would be by her side and accompany her back as soon as they could.

Captain Spencer stood to help her up when the Commissioner announced her. Spencer could see that his officer was trying to keep herself calm and had; therefore, no idea that she was called upon. She stood, grateful for his discretion. The Commissioner pinned the medal to her chest, stood back and she saluted him. She was about to turn to her seat when he indicated for her to say something. Regina smiled when she saw the Officer give him a look that could kill.

Swan took her place on the podium. The few that knew her saw the anxiety. For the rest of the masses, she seemed calm. Emma cleared the strain from her voice, then in a softly spoken manner, thanked the officers that assisted her by name, ending by saying, they were the once who were protecting the City and her. 

"I merely ran fast." The phrase caused an eruption as the crowd cheered, chanting her name. She acknowledged it with a nod and a small smile. Prince looked towards Mills while they were clapping.

"Not what I expected." He confessed. Regina smiled, an assuring smile towards the rookie, whose eyes had been on her all the time.

"She is far less arrogant than what one would imagine." She informed him. Then he noticed the constant eye contact between the women. He knew better than to ask.

Emma was ready to leave the moment the ceremony was over. Still, Captain Spencer steered her towards the rest of the participants making up the executive party, where they gathered at the town hall after the presentation. Her first glimpse of Cora Mills made her heart stop. There was something ominous about the woman. Her smile was perfect, like the rest of her, but Emma could instantly feel the lack of warmth from the woman. She turned to catch the where-a-bouts of Regina when the Congresswoman approached.

"She is being kept, busy Officer." The Congresswoman intuitively knew who Emma was looking for. She held out a hand which Emma shook. Her grip was firm, yet every move was polite and feminine.

"I am Cora Mills." She stated. Not that she needed an introduction.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Congresswoman," Emma answered politely, to which the Congresswoman smiled widely.

"If you want to succeed in these games, Emma. You will need to learn to lie better." Her facial expressions completely belied the words she was forming, as cameras flashed around the two women. Emma kept her composure as she remarked on the Congresswoman's comment.

"I find myself unclear as to what games you are referring to Congresswoman." The woman turned to hold both of Swan's hands. To the world, it would appear the older one, giving the young officer a motherly touch and with it, share her wisdom. She was still smiling; her eyes were the only feature that belied the venom in her words.

"If you interfere with my plans for Regina, I will destroy your career. More so, if you do anything to taint the Mills name, I will end you." 

If it was not said so seriously, Emma would have cracked laughing. At that moment, Regina joined them. She kept a respectful distance from Emma, but when her mother indicated her action, Regina leaned in for a kiss on her cheek. Flashes were going off as the three women glared at each other smiling. They were out of eavesdrop from others. Emma informed Regina of the topic of conversation with the Congresswoman, with as much charm as she could muster.

"Detective, thank you for attending. Your mother just informed me that she would kill me if I fuck her daughter. I had to inform her that unfortunately, that bridge was already burned."

To her credit, Cora Mills did nothing. She continued even breaths as the anger swept through her body. She stood there, tall, elegant with the unwavering smile present. Regina let out a laugh, that was clear as a bell. The fact that the laughter was more genuine than fake irritated Cora more. Regina cleared a little laugh-tear from the corner of her eye before she addressed the officer with jubilant glee.

"And here I thought you could not possibly make my day. I keep on underestimating you, Swan." There was a twinkle in her eyes which Emma accepted with relieve. She was instantly angered by the Congresswoman's words, that she did not contemplate the consequences of her impulsive reaction.

"Well then," The Congresswoman turned stiffly. "We will see who laughs the last Darling." She kissed her daughter with a fake affection on the cheek and made her way to other, more influential people.

Regina turned to Swan and slapped her on the arm.

"Ouch." Emma faked an injury.

"Are you dense? She can destroy you in an instant, you made a terrible enemy today." Emma smiled at the concern she heard in the words.

"Yeah, but did you see her face?" Regina tried to ignore the young woman's joy. She was having a hard time from completely falling into a fit of laughter.

The women were approached by a shortish, slender man. Regina wanted to push Emma out of the way, but she moved a step towards him. He took her hand in a familiar manner, pulling her in to place a fatherly kiss on her cheek. A soft smile adorned his face. Regina realised it was reserved only for Swan since she had never seen the reputable judge ever smile.

“I am so proud of you, my dear.” His voice and mannerisms were softly spoken. Regina was taken aback. She knew the judge. He was regularly invited to the Mills manner by her father. She had only ever known him to be harsh and brunt. _The Crocodile_ , as everyone in Boston called him, was known to be the one Judge that could not be bribed, neither intimidated. More often than not, anyone that was sentenced in his court received the maximum penalty.

“Thank you, Judge Rumple.” Emma smiled fondly back at him, then introduced him to Regina.

“Miss Mills, always a pleasure.” Regina looked from one to the other, trying to figure out the relationship between them. The informal greeting Emma addressed him by, made it clear that he was a friend. For her, Emma’s trusted circle was becoming stranger by the day. She met the son of the Irish Mob boss and the most intolerable Judge in Boston, in one week.

The Judge asked Regina if she would excuse them. As they walked off, the Judge introduced Emma to a few acquaintances, Regina studied them.

She had already picked up that Emma disliked authority figures. She hated the limelight and yet, here she was entirely at ease with Judge Rumple Gold. After a few minutes of mingling, The Judge spoke to Emma in private. Regina watched as the blonde head nodded a few times before she kissed the man on his cheek and held him tightly in an embrace. It was the most puzzling aspect of unravelling Emma Swan’s life thus far.

Spencer joined Emma with the DA at his side soon after the Judge’s departure. Emma, who had only ever seen the man on television was once more unimpressed. He grabbed her hand and shook it. Cameras flashing. Preston was at the forefront. For his appearance, the DA took hold of Swan's upper left arm, to turn her for a full-face picture to the press. Preston again took the shot as the blood drained from Emma's face. 

Regina felt her panic. It took her a moment to realise what the matter was. It was difficult to defuse the situation with everyone looking. To her relief, Spencer realised the problem as well. 

She gently pushed the man away from Emma, without causing a scene, while Spencer distracted him, telling him through a clenched teeth fake smile, that he was hurting the Officer. Regina was less diplomatic. Her back turned to the invading press.

"She has thirty-two stitches in her arm! Right where you were holding her." She was furious. "Can't you think, or was that power pose, just too much to resist?" 

Edmund Dante felt all the charisma melt from him. He opened his mouth to apologise, but Spencer and Mills flanked Emma. Prince joined them after the Captain indicated for him to do so. Regina and Emma were in the Mercedes and on their way back to the station before anyone realised the guest of honour was absent.

Regina kept a worried look on her. Emma did not utter a sound. She placed her right hand over the injured arm and sat back in the car. Her eyes closed. The moment the Mercedes stopped in front of the Precinct. Herman came to help Emma out of the vehicle. She was breathing deeply, and he could see the perspiration on her brow.

"Hang in there, Kid." He encouraged.

Regina opened a pathway for them by scowling at the first officer that was in their way.

"Take her to my desk," Regina instructed.

For a moment, Detective Mills did not know what to do. She crouched before Emma, where she was now sitting in a chair at the back of the bullpen. They received very little attention since the entire ceremony did not sit right with most of the cops.

"Swan, you need to take your jacket off." She inhaled and nodded her understanding to the Detective. It was one thing, thinking Emma had a high threshold for pain and another knowing that she hid the pain better than others. If she could not conceal her hurt, Regina feared for the worst.

Regina helped her out of the formal dress uniform. When the jacket dropped to the ground, Regina sneered. Many cops had seen her angry. Many had seen her tear a suspect limb from limb in an interview. No one had ever seen this side of her. She prowled like an angry predator.

"Get me a med kit?" She yelled over the bullpen. She wiped the sweat-soaked hair from Emma's forehead.

"Swan, where is your knife?" She asked as the young woman let her head rest against Regina's leg. The stress in her body was apparent to anyone who looked. Emma told her it was in her jacket. The Detective quickly found the pocketknife and with it, cut the dress-shirt sleeve from Emma's arm.

The few cops that ventured closer to see what was happening, respectfully stood back when they witnessed the bruising and the blood on Swan’s arm. There were a few cops that said she faked her injury, angry at the commendation the Officer received. No one would say a word after seeing her in so much pain.

Regina thanked the officer who arrived with the first aid kit. She and Herman pulled on the latex gloves, going to work on cleaning the blood off Swan's arm.

"She ripped the stitches," Herman confirmed, then asked what happened. Everyone in the vicinity heard Detective Mills retell the story, remarking that it was a blatant political setup. Most agree with her.

"Swan you need medical care," Regina said it softly, knowing now how the Officer would react to this. For the first time, she turned to look at the injury. It was bleeding, but it was much less than what she expected. She realised the DA must have bruised her arm and in pulling away, she pulled a few stitches.

"I need some rum and a vacation." She declared.

Someone had the foresight to call the EMT's. When they arrived, they cleaned the kid up and replaced two stitches. They told Emma that the wound was healing nicely.

Regina helped her get into a clean uniform, not without protests from the kid, but it went much more comfortable than the last time they were in the same situation. Regina knotted her tie for her, looking deep in her eyes when she asked the question. 

"Please let me know if you are hurt. I will not always be able to read your body language like today." She got a small nod and took it as a step in a better direction.

When Emma was back at Regina's desk, she took her discarded uniform from the floor and yanked the medal she received that morning from it. Regina was right, it was a political play, and it discussed her. She threw the commendation on Regina's desk, who lifted a questioning brow. 

"And what am I supposed to do with that?" Emma shrugged.

"Keep it in your desk drawer." It was an odd request. Regina pointed it out, noticing several people's attention on Emma.

"You should wear it with honour," Emma confirmed the statement.

"And I will Detective, as soon as every other cop in the Precinct gets one for doing their fucking jobs." The comment invoked a few laughs. Several veteran cops nodded their approval, as the rest continued with their work. Swan took a stack of files from Regina's desk and made her way to an open one. Starting to go through cold cases that Detective Regina assigned her.


End file.
